As of late, mine has been, "choose the path of least resistance".
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Do you have a parenting motto?post #1 of 8012/18/10 at 10:58amThread Starterpost #2 of 8012/18/10 at 11:05am
I have two. The first is "You don't have to be the best, just good enough." I'm a perfectionist and that causes stress for me and the kids.
The other is the title of a book I saw long ago, "Don't sweat the small stuff...and it's all small stuff." Sometimes it's so hard to keep things in perspective!
OP, my second motto often leads me to your motto!post #3 of 8012/18/10 at 11:15ampost #4 of 8012/18/10 at 11:23ampost #5 of 8012/18/10 at 11:24ampost #6 of 8012/18/10 at 11:28ampost #7 of 8012/18/10 at 12:37pmpost #8 of 8012/18/10 at 1:22pmpost #9 of 8012/18/10 at 5:40pmpost #10 of 8012/18/10 at 5:52pm
I've got a couple, most of them given to me by others:
My dad, when my first was born: "I always found the intro to Dr. Spock very comforting: 'Trust yourself -- you know more than you think you do.'"
My dad, again when the first was a baby: "A little benign neglect never hurt anyone"
(Meaning: don't be too fast to jump in when they're playing, figuring things out, working things out. Let them learn to self-amuse, problem solve, etc. Still applies as they get older - don't insert yourself into their business all the time out of some kind of "but they NEEEEEEED me to do this." It never meant, in our parlance, to ignore them and leave them unsupported, but just to give them the time and space to be themselves and figure things out if they can).
A friend from grad school: "Tsk! No lying to children or animals!"
(The pets were good practice. You don't need to say "Cats don't like ice cream!" when you can say "Ice cream makes you projectile vomit, silly cat!"
Another friend: "Is this the hill I want to die on?"
(Variant of "pick your battles.")post #11 of 8012/18/10 at 6:46pmpost #12 of 8012/19/10 at 1:23am
Keep her alive until she is 18.
Not sure that is really a motto but it helps me to remember some days that my job is not to give dd everything in the universe, bake her cookies and be her most beloved buddy. My job is to give her shelter, food and teach her how to care for herself as best I can. And I'm doing that.post #13 of 8012/19/10 at 2:06ampost #14 of 8012/19/10 at 2:14ampost #15 of 8012/19/10 at 5:03ampost #16 of 8012/19/10 at 5:14ampost #17 of 8012/19/10 at 11:00ampost #18 of 8012/19/10 at 11:15ampost #19 of 8012/19/10 at 11:18ampost #20 of 8012/19/10 at 12:30pm
Great thread OP.
Mine is "Doesn't matter. When he is 21, he will be lying on a couch, saying he wants to kill his father and sleep with his mother."
Meaning, no matter how well I do, my DS/DD are going to think some of the things I did were wrong. And some of the things will be wrong, but it will have been good enough. So I might as well cut myself some slack. I'm very hard on myself I sometimes over analyze things, so sometimes it's good to step back and accept how things are and even laugh about it a bit.
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