Need some help to gently wean

[mommy2two babes]

I can no longer stand the intensity of DSs nursing. I have tried a number of strategies dont offer dont refuse.

Trying to limit nursing to sertain times of the day. limiting the length of nursing sessions weaning cold turkey.. I have been tandem nursing DS1 and DS2 for over a year now and I think DS2 is less demanding for nursing than DS1.

DS I am sure would nurse constantly if I allowed him to. I didn't even get my cycles back until DS1 was over 2 yrs old.

I tandem nursed DD and DS 1 for a year and a half before weaning DD. She was certainly not as stubborn as ds1 with the weaning. Althought she was an avid nurser who nursed until 3 1/2 and did not respect any kind of nursing boundries. We ended up weaning cold turkey and after about a week she gave up and stopped asking for the most part. After DS2 arrived she did nurse a couple more times.

DS1 barely eats even during the time when we have been attempting to wean cold turkey. He has frequent night terrors and  constantly asks to nurse day and night.

I am at a loss what to do with him. When I try to limit in any way he has an all out melt down and seems completely lost.  He also acts out severely.

Any advice would be appreciated. 

[D_McG]

Is this the child who is over 4 y/o?  Ir the child who is 13 mos?

[MittensKittens]

I was just about to post the very same thing. I have no advice, but will be checking back for answers. :)

[mommy2two babes]

This is the child who is over 4.

[MittensKittens]

And D_McG, she's talking about the 4 yo :)

[MittensKittens]

Oops, that's a load of cross posting!

[maddymama]

Does the 4 year old have any known food sensitivities/intolerances/allergies?  Is he nursing alot because it's what he can handle?

Are you replacing nursing sessions with other positive interactions?  Does he want to nurse to connect with you?

Good luck!

~maddymama

[mommy2two babes]

I suspect a possible dairy allergy.

He was really sensitive to it when he was younger.For the first year I had to completely cut it out of my diet. DS2 is the same.

It figures because cream cheese was one of few things I could actually count on him eating any amount of besides junk I would rather him not have at all.

We still cosleep and snuggle lots but DS1 never is satisfied with just a snuggle. he wants nanas too.

 He also asks why  ds2 can have nanas on demand .He asks specifically for nanas milk but says it is yucky out of a cup. (I know I have a lipase issue with pumped milk.)

He has always been what I would consider high needs and would never take a bottle, soother or even really a sippy cup until he was about 18 mos. about the same time he really showed any interest in eating anything.

[D_McG]

hmm - a 4 year old with that level of anxiety and who doesn't eat much would have me worried.  At that age (I have a child that age) I'd expect them to be more flexible.  Is he delayed in other areas too?  Has he ever been evaluated?