people giving plastic toys thinking they're doing your child a favor? - Page 2

[Plarka]

I appreciate all that we received, even if I didn't personally like it. I find it hilarious that people here assumed that I or anyone else ranting here wasn't grateful. I have a personal daily gratitude practice! I never said a negative thing to the grandparents who gave us gifts that I would rather my son not have, and instead ranted here- to other mamas that may understand. That is partially what this community is for- to have a space to be heard when most of the world out there doesn't understand our choices. So nagging people for ranting here seems counter-productive to me.

What she said!
 

[Tanka]

My short input wasn't meant to nag, I'm sorry that some may have responded that way...Personally, i believe that ranting, regardless if its done online or in person, still has an effect on ourselves and those around us.   

But i think this excerpt from  the journal Lillipoh, (Fall 2010) adds an interesting perspective to this conversation.

"Her story reminds me that it is easy to make value judgments about certain toys without paying close attention to the significant, unique meaning and value they may have for the child...helped by the imagination, manufactured toys can and do serve as useful objects for the child.  A colleague, Janet Klaar, spoke of her four year old granddaughter's use of a pink plastic toy mobile phone, which had been bought for her as a gift. It had a noisy buzzer and a tinny voice, which rattled-off a series of prerecorded responses when it first arrived. Naturally, it captivated the child. Some time later, with Granny's help, the batteries wore down. At the this point, the toy gained new life. One of the child's conversations to the now silent, but infinitely more interesting phone, went as follows:

Hello Emily

Now can you tell me which is the fastest light bulb in the world?

(pause as she listened for the answer)

Thank you

And the time here is half past eleven nine ten.

Like her mother, she carries her phone around everywhere and uses it frequently...it remains a manufactured replica of a real thing but is no obstacle to her fantasy.  She has made it her own and turned it into a very satisfactory toy. 

What we see and what the child experiences may be two different things and when a child turns up in a kindergarten with an 'undesirable' toy, it is important to be able to see beyond what the toy is and what it has become."

[Astrid1024]

Tanka - I am so happy you took the time to type this part out from the article. I thought immediately of this article when I read this thread. While I can commiserate with how frustrating it is to sometimes have our efforts as parents actively thwarted - especially when the thwarting comes in the guise of what should be an act of generosity and love, I know that my son has had some fabulous moments of play with items I would have never purchased for him myself. I am grateful that those gifts were always given with the best intentions and I am also always grateful for the happiness they bring him. If the toy breaks, we dispose of it. When it is no longer played with, we pass it on.

I recommend the whole article for those who subscribe to Lilipoh. It's a great anthroposophic journal that always has at least two or three thought provoking articles.