Cool kids, geeky parents

[AllisonR]

Anyone else out there? What's the pluses, minuses, long term prognosis...? Do you not get where your kids are at, what they are doing....? Are the kids truly comfortable with you being you?

DH programs telephones, pre-press sw, manages databases, and I don't know what. I am a sw supporter, specializing in color management. No, not cool in the slightest. We are not total geeks; we have our friends. But we are not at the height of fashion, we don't get or care about all the social cues, we probably have a few aspie tendencies.... 

DS is a bit quirky, like myself. I hope he has a smooth, peaceful life, but when he runs into trouble it upsets me. On the other hand, since I have btdt, I can relate. 

DD is very cool. She is the most popular, leeds her group, knows all the fashions, what is in and out, who is who - I mean she knows EVERYONE. Everyone knows her. I'm not bragging or complaining. More scratching my head wondering where in heck this came from - not from DH or myself. Where did she get these skills? Because obviously we didn't teach her. And I guess I'm wondering what it means in the long term, to our relationship with DD, if anything. 

[Bokonon]

I think most kids think they are cool and their parents are geeks!  At least, I did when I was younger, and so did most of my friends.  I think it's probably a good thing though, as having role models that are hard-working, intelligent, and "normal" is a lot better than having unattainable role models (like celebrities or ultra-cool parents).

[Storm Bride]

I get where you're coming from, OP. DH and I are both introverted, somewhat hermit-like and kind of geeky/nerdy/something or other. We're not into fashion (personally, I think clothes shopping is an overlooked circle of hell) or trends or whatever, and I usually have no idea what's "in" (I had no clue as a teen, either). I like to have a very small circle (eg. 2-4) of close friends, and don't like large social gatherings. I've always felt like a misfit, and school was a nightmare, mostly for social reasons.

DS1? I have no idea how he happened. I know he gets some of this from his dad (he's from my first marriage), but not all of it. He's social, creative, athletic, outgoing, etc. He could be out at parties/social events every day of the week, and still want to come home and talk. He's one of the most extraverted people I've ever met, and is quite image conscious. He loves shopping for clothes. He's super popular and has more separate "crowds" than I had total friends.

So far, it hasn't meant much in terms of our relationship. He's himself. We're ourselves. It works. I don't know what it will be like when he's an adult, but so far, everything's fine.

[mamazee]

My dh and I are geeky and have a cool kid too.  I'm puzzled by how that happened.  It has been useful sometimes because, for instance, this one time she didn't want to play with a kid because the kid wasn't cool, and I asked for specifics, and she basically described a youthful me.  So I said, "You know, that's just how I was when I was a kid.  Would you not have played with me?"  She looked at me funny, and then called the girl back and invited her over.