Transitioning 2-year-old to own room/toddler bed

[filiadeluna]

My DD is 21 months old.  She sleeps in her sidecarred crib next to our bed, nurses to sleep, and nurses 2-3 additional times at night (more if she's teething).  She is pretty high needs and always has been.  I do love a lot of things about cosleeping - not having to get out of bed, knowing that she is safe, waking up next to her smiling face, etc.  That being said, I think that around the time she turns 2 at the end of March, I will be ready to transition her to her own room and bed. 

I am hoping to get pregnant next year, and remembering how uncomfortable sleeping was for before, I would prefer to not have her in the bed with me most of the time by then.  I know there will be nights when she just can't sleep without me, and that's fine.  Also, DH has been opposed to cosleeping this entire time, and I have fought tooth and nail with him to keep her in our room.  We do not get much time alone (let alone much time for intimacy).  DH gets home from work at 10:30pm.  DD stays up as late as 1am/2am most nights (at which point I am generally exhausted myself), wakes up around 10am, and takes her one nap when DH is at work.

Anyway, I'm thinking about leaving the crib where it is next to our bed (for really rough nights and also for a future sibling), and buying a separate toddler bed or mattress for DD's room.  She will sometimes fall asleep on me while nursing in the rocking chair, and I am able to put her down on her nap mat there (it's one of those preschool nap mats).  She will sleep for about 1-2 hours there, then wake to nurse again, and then sleep again for another 2-3 hours or so.  So, if I get another bed, I could easily rock her to sleep, put her down in bed for awhile, pick her back up, nurse her to sleep, etc.  I just wonder if she would still wake up a couple of more times to nurse before morning, or if she would sleep more? 

We don't have a monitor b/c she has always slept with us, but we have a pretty small house.  I do prefer to hear her stir/fuss a little though, rather than her having to scream to wake me.  So... would you suggest one if I were to do this in a few months, or is it a waste of money?  I'm also a little paranoid about her waking up in the morning before I do and hurting herself on her some of her toys or furniture.

Sorry for the long post.  Any advice/suggestions/experiences?

[PiggyPiggyOinkOink]

How about starting with a toddler bed in your room? Next to your bed. That way, she's used to sleeping by herself in it, with you close by if she needs you, but not sleeping crammed up next to you. Try this for a few weeks, being consistent about her sleeping in it, and then move it to her room. By then maybe she'll be used to sleeping in it, enjoy it, and not mind so much.

We are going through the same thing with our 3.5 year old son, and hope to have him sleeping in his own room by summer before the new baby comes. We plan to make sure he has bedding in his favorite characters and make a big deal out of how cool and awesome it is. Does your DD have any characters she likes? You can find almost anything for kids' rooms nowadays. Good luck!

[filiadeluna]

Originally Posted by PiggyPiggyOinkOink 

How about starting with a toddler bed in your room? Next to your bed. That way, she's used to sleeping by herself in it, with you close by if she needs you, but not sleeping crammed up next to you. Try this for a few weeks, being consistent about her sleeping in it, and then move it to her room. By then maybe she'll be used to sleeping in it, enjoy it, and not mind so much.

We are going through the same thing with our 3.5 year old son, and hope to have him sleeping in his own room by summer before the new baby comes. We plan to make sure he has bedding in his favorite characters and make a big deal out of how cool and awesome it is. Does your DD have any characters she likes? You can find almost anything for kids' rooms nowadays. Good luck!

We have small bedrooms, and her 4-in-1 crib is already in there up next to our bed.  I'm hesitant to move it in case she has some really rough nights, either of us is sick, etc.  Plus, I want DH to realize that if/when I get pregnant with the next LO, that he/she will sleep in that crib right next to me.  I'd prefer not to have to play the musical furniture game again, kwim? 

As for characters, DD doesn't watch TV so she doesn't know any.  We have bedding to go with her room/crib that has sea animals on it and it has never been used as it wasn't really safe when she was little, so that might be "new" to her anyway.  Or maybe since that stuff is gender neutral I can save it for the next LO and get her some new big girl pretty pattern.

Also, I'm wanting to really start a daily/nighttime routine with her anyhow to get her to bed earlier and normalize our lives a little.  Not a schedule, but just something she can expect in order like, wake up, go potty, eat breakfast, play time, snack, play, lunch, nap, etc.  And at night bath, read books, cuddle/nurse, sleep.... make sense?

[lifeguard]

I nightweaned ds before I transitioned him to his own room. By that I mean he was sleeping at least one 5-6 hour chunk in the night. We set up his room with a single bed (with rails) & he would start the night in his own room. When he woke in the night I would either nurse him back down in his own bed or I would bring him to bed with us (depending mostly on how tired I was feeling) - we did this for about 6 months. He now mostly sleeps through the night & comes to our bed in the early morning for another hour or so of sleep.

As for the baby monitor - I despise them. They always hum & it drives me to distraction. We have a small house & I thought we'd be fine without one but I quickly realized when we switched him that the only way I could hear him was if he was really screaming (I have to keep my door closed to keep the dogs out) so we live with the monitor.

[Spring Lily]

We left the crib side-carred by the bed, and then set up DD's new bed in her room. We brought her with us tot he store and she helped pick out sheets and a blanket. She was SO excited about having this fun new bed in her room! We kept saying it was her OWN bed, if she wanted to sleep there. That very night she decided she did indeed want to sleep there, and there was no looking back. I did let her sleep in the crib for naps still, so she didn't feel kicked out of our room. I got pregnant when my DD was as old as yours is, but it was a few months before we set the bed up. I had started getting really uncomfortable and thought I'd do better if she was in the other room. We're about to transition our twins and are going to try the same technique! We'll see if we were just lucky with her or what.

I think the main thing is making it fun, exciting, their own choice, and totally no pressure.