Deep Breaths - 6 months & hitting the wall - Page 2

[SeattleRain]

Originally Posted by THBVsMommy 

Could it be lactose overload? I noticed you mentioned hyperlactation in your OP. Here's a wonderful article of lactose intolerance (primary & secondary) and lactose overload.

http://www.breastfeeding.asn.au/bfinfo/lactose.html

Yes, this is what I was thinking! This article had some suggestions of tests that one can do for lactose intolerance and I'd really suggest you get that done. You also could try something like probiotics. This article seems to think that the gut needs to be healed and that's why secondary lactose intolerance takes place and probiotics are great for that. 

At 8 weeks, I just felt like something was up with my son. He was crying all the time, gaining weight poorly, and would never take a bottle (which means he never ate, because I couldn't breastfeed). My pediatrician observed a feeding and she said he looks like he has a classic case of reflux and promptly put him on medication. I've never been happier and he's gaining weight slowly but steadily. I'm so glad I pushed and listened to my instincts that what was happening wasn't normal. It sounds like you're feeling like something isn't normal either.

[Aka mommy]

Ok, I just got an hour and a half with only one feeding in the middle, nap with him so I think i'm oriented enough to answer everything! Thank you for all the replies, they mean a lot to me. Even if i can't figure out or cure what ever the problem is, I'm one of those mom's who wants to try everything I know and then look for alternatives. If i've done everything I can and he is just who is is, at least I know i tried my best as a mom.

 

Originally Posted by Cecilia's Mama 

We use the fleece Swaddleme blanket (my daughter is 8 months but a tiny thing at 16 lbs). What did you want to know about them?

The last time I heard of a baby being severely lactose intolerant, he was put on a prescription soy formula and his problems cleared up very quickly. I would hate for you to lose the breastfeeding relationship you have with your baby, but is it a possibility to talk to your doctor about that and see what he/she thinks? If it made the difference for your baby's growth and temperament, it might be worth it? And let me say, just so you know, that I am a HUGE lactivist. I have gone to great ends to breastfeed my daughter with a low supply due to breast reduction surgery, and to supplement her with donated milk. I am definitely not a formula pusher. I just wonder in this situation, KWIM?

Are there any that do not swaddle the arms? He HATES having his arms swaddled, but loves his lower half. Also, the fleece ones, any issues with them overheating while cosleeping? DS will snuggle into dh's arms at night (ironically enough) between feedings sometimes and they are little heaters together. Should i just go with the cooler ones made for summer nights?

My ped has mentioned it but we both wanted to try everything first, as he truly supports breast is best. So we've been doing the elimination diet and so on. My biggest concern is that now he is dropping weight. He's down 3 lbs, which i dont remember either of my girls' doing. The only problem with weight was my oldest had severe reflux and lost almost 2 pounds in the first 2 weeks of her life. But once she was on the reflux meds, she was just fine on breastmilk.

Originally Posted by Buzzer Beater 

Aka Mommy,

I do use a velcro swaddle on DD. Otherwise she's out in a second. We didn't swaddle her for awhile in there, and when we went back to it her sleep improved so much we couldn't believe it. She just sighs and heads off to sleep. We are also going through an "only mommy please" stage, even tho DH has been the nighttime parent from the beginning. He is such a hands on dad and I think it hurts him a bit when he can't soothe her. Hang in there, I hope you get a break.

Sara

Bolded is how DH feels. DS has been a mommy only boy. Whereas our girls were content with either of us to soothe them to sleep after they were fed by me. Middle dd would even take a bottle of breastmilk she was so laid back. But ds wouldn't go NEAR dh for months? He would scream bloody murder if dh tried to hold him, so for months i was everything. Then i severely sprained my ankle and we had no choice as i couldnt bear any weight on it and they forged a bond. It's much better, but once I got back on my feet i took back over due to dh's constant traveling. I really feel badly for dh, he feels like less of a father this time around because that bond isn't there this time as it was with the previous 2 girls.
 

Originally Posted by evabea 

I'm not swaddling now, but my cousin sent me the Miracle Blanket, and that kept DD in very well, while also allowing a more natural position for the legs. And you can change the diaper without taking the arms out. I might try swaddling again, as she keeps waking herself up in REM sleep, rubbing her face til she's awake.

On soothing, DD's dad doesn't live with us and is only with her 4 nights a week, and has been gone a lot the past couple of weeks, so she really turns to me more into me for comfort. Which is a pain for me when I want a break and vicious cycle since they're not learning that together. I'm not looking forward to the separation anxiety stage!

I loved Happiest Baby on the Block, and wish i'd read it when she was born. Sounds like you're doing most of the things already, good luck aka Mommy!

DS does that too,. He will rub at his face and wake himself up. Never really correlated the 2, thank you!

 

Originally Posted by matey 

So sorry mama. :hug I completely understand, you just described life when my son was a baby. I did move him to the crib at 8 months. It was a long transition, but it enabled me to get some sleep when I could and it made him sleep better too. We have dealth with all the allergies and limited diet, lack of sleep and all that together makes a mama feel like a crazy person. I know you dont want to bother dh, but it is super important for you to get some time to refresh yourself. Maybe he could take ds out of earshot so you wont hear him fussing. I know for me, if I hear the baby being upset with dh, I dont feel relaxed. I feel hyped up and rushed.

You ahve a high needs babay, but it will get better. I am so sorry it is so rough.

Have you tried him on probiotics?

My biggest complaint is that ds WAS in little cosleeping bassinet right next to my bed on top of the unused toddler bed. He would nurse, then sleep for 2 hours in his bassinet, then nurse and so on. He had no issue going in and out of the bassinet and I had a routine down. But when dh took over and had to get him up and lift him to me to nurse, he would get lazy and not put him back in his bassinet and i was too tired or in too much pain to fight the battle. Now that i really pinpoint it that was the last time we had 2 hour stretches of sleep at night. Is it habit or allergies or high needs, or is it a combo of all 3?

I feel exactly the same. I cannot stand the fussing or crying, it makes my blood pressure shoot through the roof. DH has this weekend off so he's just going to have to maybe take him for a walk and try to get him to sleep so i can get an extra hour here or there.

I had him on probiotics until we realized it had dairy in it. And i have been unable to find an affordable dairy and soy free probiotic until last night. I have yet to order it, but am going to ask my chiro and mw's what they think.

 

Originally Posted by TSomm 

Hugs to you!  I've been there, but only have one to deal with thankfully.

For my DD, we have white noise, DARK room, swaddle, rocking, and a tight clutch.  The white noise has become her signal that it's naptime.  She can't sleep if it's too bright.  I've noticed on sunnier days it's a bad nap day.  BUT, also getting outside helps.  If we take a nice brisk walk just before naptime (don't let them fall asleep on the walk) she'll go down easier.

I told DH that i should just know it by now, we only make high needs baby. The one baby who was easy and no where near high needs was my surrogate baby! I remember her parent's reporting to the mw's that she slept through the night from 2 weeks on, was never an issue and was so calm and compliant! I laughed at loud thinking to myself at least i know it's not my womb or anything I'm doing during the pregnancy, it is solely me and dh's genes!!!

You described DS, he has to have the darkest room possible, even during the day. The rocking and tight hold and swaddle too. Right now i'm using the fan against the wall and it's a very loud fan. I haven't yet tried walking, but my ankle is fairly healed so i may start doing that. He LOVES being outside, just adores it. We are out and about a lot, but not on specific walks. So i will try that. I keep thinking i just need to tire him out, because i remember once my girls were walking they seemed to finally sleep in 3-4 hour stretches.

 

Originally Posted by sssheri 

I'm so sorry. Big hugs. I thought of this blog post when I read your post. Hopefully it will help you. http://kellyraeroberts.blogspot.com/2010/09/colic-solved.html

She recommends a book called "Colic Solved: The Esential Guide to Infant Reflux and the Care of Your Crying, Difficult-to- Soothe Baby .It really does sound like a gastro condition/ allergy. I would make sure to be a strong advocate for your son with the doctor and make sure they take you seriously and don't chalk it up to being colicky. 

The happiest baby techniques work great, especially on newborns, but I imagine it would be soothing to any baby. It probably won't solve your problem, but maybe give you and your son a little relief. Basically you want to recreate a womb-like environment. So swaddling to constrict movement (I like the miracle blanket a lot ) shushing or white noise to (The Marpac SleepMate is great but expensice. You could just use your radio to a fuzzy station and turn the volume way up) rocking (babywearing, swing, wiggling them in your arms) and sucking (pacifier, mommy, a finger). 

Thank you, i'm going to check it out further. I skimmed it. Reminds me a LOT of my girls. My oldest had GERD and my 2nd had silent Reflux. First we medicated, 2nd we didn't because no one believed she had reflux. It helps to hear others point out a gastro issue, because i know in my heart it has to do with his stomach. He is so miserable at night but in a completely different way then my girls.

Going to read some of it tonight and see what we can do. I know we have a very womb like environment in our room, i did it without realizing it all the way to the dark, dark maroon curtains that ds has been enchanted with since birth. My mw and i have always joked that ds must think he's back in his womb sometimes. I think i'll hold off on a white noise machine as we don't have spare cash right now with christmas coming up, but we do use the fan and shower's nightly.
 

Originally Posted by SeattleRain 

Originally Posted by Cecilia's Mama 

We use the fleece Swaddleme blanket (my daughter is 8 months but a tiny thing at 16 lbs). What did you want to know about them?

The last time I heard of a baby being severely lactose intolerant, he was put on a prescription soy formula and his problems cleared up very quickly. I would hate for you to lose the breastfeeding relationship you have with your baby, but is it a possibility to talk to your doctor about that and see what he/she thinks? If it made the difference for your baby's growth and temperament, it might be worth it? And let me say, just so you know, that I am a HUGE lactivist. I have gone to great ends to breastfeed my daughter with a low supply due to breast reduction surgery, and to supplement her with donated milk. I am definitely not a formula pusher. I just wonder in this situation, KWIM?

This. I wonder if there's something going on digestively with your milk, like even the milk proteins in breastmilk are hurting her tummy. If this is the case, you could really see an improvement in her quality of life with a prescription formula, or even a regular soy formula.You definitely should talk to your doctor about that since your daughter is 6 months old and you're still seeing a lot of problems. Also, aren't green mucosy poops a symptom of overactive letdown? I feel like I've heard that somewhere. It might be worthwhile to seek the assistance of a lactation consultant or a LLL group if that's the case.

I also use the fleece swaddleme blanket. We were in the same DDC, and when Daniel was first born I used muslin swaddling blankets but he's way too big for those now. We use the fleece ones because they're the only things that come in a size large. You have to do them QUITE tight or else the baby can find ways to escape. I think BRU has them on sale right now. It sounds like a read of Happiest Baby on the Block could really help you perfect your technique since the stuff seems to be working right now. He's really into the swing thing. Personally I would save your money on a white noise machine. We bought an iTunes cd of white noise and put it on repeat in Daniel's room.

LLL told me it was a sign of overactive letdown. Which i have but it's nothing in comparison to the first few months. I hyperlactate and have overactive letdown. I got 4 cases of mastitis and was producing 120 oz of milk when solely pumping for my surrogacy and with ds, after the 3rd case of mastitis we all agreed to start pumping to just get rid of the milk my body clearly made no matter who or what we did. I was pumping about 60 oz a day including nursing ds. The weirdest part, was that he NEVER vomited or puked the first 2 months. At all. We were in shock after 2 refluxy babies. But he never did and we thought finally we had a baby with a normal tummy. I'm confused as to why he would start puking later, after i got my supply down. I still can pump about 5 oz per breast in about 5 minutes. BUT that's WAY down thanks to block feeding, sage tincture and a few other things we worked our butts off on lowering my supply. LLL said that block feeding would be the major thing to help with overactive let down, aside from pumping first then latching him on. I'll admit, i've been lazy and too tired to pump before he demands the breast. I abhor the pump and have been slacking on that lately and only do it when his schedule is wonky and i can feel mastitis about to come on or have overfull breasts.

I'll check those out at BRU, i also have a 20% off coupon so it's a good time to get one. Thanks!

And a swing question. Right now we are in a tiny 900 square foot apartment so we have a tiny portable swing that also acts as a vibrating chair. That's what he is in. I personally, feel that he loves it because it's close to the ground and he can just lay right into it a bit differently than other swings. But at 17 pounds, he's about to outgrow it. Any suggestions for a good swing? There aer so many out there and since this is a huge key in getting any time with him out of arms at night i want to get a good one. There are a ton out there that do so many different settings that it's overwhelming!

Also, is it possible that the cosleeping is causing moer issues? Would he possibly wake less if we put him in the playcrib with the bassinett right next to our bed? DD#2 could NOT cosleep but she would scream bloody murder till laid in her crib next to my bed, around 9 months that ended and she cued to come into our bed which was fine. But im curious if maybe my light and restless sleep being on watch for him waking up, is in fact setting him off more so? General question to anyone, sorry it just popped into my head!

 

Originally Posted by memz 

Big   I know how hard it can be.... My DD id almost 11 months and still waking every hour or so. But I was just thinking, if swaddling works you could get the woombie...that worked for us from about 5 months to 9 months....here's the link http://www.thewoombie.com/ 

Going to check it out, thank you. Do they have any with cutouts for arms?

MAkes me think I could just have my mom sew up one for me?

 

Originally Posted by littlemizflava 

i would do a total elimination for 2 weeks and see if he improves. there is still something making hims sick. formula is not the answer because it is easier to cut out foods when breastfeeding. from experence i would cut out all dairy products and beef.

swaddle with a huge sheet. just place dc off center wrap one side as you would normally then do the other side but bring it all the way under them. this helps to pin it and keep them in it. lol i did this to my ds alot when he was smaller, as he got older not so much but sometimes he just needed it. did it till he was about 2.

i know my ds had reflux and needed to nurse alot at night. his reflux went hand in hand with allergies. for bathing have you tried taking a bath with him at night? if you have a seat or even lie him on the floor while you quickly wash then bring him in, wash him, then have a soak together. my trick was my 2 would always get sleepy and nurse and fall asleep in the bath i would bring them out sleeping. wrap them up dry me off then get them ready for bed and nurse them back to sleep

i am sending 's cause i am a single mom of 2 and i know how hard it was with my ds all alone.

Right now my diet is nonexistant. I have zero dairy (i'm allergic already, so havent had it really ever since he was born) and beef. That's my normal diet as i can't handle beef or dairy myself. I was reminded by a few friends that there can be dairy in things without me knowing, so i had to cut out a few more things that i didnt realize (lunch meat for one since it has lactate or tose or something in it, can't remember off the top of my head).

That's a great suggestion with the sheet. I will do that tonight! Thank you for the very cheap suggestion! I have not done bathing with him, ironically. He's the only kid who i haven't, mostly from just not having the time and my bathing is a strictly needs basis. And he always wants to nurse in the shower or bath and them i'm a bigger mess coming out then going in lol! But i may try him and i taking nightly baths together, doesn't hurt to try and goodness knows i could use a warm bath every night :)

Originally Posted by Tattooed Hand 

I agree with the above poster. My DD has been REALLY high needs her whole life. But as she has gotten more and more mobile, this has gotten easier. She has a very sensitive digestion and was really "colicky." I first cut out dairy, and that helped, but a couple of weeks later, I cut out all the top allergens (corn, wheat, soy, dairy, nuts, eggs,  for 3 weeks, and rotated each back in individually. She reacted to all of them. I don't think giving her formula is the answer, especially because alot of people who have sensitivities to dairy also have them to soy. I would cut them out of your diet and see if there is an improvement. There was for us. The ladies in the allergies forum have lots of info and great recipies.

That said, it's HARD. I could basically only eat rice, beans, veggies and meat. And I had to make everything from scratch that I put in my mouth. But I've slowly been adding things back in.

My DD is sensitive to everything though, it's not just her digestion. Sound, teething, milestones, you name it. When we moved over the summer she cried when ever I used the tape gun unless she was on my back, so I had to pack up our whole apartment with a baby strapped to my back. She would FREAK (I mean hour long inconsolable crying) if anyone but DH or I touched her or even looked at her too closely from months 3-5. But you know what, she grew out of it. Now she's cautious, but generally OK with other people. She also has been more open to DH holding her and even (lately) walking her to sleep starting slowly from 6 months onward. It gets easier, mama, hang in there. Her sleep also SUCKED. She woke up every 30-120 minutes all night long for 5 months. But since she has started walking about a month ago, I am getting a 4-6 hour stretch once a night and 2 hour blocks the rest of the night (it feels like alot compared to the previous months). Some things that helped us were blackout curtins (if they are too expensive, put tin foil over the bedroom window), a white noise machine (or a fan pointing at the wall), a humidifier, special mellow sleep music (and other such rituals). And we wear her alot.

I know how hard it is. I can't tell you how many times I've had fantasies about weaning her, Ferberizing her, or even just going out and getting a cheeseburger, checking into a hotel and sleeping for a week. Hang in there, mama. You are a superhero. It will get easier. Just try to get as much sleep as you can, when ever you can.

PS - DD never let us swaddle her. She would scream bloody murder until we let her out. It did help us to switch sleeping arrangements at around 9 months. She now sleeps in a twin bed next to our bed (beds are on the floor) and I scootch over and nurse her when she wakes up. Having the extra room to squirm around in, undisturbed by the movement of adults seems to have helped her sleep better.

You described me as a child, and my oldest. I believe she has major SPD and DS seems so much like her that i'm wondering if aside from allergies this is also the beginning of SPD. Honestly, i'm not sure why this is getting to me so badly. DD#1 did this until 18 months, and then she only would sleep in 4 hour stretches until 4. At 7 she still doesn't sleep through the night, but only wakes up once or twice with bad dreams. You'd think i'd know this is par for the course. But my brain wants to fix it and i simply may not be able to. Once i accepted that I couldn't change DD#1, it was a lot easier on me. I think i've started that process, it's why i'm trying to nap when and if i can with DS and let things like housework go to heck in a handbasket.

As far as my diet, i've done the best I can. Right now I can eat chicken (organic, cooked from scratch by boiling it in water), carrots, tomatoes, spaghetti sauce (from scratch), pickles,boiled potatoes, avacado, applesauce (from scratch again),  occassional chili from scratch. The rice upsets my stomach and the brown rice seems to give him gas. I'm really ready to stop by In N Out and just get the biggest burger they make, funny since i hate beef. But that's how fed up i am with this diet!!! I'm honestly not sure what else to cut out of my diet at this point, as I feel like i'm getting nothing. And i only have avacadoes, applesauce and chili on rare occassion and notice no change in his stools on those days. Most days he has constant explosive, runny, mucousy stools. And I wont do soy, that's a no go in my house.  Shhh, don't tell my sister since she's married to a soy farmer! I will check out the allergy forums, thank you for the tip. I just started back on posting here, so need to take some time to do that and look for more info and advice!

 

Originally Posted by THBVsMommy 

Could it be lactose overload? I noticed you mentioned hyperlactation in your OP. Here's a wonderful article of lactose intolerance (primary & secondary) and lactose overload.

http://www.breastfeeding.asn.au/bfinfo/lactose.html

From what i read (haven't read your article yet, off to do it as soon as i'm done typing since DS is done sitting for the time being), block feeding should help with this. Also, it's suppose to be outgrown by 5 months of age. But it's initially what i thought of when i read it a few nights ago. But i've been doing the block feeding for months now. ??
 

Originally Posted by matey 

Originally Posted by Tattooed Hand 

I agree with the above poster. My DD has been REALLY high needs her whole life. But as she has gotten more and more mobile, this has gotten easier. She has a very sensitive digestion and was really "colicky." I first cut out dairy, and that helped, but a couple of weeks later, I cut out all the top allergens (corn, wheat, soy, dairy, nuts, eggs,  for 3 weeks, and rotated each back in individually. She reacted to all of them. I don't think giving her formula is the answer, especially because alot of people who have sensitivities to dairy also have them to soy. I would cut them out of your diet and see if there is an improvement. There was for us. The ladies in the allergies forum have lots of info and great recipies.

That said, it's HARD. I could basically only eat rice, beans, veggies and meat. And I had to make everything from scratch that I put in my mouth. But I've slowly been adding things back in.

My DD is sensitive to everything though, it's not just her digestion. Sound, teething, milestones, you name it. When we moved over the summer she cried when ever I used the tape gun unless she was on my back, so I had to pack up our whole apartment with a baby strapped to my back. She would FREAK (I mean hour long inconsolable crying) if anyone but DH or I touched her or even looked at her too closely from months 3-5. But you know what, she grew out of it. Now she's cautious, but generally OK with other people. She also has been more open to DH holding her and even (lately) walking her to sleep starting slowly from 6 months onward. It gets easier, mama, hang in there. Her sleep also SUCKED. She woke up every 30-120 minutes all night long for 5 months. But since she has started walking about a month ago, I am getting a 4-6 hour stretch once a night and 2 hour blocks the rest of the night (it feels like alot compared to the previous months). Some things that helped us were blackout curtins (if they are too expensive, put tin foil over the bedroom window), a white noise machine (or a fan pointing at the wall), a humidifier, special mellow sleep music (and other such rituals). And we wear her alot.

I know how hard it is. I can't tell you how many times I've had fantasies about weaning her, Ferberizing her, or even just going out and getting a cheeseburger, checking into a hotel and sleeping for a week. Hang in there, mama. You are a superhero. It will get easier. Just try to get as much sleep as you can, when ever you can.

I agree. I also did a total elimination diet and was eating only a handful of foods. It sucked but I am glad I went that route. Like the pp, my ds was sensitive (ok, still is) to everything. Sound, light, teething. He breaks out from  everything. We do selective vaxing and one shot cripples him liked you wouldn't believe. When he was little he would get sick and run these amazingly high fevers. He has just had a lot of issues. Including being sensitive to tape guns!! :lol 

Anyway, I know it is rough, but I just really believe that if I would have put my son on formula his problems would have been worse. I don;t think his delicate system would have responded well.

OP, have you visited the allergy boards on here? So many helpful mamas who understand and can help. Was you dc premature?

No, i'll be visiting soon! No, ds was not premature. LOL! You'd think he was! But instead he was 10 days overdue and a healthy weight of 9 lbs.

 

[lrgs]

If he hates having his arms swaddled what about a Woombie? My DD will not sleep without  one (I've tried and it results in a lot of screaming....actually tried it for a nap this afternoon and it was a disaster). We were swaddling her with a velcro swaddling blanket but she got out of those no problem........we even tried a double swaddle and she escaped. The Woombie's allow her to move her arms and she can actually still suck on her hands through the material. They are a little pricey but worth it for my sanity. She sometimes naps for 1.5-2 hours in them and the "nap" I just tried without one lasted only 10 minutes.

[matey]

Solaray Baby me Now probiotics are allergen free and pocket book friendly. I know there is another kind, Kirkmans, that is allergy free but very pricey. We could never afford them

I think getting DH to take your ds out for a walk is a great idea. It would be good for you to get some sleep. When I had my first i thought every new mom felt the way I did. i couldn't understnad how new moms were allowed to do things like operate cars and deal with other humans. I just felt too crazy to do so. i later learned that not everyone feels that way and now with my 2nd I realize how much better I feel as compared to how I felt with my son. Sleep deprivation makes people nuts. It is so important for you to get a chance to rest. Many hugs to you mama!

[SeattleRain]

AKA Mommy, heres a version of the SwaddleMe that isn't fleece: http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3726432&CAWELAID=406307812 I didn't look if they have other colors. If you're nervous about overheating in the fleece version (I don't know if they sell the knit version in the store), just swaddle him with a diaper. The arms in I think are pretty important.

I love my swing. I got it secondhand, so take a look at Craigslist. I always see a lot there. The swing I got is like this: http://www.target.com/Fisher-Price-Lil-Lamb-Dream-Swing/dp/B0018Z6910/ref=sc_qi_detailbutton

[Shanesmom]

Hugs to you mama. You really are a supermom; i cannot imagine trying to do what you are doing.