DH won't wear DD - Page 2

[Bebe's Mom]

My DH flatly refused to wear DD in a sling or mei tei or baby bjorn. It's not a guy thing particularly, I have seen lots of manly men wearing baby bjorns, etc. Just a personal decision. He does however, love to put her in the backpack. He will walk around all day with her in there, and has...Ours is a Kelty. He says it is very comfortable. I personally don't like it, it is too heavy for me. But DD loves it because she is up high and can look down on us mortals, lol.. I can't wear her any more, she is too heavy and I have back problems, so this is the perfect solution for when strollers are impractical and we can't let her walk. For example, we went to the RenFest in Crownsville, MD this year, and it was packed!! I swear the place has the only hills in MD, and they are quite steep, so we saw many people struggling to get their strollers up and down the hills and around all the people. And we saw many women carrying the baby while the men pushed the empty stroller, baby not wanting to ride in it anymore. So, all these useless, expensive, heavy EMPTY strollers all over, while DD happily stayed in her backpack. I use a stroller for quick trips to the mall, etc. But if we are going outside and walking around all day, DD goes in the backpack. Have you asked your DH if a backpack is a viable solution?? They can be had cheaply on Craigslist, we got ours for $20 bucks, in excellent shape. BTW Chamomile Girl, great pic!!

[stellamia]

I just bought an Ergo secondhand for my sister for only $50! I'll PM you info. 

My DH is into wearing our kids but I have my mother-in-law to thank for that. DH is the oldest of 8 kids and helped his mom out a lot, including wearing his younger siblings on hikes and while camping. He knows there's nothing sissy-ish about it (I personally think you have to be fairly strong to wear a 20lb child for hours). However, if NOT for growing up and seeing it as normal, I'm guessing he would have been opposed to it. 

I hope a manly looking Ergo will change his mind! GL to you.

[GoBecGo]

Go for a hard hike and comment on how "masculine" he looks letting his woman do all the hard carrying work with a bad back?

Both XP and DP are ok about BW, though DP tends not to do much yet (mainly because DD is still at an age where she wants to nurse a lot in the carrier, and also because he's still a bit self-conscious about it) though he did carry DD1 a lot when she was 2ish years old.  DD1 was HN and XP carried her all the time, from birth, because it was the only thing which helped end her 4+hours of crying every night.  DD2 is so mellow, it's really more of a transport things with her.  We have a maroon kari-me, a royal blue homemade ring-wrap, a royal blue homemade meitai, a red linen homemade ring sling, a navy blue Papoose frame carrier (which she's too small for still) and any number of strips of fabric/scarfs which i'm reduced to using because i CONSTANTLY forget to grab the nearest one whenever we go somewhere in the car).

I guess i'd probably send them out together and let him figure it out.  If he wants to walk 3+ miles carrying a big 15mo in arms that's his affair, just make it clear that 1) it's his turn to transport her and 2) he doesn't get extra slack cut afterwards if he chooses to carry her until his arms are ready to fall off and can't do the dishes like he's supposed to.

[Lauren710]

    Quote:

Originally Posted by Marsupialmom 

Maybe you should leave him with her and letting them figure it out. When you are not around to rescue them both maybe they can figure it out. You go to a different part of the store or a separate walk. Let them learn what works for them and both get use to it. Maybe she will learn to like something different that daddy does.    

Yup I agree with this. I love wearing my DD and find that's often the easiest solution for me to get anything done with a clingy toddler, but my DH is not. interested. at. all. in wearing her, no matter how many times he's seen it work out well for me. Although I think BWing is the greatest thing ever, clearly he doesn't give a flying fig about it - but that's okay. When he's caring for her he still manages just fine :)

[MsFortune]

My DH seemed freaked out by the slings - not sure if they just feel weird on him or if it's a masculinity thing - but he likes the Bjorn.  It's black, it's manly.  

I also didn't really give him a choice.  He had to take care of the baby, and if he wanted to do anything, he needed to wear the Bjorn.  He's mowed the lawn and DJ'd with DS in the Bjorn.