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What will happen at the birth??

post #1 of 33
Thread Starter 

So I am guessing my pregnancy irrational worries are getting the best of me but, I am so afraid that my baby will be circumcised without my consent after I give birth. My logical brain knows this is nuts but, I would like some reassurance. Dh and I are just so against circumcision for our child and I just want to better understand how it is handled at the hospital.

 

For those of you that had hospital births and did not Circumcise, what goes on at the hospital? Do they ask you what your plans are? Do you have to sign any documents in order to get the procedure or is it a routine thing that could happen if you don't say you don't want it?

 

 I plan to talk to my midwife about it as I get closer but I have Kaiser Insurance so I don't know that my regular midwife will be the person that delivers me with DD I got the on call doctor that I had never met before.

 

Thank you Rainbow.gif

 

Megan

 

post #2 of 33

Your location says you are in california.  Cali has a prtty low circumcision rate, that is in your favor.  I don't have any experience with hospital birth so I can't comment specifically about that.  My advice is to carefully read the consent form that you sign for yourself and line through anything you are not in agreement with for yourself.  Read over all the consent material for your baby and make sure you are super clear IN WRITING that you do not consent to circumcision.

I would not let the baby out of the immediate sight of either you or your husband.

 

If you've not taken the time to come to a clear decision on the other newborn interventions such as vit K injection, application of eye antibiotics and hep B vaccination, you'll need to look into those things as well.  Remember, nurses can get caught up in their usual routine.  If you are going to refuse some or all of the above, you should be prepared to voice those refusals verbally and more than once.

post #3 of 33

I had a hospital birth with my intact DS. Luckily they only asked me once if I wanted him circ'd and I wrote NO CIRC in HUGE letters over and over on the consent form. I also told the nurses several times that if anyone went near his penis, I'd sue them all so fast they wouldn't know what hit them (I was a bit crabby after a less than ideal birth scenario). You can write "no circumcision" with a marker on the disposable diapers and also on an index card to attach to the baby bassinet. Everyone I've talked to that had a boy said they had a consent form with a yes or no on it. I don't trust those though, which is why I got very vocal about my wishes.

 

Congrats on your intact baby boy! I'm having a boy too. joy.gif

post #4 of 33

I got asked by every. nurse. that came in my room (DS1 and DS2 were born at the hospital). It was annoying. I didn't let him leave the room without either me or DH with him. And I also second the idea of writing No Circ on his diapers and on an index card on his crib.

post #5 of 33

Many women tour the hospital L&D unit before birth.  Can you go through a tour and ask at that time what their routines and policies are on circumcision?  You may find they see a lot of non-circ parents, and do not have issues with pressuring people into a decision.  Circ rates are very low in the west, they probably won't find you unusual in your request to keep your son intact. 

 

I'm in Arizona, where the circ rate is down to 25%.  There are two hospitals in my area that actually do not do routine circ at all - people have arrange circumcision with their doctor privately at a different hospital if this is what they choose.  Find out how your hospital does things as you pick your battles.  You may have a harder time refusing Hep B and Vit K injections (if this is your choice) than refusing circ.

post #6 of 33

I had the same concern when I was pregnant with my son. There are so many random papers you have to sign, and I was afraid I would accidentally consent to circumcision by not clearly reading through all the documents or that they would consider it standard care and just go ahead and do it.

 

It first came up when I came to the hospital in labor. They were asking me basic questions and entering it into a computer that was next to my bed. One of the questions was whether I wanted to have my son circumcised. I said "no, I don't think so" and the nurse just said "no" to confirm it and entered it on her computer. I don't know why but that weekend two different pediatricians came to look at him and asked if I wanted him circumcised. So I was asked 3 times during the hospital stay!

 

All hospitals are different, but from my experience they make sure you want it done and don't just do it. I'd still be cautious and make sure they know your wishes from the beginning.

post #7 of 33
The idea of writing no circ on the diapers is a great one that way if you are napping and they come to take him without telling you then there is that backup. Also a little sign on the bassinet next to the name card is good. Read every thing before you sign it making sure nothing gets signed you dont want.

The very best way though is when he leaves your room your dh or someone you trust goes with him and he is watched. Make sure that anyone that takes him out is told we do not consent to circ also so you are covered there if you must let him go to the nursery alone. Never take it for granted they wouldnt do it without asking because there have been boys done by mistake. Dosnt happen a lot but it is possible so take precautions and dont feel bad or shy about it.

Sometimes a baby has to spend time in the nursery because of an issue if that happens then definitely do the sign and the diapers.
post #8 of 33

call the hospital you will be delivering at and ask *them* what is their procedure and policy regarding circumcision.

 

around here, they need the mother's signature in order to do it.

 

look out, the OBs may come after you when you are groggy to solicit it from you. (i was hit up for it at 7 am following a 1 am birth). be prepared to say "no circumcision" a lot.

 

tell your midwife that you do not want your son circumcised and ask her to mark your file as such.

 

anytime you have an appointment with another doctor, remind them of your wishes and ask them to mark your file, too.

 

and my number one piece of advice on this subject is to keep your baby with you at all times in the hospital. ask for all newborn procedures to be done in your room -- hearing test, weighing, etc. etc. if he ever "has" to leave the room, go with him. hospitals do stuff at all sorts of weird hours. as each new nurse comes on shift and stops by to take your vitals, etc. -- ask her (or him) what is going to happen in the next few hours, and then plan your time around it. if you hear that a weighing of baby is on deck for overnight, find out approximately what time and figure on waking up with him for that, or ask if it could possibly be done before you got to sleep.

 

cosleep with your baby in the hospital bed, then you will know that he is always nice and safe snuggled in next to you.

post #9 of 33

Just write NO CIRCUMCISION on any paper they want you to sign about newborn procedures. Mention it to the nurses, doctors, anyone who enters the room. Maybe make a sign to put on the plastic box they use for newborns. Thankfully, the hospital I transferred to did not perform circumcisions so I didn't have to worry about it.

Also, once the baby is born, don't let him out of your sight. My DH went with our son for any checkups and he roomed in with me. He was never out of our sight.

post #10 of 33

A baby boy was recently cut in Florida against his parents wishes and with NO checked on the unsigned consent form.  I would never let the baby out of someones sight for starters, tell every person that walks in the room (even if it's an orderly) that no one is to touch your son's genitals.  I would go one step further than writing on the diaper (they get thrown away) I would write just below the baby's umbilical stump!

post #11 of 33

We just never let our boys that were born at a hospital out of our sight.  They can do everything they need to do in your room.  The nurses wanted to do the NB exam at the nursery, so I just insisted on coming with them to watch.  We also wrote "no circ" on every diaper.

post #12 of 33

Our entire birth plan was this:

- No eye ointment

- No vitamin K shot

- No hepatitis B vaccine

- No circumcision

 

We made the font nice and big, printed out a dozen copies, and it was dh's job to hand them out to all the doctors and nurses who would have anything to do with ds.  He never left our hospital room for a second, though if he had, dh or I would have gone with him.  In all the forms I signed, I didn't even see a circ consent form; my guess is they just didn't give me one after seeing our birth plan.  We were asked a few times if we were going to, but it was more in the spirit of they didn't want to check our chart right then, rather than they wanted to whisk ds away if I so much as hesitated.

 

I had a drug-free birth and was only on ibuprofen afterward, and despite being severely sleep-deprived, I woke up every single time someone came in to our room.  Even if I had accidentally signed a consent form, it wouldn't have happened.  My experience may be different from those mamas' who needed pain meds during recovery though.

post #13 of 33
Thread Starter 

Thanks for all the replys. Luckily, all procedures are done in the room with me and they do not remove the baby unless there is an emergency. I don't plan on letting anyone take my baby out of my site, no way!! I like the idea of writing it down on the diaper and on a card. I am going to call the hospital and ask what their routine is. Great Advice!

 

I guess you ladies are right, if I am there at all times, then it shouldn't be an issue as far as them being able to preform the circ but, I am afraid that the doctor or nurse could try to retract or something. I am going to write in big bold letter....DO NOT TOUCH THE PENIS!!! LOL That is the difficult thing about having Kaiser, I am always having to fight with my dd ped about vaccinations, flu shots and all that other stuff. I am sure that not having a circ child will be a whole new issue at every appt. I think I need to look around and find a different doctor for them. Well, being that my husband is intact and feels as strongly as I do about it I am glad I will have two of us keeping a look out!!

 

I will also have to call the hospital and find out if I can sign paper work before I go into labor. I plan to labor at home as long as possible so by the time I get to the hospital I doubt I will be able to focus on what I am signing, I will have to make DH in charge of that. Gosh, I am frusterated that Circ is so common that those of us that do not wish to do this to our child need to be so worried about it! It should be the other way around!!!!

 

I can't imagine what that family in Florida is feeling! It makes me feel like crying.

 

Well, Thank you all. I am sure I will be visiting this board more often now love.gif

 

Megan

post #14 of 33
Thread Starter 

Oh my I forgot they give the Hep B right away too. Wow, I have a lot to look into!!

 

Thank you love.gif

post #15 of 33

its considered an elective procedure even by the AAP so I really this there not going to do it without your consent I mean it not like a shot if your worried about heb B and such I would be way more assertive

post #16 of 33

I would also make it clear to anyone who asks if you want to cut up your baby that it is completely unethical to solicit cosmetic surgery...especially on a newborn

post #17 of 33

What's wrong with those other things you listed? I haven't done any research on those and didn't know they were a problem.

 

I had an epidural with both my kids and was still aware any time someone came into the room. I was "all there" in labor as well. Sometimes epidurals get a bad rep, but they caused no problems for me. My labors were smooth, and my kids were healthy and learned to nurse just fine. I saw no reason to suffer any more than I had to.

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by outlier View Post

Our entire birth plan was this:

- No eye ointment

- No vitamin K shot

- No hepatitis B vaccine

- No circumcision

 

We made the font nice and big, printed out a dozen copies, and it was dh's job to hand them out to all the doctors and nurses who would have anything to do with ds.  He never left our hospital room for a second, though if he had, dh or I would have gone with him.  In all the forms I signed, I didn't even see a circ consent form; my guess is they just didn't give me one after seeing our birth plan.  We were asked a few times if we were going to, but it was more in the spirit of they didn't want to check our chart right then, rather than they wanted to whisk ds away if I so much as hesitated.

 

I had a drug-free birth and was only on ibuprofen afterward, and despite being severely sleep-deprived, I woke up every single time someone came in to our room.  Even if I had accidentally signed a consent form, it wouldn't have happened.  My experience may be different from those mamas' who needed pain meds during recovery though.

post #18 of 33

DS was born in San Luis Obispo and it was no biggie - the peds asked for circ but that was not too bad... We never left DS alone. He was with us at all times. He was with me 99%, and DH went with the nurse to do the newborn screening, bilirubin check and hearing screening. I started out with Kaiser, and they have so much paperwork, I think you can ask now to have the waivers signed for things you don't want. In SLO I just signed a paper no thank you to vitamin K and eye ointment. I didn't even have to sign anything for HepB, since the peds on call do that and they bring a separate form. However, I don't know how Kaiser handles that, I left at 16 weeks... So ask now, they are so organized, it's good to maybe get it done now. Then bring your birth plan and make sure your son is never left alone!

 

post #19 of 33

When we had our son 2 years ago, I had to sign a refusal of consent for vitamin k and eye ointment. On the same page, there was an "other" space. I wrote in all capital letters, "NO BATH, NO HEP B, NO CIRCUMCISION." Baby was with us from the moment he was removed from my body (dreaded c-section), and it was never even brought up.

post #20 of 33
Quote:
Originally Posted by drs0410 View Post

What's wrong with those other things you listed? I haven't done any research on those and didn't know they were a problem.

 

I had an epidural with both my kids and was still aware any time someone came into the room. I was "all there" in labor as well. Sometimes epidurals get a bad rep, but they caused no problems for me. My labors were smooth, and my kids were healthy and learned to nurse just fine. I saw no reason to suffer any more than I had to.

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by outlier View Post

Our entire birth plan was this:

- No eye ointment

- No vitamin K shot

- No hepatitis B vaccine

- No circumcision

 



They aren't necessarily a problem.  They are routine newborn procedures in hospitals.  However, some people opt out of these based on their understanding of the purposes of these routines.

 

Eye ointment (I think its erythromycin) is an antibiotic given to prevent the transmission of gonorrhea from mother to infant.  It is very necessary when it is unclear whether mom has gonorrhea but if mom knows she is disease free, she can opt out of the eye ointment for her baby with no dire consequences.

 

Vitamin K helps prevent excessive bleeding in rare cases, but since most healthy full-term babies are not at risk of bleeding issues, some moms opt out of the injection.

 

The Hep B vaccine is effective at helping prevent Hep B transmission from mom to baby if given within 12 hours of the birth.  But again, if mom does not have Hep B, there is no purpose in giving the vaccine to a newborn.

 

Unfortunately, hospitals are not generally used to people who refuse the "standard" care, and many moms consent to these procedures without having a full understanding of what they are for. 

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