I don't want to be all morbid and everything, but I thought it would be a good idea to have a PAL thread in the DDC for those of us with losses to have a place to gather. I am soooo nervous about even joining the DDC and it is even harder to hang out in the general areas knowing there's a chance I might not be around for the whole 9 months. I have a living son who took 2 years to conceive. Then I got pg again in April '10 with DC #2. Everything was going smoothly with my pg...very much the same as with DS...until we had our first u/s and discovered that the baby had no heartbeat. That was at 11wks, but the baby only measured 9wks. My body never acknowledged the loss and waited over 3 wks to m/c naturally. When the 2nd tri came around and there were still no signs of bleeding or cramping, I chose to have a D&C.
Having a m/c was one of the hardest things I have ever been through and I am scared out of my mind with this pregnancy. I am 5w3d today and still have very few symptoms. A little more tired than usual, slight waves of nausea from time to time, and peeing a little more often. I'm not so worried about an early loss (although I know it can happen), but I'm terrified of going to an u/s and finding out another baby died inside of me. Our first u/s is scheduled for December 29th. I was initially hoping to have it sooner, but now I'm glad it won't be until after Christmas. I can't even think about how I would deal with the holiday if it's bad news.
Anyway...it would be great for everyone else if I was the only one who needs this thread, but I have a feeling there may be more PAL mamas here in the Aug '11 DDC and I hope we can use this as a place to share our fears and hopes.