I'm sorry you haven't gotten any replies...
But you keep on doing what you are doing...and perhaps, if you felt like it, research all you can on Attachment Theory and know that your feelings and wishes are backed by a LOT of research. Continue to read Mothering.com
Read up more about how interference with attachment can create anxiety disorders in children. I have some excerpts from some published scientific journals here.
Society doesn't FORCE you to give up what you believe is best for your children. You simply think THEIR opinion is more important than your own. It's not.
Research all you can about the benefits of tandem nursing and attachment parenting.
Ask Dr Sears 7 Benefits of Attachment Parenting
The psychological benefits of co-sleeping
See if there are local groups of La Leche League to join in NZ. You ought to find other co-sleeping, APing, breastfeeding mamas there. And if there is no local chapter, see if they can help you start one up!