I just joined this site recently. My partner and I have lived here in South St. Louis City for about a year, moving from very liberal, queer-friendly South Florida. My first piece of advice is that you should adjust your expectations a bit. St. Louis is the midwest. It's never going to be as progressive as ATL or anywhere similar. And it's a heck of alot smaller and less populated than ATL, so you'd have to expect a significant "scale down" in terms of places, activities, things to do. But there alot of really great things about St. Louis.
St. Louis is one of those places that whether someone agrees with what you're doing on or not, they wouldn't dare say it. It's very tolerant. Even the little old ladies in our neighborhood are accepting and courteous, which I didn't find to be the case in Florida. And you'd actually be surprised how liberal many people are, specifically in the city. There are many gay friendly restaurants and businesses here and I've yet to hear of any homophobic incidences. We also have a ton of great museums, performance halls, parks, and alot of really great <usually free and family friendly> activities, concerts, festivals, and block parties in the spring, summer, and fall.
We are in the first stages of our TTC journey, just getting labs done and starting to chart and such. So no (non furred or feathered) family yet so I can't speak to actually raising a child here for lesbians. I did spend most of my formative years here and I have very fond memories. St. Louis people tend to stay in St. Louis. So you really can make friends for life. And St. Louis is kind of like a city but a small town at the same time. By this I just mean that wherever you go, you see someone you know or someone who knows someone you know. Also, St. Louis is ridiculously affordable.
I do tend to be dissapointed with the lack of lesbian activities/groups/etc here that don't involve bars. But I also found that to be the case in South Florida and elsewhere.
I would recommend staying in or right outside the city. The further you go outside of the city the less tolerance you'll find. If you come into town, let me know. We'd be happy to give you a tour and introduce you to some people. :-)