I think my mate has Narcolepsy and it is drivng me batty....

[onlyAngil]

It seems my mate has Narcolepsy mostly showing in hypnogogic hallucinations which are very vivid and sometimes violent or bizarre sensations, almost dreamlike, that occur on waking or falling asleep, for him falling a sleep. In other words he acts really mean and then remembers none of it in the morning, but always feels bad that I am upset. He wont go to sleep at the same time every night, he wont nap when I ask him too, or go to bed at night when I see he need it and asks him too and just starts making my life so upsetting I want to kick him out, and move on with out him... I dont but in the moment I feel I want to... I do send him to my moms house sometimes as I just no longer want to hear him. Mind you this has been going on for years so I am a bit past the sleep it off... I mean I do, but I am just getting more and more upset about it because he dose nothing to try and work with the problem, eating better to see if that helps, reducing stress, or having good sleep sleep hygiene, and wont see a Dr. even though he has told me he will.

I just want to cry as to night it ended with me telling him to eat and go to bed or to go outside ... he went outside telling me how in the morning he was calling the cops (I know he wont, and he wont remember it even) and how much he loves the snow. I knew he would just go to my moms (next door) and did then went to sleep, but I am left wanting to cry, and not wanting to talk to him till I cool off, which he will only half get.

I know I cannot fix him or the problem but I am so lost, at my wits end, and it is upsetting his life, my life, our life, my moms life, family like, and while no one else sees it the kids lives.... I think I am going to go cry.

Any ideas on how to help him or help me handle it are welcome... and are even why I am writing.

(Sorry if this is the wrong place to post)

[Naturopath Mom]

Big hugs to you Mama! That all sounds very hard to get though and I'm sure it can really start to wear on you.

I have dealt with something simliar in that my husband would not remember what happened either. I would not say it is as bad as what you are dealing with, but I understand how that feels. I'm sure you are incredibly frustrated. Have you thought about seeking counseling for yourself? I think it is obvious that your dh could benefit from seeing any kind of professional, but until he gets there a counselor can certainly help you sort out your thoughts and problems. Often they can help people think of simple things to do as well, that will help your spouse.

Could you try to not be around him at bed time? If you were in another room would it still be the same? I'm guessing you tried this. I do not have much other help, especially since he will not take any supplements, flower essences could probably help him.

I hope all goes well for you.

[onlyAngil]

I have thought about councilors for myself, but every time I go and see one they want a "problem" for us to work on, and not just "life is hard I want help mentally detoxing" ... I have Medicaid and so as of right now can only go to gov funded places for any type of mental help. To top it off once we come up with something to "work on" about 3 or 4 visits late they start asking/ saying things like "You seem like you are doing fine, why do you feel you need to see me? I see no reason why you keep coming if we are "working" on nothing." This even happened when I was seeing a Dr. for PPD! I feel a councilor could be very helpful just as a well care thing if nothing more, but I have lost hope about seeing one at any of the places I can get to now... :( When things change for my coverage or I find some other place I might I will definitely look more into doing this.

I have tried to not be around him when I notice he is "wonkie," it is not just bed time, but anytime he gets to little sleep, or, well, that seems to be the main factor. If I am in another room he just seems to come and find me... or trashes the house, mostly by leaving trash around, like open food boxes and just random stuff. It is hard to be "MAD" at him. I love him to much to stay that way... but boy dose he do a good job at getting me POed!!!!

As for him getting help it is he is "willing" he just keeps not doing it - like he says he will call the Dr. and make an appt but then it never happens. He would take supplements, or flower essences if I give them to him (and constantly reminded him). I mark this up to him being a pooh bear of a bull, a Phlegmatic (did I spell that right?) temperament, if you have any idea what I am talking about, and a Taurus... not that I fully read in to either concept, he fits both soooo well it is scary at times!

If you have any ideas on what I might offer him please me know :D

[Naturopath Mom]

How frustrating that must be to have counselors bascially turn you away! At least you gave it a try. Can you maybe make the appointment for him? I do not like doing it, but I know my hubby really likes it when I do things like that for him. He has told me sometimes he just doesn't have it in himself to try, no motivation, no hope, etc. Maybe you could set up an appt for him that you are pretty sure is a good time he could make and see if he would go? I also have to help give supplements to my dh, not entirely sure why but he has a hard time taking them on his own accord.

I have to have a good idea of feelings to suggest some flower essences but anger would be Holly. For feeling guilty/bad would be Pine. If he has a hard time sleeping because of swirling thoughts that do not go away, that would be White Chestnut. That is about all I can take out of your post, I would need a bit more detailed info on how he or you act/feel. If you can discribe it more I will do my best to help. :)