Parents Not Allowed Into Homeschool Classes At The Museum - Page 3

[chaoticzenmom]

I don't think it's forcing children to separate, but it may be keeping children out of the class who are not really ready for the class.  I homeschool and love spending all day with my kids, but I also value having other role-models in their lives.  I get to pick those role models and if they're not working for my child, then I move on.  I don't homeschool them and sign them up for classes so I can control every single situation and make it exactly what I want.  If I don't like it, I find something I do like.  If my 5yo doesn't want to be without me, then I'll find something for him that accommodates that.  I would ask him to try it first and then if he doesn't feel comfortable, I would wait for awhile and try again.  I want to show my children that I trust them to handle the situation.

Even in my 10yo's middle school class science class, I see parents doing things for their 10-14yo's.  Really?  Your child can't cut a piece of paper or use a hole punch???  The teacher is very active and knows how to engage the kids and he tells them step by step how to do the experiments and make the models.  Still, the parents are there, doing the stuff for the kids.  Drives me insane.  I enjoy sitting in the class because the teacher is so funny.  I sit quietly in the back because it's allowed.  I would be fine (even happy) with them kicking us out of the class. 

If it were a Waldorf class that didn't want an early academic class, I'd expect them to not sign up for an academic class...not to make the class less academic.  Or not to take an organized tour if they really want to go at their own pace.  I don't go on organized tours very often for that reason. 

I think that if you let the museum know that you are not signing up for the class because you're uncomfortable with the policy, that will lead them to either change the policy or not.  I often write emails and call the local YMCA to let them know what I like, dislike, would like to see in their classes.  Often, I find that what I want is on the next session.  We've had classes where we, as parents, have moved all of our kids to a different teacher or even facility when we didn't like what was going on...a teacher we found too rough, not disciplined enough, not engaging enough, etc.  When 20 kids suddenly move out of a program, they take notice.

At 5, it's a different story of course.  But if the museum wants the children to be mature enough to be without their parents, that's their call.  I love homeschooling, but I want my kids to have their own, genuine experiences without me there as well. 

I'm surprised at how many people here aren't bothered by helicopter parenting in the class setting. 

[kathymuggle]

Originally Posted by sapphire_chan 

Maybe the problem is that it's a 5-8 class not just a 5 year old class? So the class is really intended for older kids and 5 year olds who happen to be able to handle it. If a kid can't handle the class at 5, the class isn't for them right now and they can come back next year or the year after.

That makes more sense to me.  I must read Op's more carefully.

I still think there is a distinction to be made from discouraged and not allowed.

I would enrol a 5 -8 yr old in classes where parents were discouraged from attending; if a child was not ready fro a drop off I would not enrol the child.

 I would not enrol a young child (whether they are ready or not) if the program draws a very hard line about parents ever being in the room.  If there are issues I expect to be able to observe, for example. 

[kathymuggle]

Originally Posted by chaoticzenmom 
ation.

If it were a Waldorf class that didn't want an early academic class, I'd expect them to not sign up for an academic class...not to make the class less academic.  Or not to take an organized tour if they really want to go at their own pace.  I don't go on organized tours very often for that reason. 

Not if the museum advertised it as a Waldorf program

My understanding from the OP (and I will reread and edit if I am incorrect) is that this is  advertised as a HS program...so yeah I would expect some flexibility to that effect.

It is obviously a different story if you are signing up for a class offered to the general public.

I'm surprised at how many people here aren't bothered by helicopter parenting in the class setting. 

I am not sure wanting to be allowed in (whether you choose to exercise that parental right or not) is automatically helicopter parenting.

Kathy
 

Edited by kathymuggle - 12/19/10 at 2:28pm

[pampered_mom]

Quote:

Originally Posted by kathymuggle 

I am not sure wanting to be allowed in (whether you choose to exercise that parental right or not) is automatically helicopter parenting.

I would agree here.  The whole "helicopter parenting" thing is often used as a reason against homeschooling or at the very least for some sort of focus on "independence."  tbh...my first reaction to that is something like...aren't the majority of the young adults/children that you're referring to in the public school?

[frugalmama]

Originally Posted by pampered_mom 

Quote:

Originally Posted by kathymuggle 

I am not sure wanting to be allowed in (whether you choose to exercise that parental right or not) is automatically helicopter parenting.

I would agree here.  The whole "helicopter parenting" thing is often used as a reason against homeschooling or at the very least for some sort of focus on "independence."  tbh...my first reaction to that is something like...aren't the majority of the young adults/children that you're referring to in the public school?

Agreed!

There are a lot of reasons that a casual bystander might think a parent is a helicopter parent when they really aren't - they are just trying to meet the needs of their specific child. Said child might suffer from unseen disabilities or issues, for one thing.

I've been accused of it myself with my daughter - I always attend and help because 1. She has multiple life threatening food allergies. At 4, she's not going to know to ask was the playdough they are using to make ornaments made from peanut butter {Yes this actually happened at a library event}. 2. She's 4, functioning at the level of a 5 year old - except for motor skills which lag. Yes I cut things for her, poke holes etc with her direction. She cannot do it right now, and gets very frustrated in public when asked to without help, which leads to a meltdown. 3. I want to be sure that what it being taught fits with our family values. I've pulled DD out of storytime before when the story was not one we approved of or I felt age appropriate for HER.

[Kreeblim]

Originally Posted by Marsupialmom 

But I find it completely ok for someone to say if your child can not do ABC then they cannot participate.

Also, your unable to separate child is not the only child in the room. Your presence can be ruining the learning experience of other children  who are more ready for that activity.  

I have to agree with Marsupial mom here, though I also agree with the PP that said some kids just aren't ready at 5, and therefore you aren't automatically a "helicopter parent" for needing to be present for the class of a 5 year old.  We have a Science Center and a History Museum here, both of which offer classes and workshops.  Our  membership gets us into both, and the Science Center offers daily half-hour long workshops that are free and open to parents AND kids, but we tend to avoid those in favor of the pay classes that don't allow parents.  This isn't due to convenience...I can't really go anywhere other than the museum for that 45 minutes, and I'm there so much that I could walk it in my sleep, but the parents in the other classes are SO obnoxious sometimes that I would rather be bored and shell out the cash.  

For example, they answer the questions that the teachers ask.  So the teacher will ask "what are some things that stay in a liquid state at room temperature?"  And the kids will start saying answers as well as the parents, with all the answers that might take a minute to think about coming from parents alone.  Or the teacher might ask "Does anyone know what the three things a fire needs in order to burn?" and they'll whisper answers to their kid, so there is no back-and-forth talking about why an incorrect answer might have SEEMED correct like the teacher will do with the first few answers to get the kids really thinking about it.  Some parents seem to just view it as a competition to get their kid to answer correctly, and others seem to have some kind of attention seeking issue that makes them want to impress people by knowing the answers to questions intended for 6 year olds.  Ugh.  I have actually congratulated parents for being so super duper smart that they knew all the answers in a children's class before the kids did.  

My kids are really happy to be dropped off, and they are 5 and 6.  They know that the class is optional, and that I'll see them when it's over.  With the 5 year old, I actually have to hide during his karate lessons because it is NOT drop off and having me in the room makes him totally unable to focus.  There is just so much waving, and talking and showing off that I stay in the snack room and watch from a distance.  My 6 year old is fine with us at his sports stuff though.  If your kid isn't ready to be alone, then by all means do what you need to do, but I don't fault the museum for the policy, especially since the class is also for older kids.  

Edited by Kreeblim - 12/24/10 at 3:39am

[weliveintheforest]

It would be nice if the parents could at least observe, but I would be fine with leaving my dd.  If it were all day, then I would not, but 45 minutes is something she would be happy to do.