20mo KICKING CONSTANTLY

[AFWife]

I'm at my wits end with this behavior. I have NO idea what to do.

He kicks. All the time. Anytime he's laying down he must be kicking something/one. If I move to the other end of the couch he will scoot down specifically to continue kicking me. I know that someone is going to say "So get off the couch" but sometimes that's not physically possible. (This pregnancy has been really hard on my lower back and sometimes the pain, I guess sciatic pain, is so bad I'm unable to walk. yes, I'm seeing a chiro but we have to pay out of pocket so I can't afford to go more than once every few weeks) Besides, when the new baby gets here I won't be able to jump up and walk off if I'm nursing or something.

The kicking is making cosleeping with this child next to impossible. I haven't spent an entire night IN MY OWN BED in almost a year. I started sleeping on a mattress on the floor while we were night-weaning and it just continued after I got pregnant. Last night he wanted to cuddle with Mommy but I had to get up and sleep on the floor because he wouldn't stop kicking me. I'm not sure if he was awake or asleep. We fight with him to stop kicking each night before bed. It's constant. It's like anytime anything gets near his feet he has to kick.

It's not little kicks, either. It's big, violent ones. I've gotten out of bed mid bedtime routine and walked away in tears and frustration because he kicks my pregnant belly and it's seriously painful.

Right now, I really don't care if it's "age appropriate" or not. It has to stop. I tried a time out today and he screamed for about 10 seconds and then wanted to sit in the Pack-n-Play (where we were doing the time out) and didn't want to get out...but wanted to KICK THE SIDES. He's big enough that he can, if the kicking of the PnP had continued, break the dang thing. Nothing works. He understands "no" and "stop" just fine; we use it other times and he knows. This just seems to be something he's refusing to budge on.

[LynnS6]

Do you own a crib? When our kids hurt us, they were levitated to the crib until I could calm down and deal with them. I confess that it's probably not the most gentle of solutions, but it worked, and it kept both of us safe. It kept me safe from them, but more importantly, it also kept me from overreacting and striking back. (Yes, I know it's immature and not gentle, but it was a sort of knee-jerk reaction that I needed to interrupt. The only way I could interrupt my own reaction was to separate myself from my kids. And the only place that I knew would contain them long enough for me to control my reaction was the crib.)

The other thing that struck me was I wonder if he needs more large motor time and it's a sensory thing. Have you tried weighting down his legs with a heavy blanket? (A weighted blanket might be better, but those can get pricey.) This is not a punishment, but he might need to feel something against his legs to get them to calm down. Our dd is a kicker in her sleep, and she'll press her legs against mine, trying to get her feet inbetween my legs. Needless to say, it doesn't make for very restful sleep!)

Does he have another venue to get the same kind of sensation? He's a perfect age for a mini-trampoline. We got one for $10 on Craigslist that really helped my toddlers. The could bounce to their hearts content and got the large joint compression that seemed to calm them down.

[AFWife]

Lynn: We don't own a crib. Only the PnP.  It probably does have something to do with large motor stimulation, I hadn't thought of that. Currently we're in an apartment with NO yard or space to play and NO park nearby. (And only one car and a DH with early work hours) Not to mention that it's been chilly lately so going outside isn't always possible anyway. Ugh, we're moving the end of this month to a house with a huge yard. Maybe I just have to deal with it until then?

[LynnS6]

Do you own any big pillows? Would you be willing to put a couch cushion down on the floor? in other words -- can you teach him to jump off things? you can also set up an 'obstacle course' in your living room -- a big pillow/couch cushion to climb over (make sure you leave one on the couch so you can sit!) -- put two chars out and spread a blanket over them to make a tunnel to crawl through. Anything to get a bit of movement.
 

[Courtney-Ostaff]

Get him a baby trampoline.  Any time he kicks, he MUST jump on the trampoline. Just make it a rule. It does two things: 1) no kicking elsewhere, and 2) wears his little legs out!

Trampoline can be a mattress on the floor,a ginormous pillow, or an actual trampoline. (my daughter's birthday present)

Consquences for kicking: 1) trampoline.  2) redirection--kick a ball in the living room (slightly deflated beach balls work well, as do nerf balls) Teach him to lay on his back and bicycle in the air.  Do it together: press your feet end to end and practice pushing back and forth.  How many times can he jump? Can he run laps or circles in the house?  My daughter occaisionally just runs in circles in the house. ;)  Is there something/something (aka dog/cat, etc)) he can play tag with? Can you throw a ball and have him fetch it for you?  (silly, i know, but they like it)