Small victory: learning not to yell

[Monkey Keeper]

My husband is MUCH better at GD than I am.  He feels no compulsion to raise his voice and reacts logically rather than emotionally.  Lately, he has been encouraging me to work on managing my reactions to our children's behavior, and this morning I had a small victory!

Last night, I left my wedding rings on the end table in the living room. Until this point, my girls have left my things alone.  Today, though, my 4.5yo DD decided to wear my rings around the house while playing.  When I got up (DH let me sleep in with the baby while he tended to the girls), I found my engagement ring on the kitchen counter.  My wedding band was nowhere to be found.  

Instead of freaking out, yelling and *acting* angry with my DD, I calmly told her (several times ;) ) how upset I was that she touched my things without permission and how terribly sad I would be if we could not find the ring.

My DH and I looked for the ring.  DD who misplaced it had a choice to help (which she did for a while) or to sit quietly (rather than playing) while we were looking.  I went to talk with her once the ring was found as she had chosen to sit rather than help by that time. I got on her level, told her we found the ring, and explained to her again that it upset me that she played with my things without permission and was careless with them.  I explained, calmly, how *her* actions made *me* feel.  It felt good!

Better yet, she apologized spontaneously and gave me a huge hug. Later she came up, hugged me, and told me, "Mommy, I love you more than anyone."

So I'm counting that as a small victory!

[BFandHS]

This is actually a rather large victory.    Keep up the good work.