S/O Why do parents regulate what their kids take out of the library? Do you? - Page 6

[happysmileylady]

AR was mentioned by a previous poster and that's totally what I was thinking.  There are kids who will "sandbag" their AR stuff so that they get the higher scores without much work.  When I was a kid, we had a program at my elementary school called Book It.  It had different levels with different prizes and you tracked your reading based on the amount you read...either by number of books or number of pages when you were reading chapter books.  You had to read 15 books to move up to the next level.  I was in 4th grade and several of my friends were reading 15 "books" in a night because they were reading board books.  I can totally see a parent who has a kid doing that type of thing requiring that the kid get at least one book at reading level, if not several.

In addition, if the mom or the library has a limit of how many books they can check out at once, I can certainly understand a mom wanting her kid to pick out one or more books that will take more than 10 minutes for the kid to read. 

Unless you are seeing the kids, and books and seeing the moms and kids regularly, I wouldn't really assume anything.  You never know if they have been working on branching out or if the kids have been trying to "cheat" reading programs or whatever.

[SuburbanHippie]

I do place limits for my oldest child.  He's 11 and reads above his reading level.  If he had it his way, he would only read anime cartoon books.  These have about 5 sentences per page and he's done reading each in about 20 minutes.  5 books will last him an hour.  Then he wants me to drive him back to the library again.  No way. 

I started allowing him to get 2 of the anime books and 3 other chapter novels.  This has worked out quite well for us.  I'm not driving to the library every day and he's expanding his world by choosing books he wouldn't normally pick.  Since then he's started to pick up more adult/fantasy (not erotica fantasy- like dragons/creatures etc fantasy) books and he's starting to slightly pull away from the anime. 

[Parker'smommy]

I've discouraged the reading of too large of books for my ds. And it's because he just can't focus on a 500 page book right now  . For example, he got "Dragon Rider". And he enthusiastically read the first 3 chapters with gusto! And then he lost interest....for 3 months. And then he wants to start reading it again, but he's forgotten some of what he read, and so he has to reread, and then....he loses interest again. It just is too difficult. I told him to put it away, and maybe next year, he can try again. So, when we go to the library, I ask him to get smaller books with less pages so that he can actually read an entire story, front to back.

[Lisa1970]

I would a little bit, maybe. But there are great benefits to reading ability that involves reading books that are at a lower reading level. Besides..who assigns the reading levels anyway? I read lots of things that are below my level. It is not much fun to read when you have to work hard the whole time to push yourself to "learn" more. Reading for fun is fine.

The only time I would regulate it is if they picked a book on topic matter that I did not want them to have. Not sure what that topic matter is, as they have never picked a book on that. But, I would limit that. Oh..I know...maybe a Family Guy comic book or something..if they make those. 

[Delicate]

No way.

I don't care if it's at their "level." THEY are obviously getting something from it, and I value what my kids value and I respect them and their interests, even if I don't personally understand it. I think it's horribly disrespectful to another person to tell them that they can't read something they want to because it's "not hard enough" for them. Reading should be for joy, not for prestige of the "level" of it. I don't want to ruin that for them. No one dictates that I read at a certain level just because I'm at a certain capability. For chrissake, my degree is in literature, and I still get great enjoyment out of novels I could not only write myself, but could write better. That doesn't mean they're not enjoyable and that I don't get something out of them. Why would children be any different?

I don't believe in censorship either, so go crazy. If it's that bad, they'd probably lose interest anyway, and if not, we'll just read it together and talk about it.

I ask my daughters to not take out too many books at once. We're pretty disorganized and inevitably if one of us (I'm guilty of it as much as they are) take out too amny, we lose track very quickly. But it happens, and we always do find them eventually. $1.77 in library fees is peanuts.

[mama1803]

Originally Posted by Delicate 

No way.

I don't care if it's at their "level." THEY are obviously getting something from it, and I value what my kids value and I respect them and their interests, even if I don't personally understand it. I think it's horribly disrespectful to another person to tell them that they can't read something they want to because it's "not hard enough" for them. Reading should be for joy, not for prestige of the "level" of it. I don't want to ruin that for them. No one dictates that I read at a certain level just because I'm at a certain capability. For chrissake, my degree is in literature, and I still get great enjoyment out of novels I could not only write myself, but could write better. That doesn't mean they're not enjoyable and that I don't get something out of them. Why would children be any different?

 ITA.

[SuburbanHippie]

Originally Posted by Delicate 

No way.

I don't care if it's at their "level." THEY are obviously getting something from it, and I value what my kids value and I respect them and their interests, even if I don't personally understand it. I think it's horribly disrespectful to another person to tell them that they can't read something they want to because it's "not hard enough" for them. Reading should be for joy, not for prestige of the "level" of it.

So what if your child decided they only wanted to read board books?  You wouldn't try to guide him towards books geared toward his age group?  Really?
 

[seagull]

I have to admit that I do limit and reject some of the choices from my 5 and 3 year old.  We go to several libraries, but one of them has an entire display of pop lit for toy brands.  I can't tell you what I have endured by reading Little Pony, Barbie, Thomas, Dora, and Princess stories.   I only let them get one book each off of those shelves because I cannot stand the quality of writing and the commercialization.  Plus, they are flimsy paperbacks that seem to always be losing pages. 

[quaz]

While I have not told my daughter she can not read something, I have strongly suggested other material.

I had a child that went on a reading strike for over a year, where she went from reading chapter books, to only picture books. Yes, I know that many picture books are at a higher reading level than chapter books. Yes, I know that she was getting something from the picture books. I also know, though, there was some reason for a long continued book strike. Because of that I continued to give her chapter book suggestions, and ideas. My fear was that she was purposefully lowballing what she could read because she was fearful of standing out and being different. It would have been different if it was a few months, but we are talking about over a year. 

I think what helped confirm my concern... this happened at the beginning of K, and ended several weeks into summer break.

Tammy

Originally Posted by SuburbanHippie 

Originally Posted by Delicate 

No way.

I don't care if it's at their "level." THEY are obviously getting something from it, and I value what my kids value and I respect them and their interests, even if I don't personally understand it. I think it's horribly disrespectful to another person to tell them that they can't read something they want to because it's "not hard enough" for them. Reading should be for joy, not for prestige of the "level" of it.

So what if your child decided they only wanted to read board books?  You wouldn't try to guide him towards books geared toward his age group?  Really?
 

[Delicate]

Really. It's not about the books or the level. It's about respect.
 

Originally Posted by SuburbanHippie 

Originally Posted by Delicate 

No way.

I don't care if it's at their "level." THEY are obviously getting something from it, and I value what my kids value and I respect them and their interests, even if I don't personally understand it. I think it's horribly disrespectful to another person to tell them that they can't read something they want to because it's "not hard enough" for them. Reading should be for joy, not for prestige of the "level" of it.

So what if your child decided they only wanted to read board books?  You wouldn't try to guide him towards books geared toward his age group?  Really?
 

[Smithie]

I'm a voracious reader who's likely to raise three little voracious readers. I'm not a censorship fan and I couldn't care less if they read books at a lower "level," but I read SO MUCH NIHILISTIC CRAP aimed at the YA market, from the time I was 10 years old or so, that I've decided I need to read every. single. book. in that genre that that comes into this house, so I'll know when to start conversations about incest, devil worship, etc. After my mom got a load of some of the YA stuff, she turned me loose on adult romance novels, because the only problematic content there is sex between two attractive consenting adults. Which is actually not problematic.  

[Tigerchild]

I generally let my kids check out whatever they want so long as it's developmentally appropriate (I don't limit them to the kids' section, they all LOVE non-fic and artist books, but I would redirect them from erotica and stuff like the twilight series at this point--though a book about vampire mythology or the human atlas, go for it babe).

The only thing in the "appropriate" category that I don't allow them to check out are books we already have.  I feel like if they do that they may be denying other kids who don't already have that book a chance to enjoy it.  Otherwise, yes, they could check out all board books and i don't care.  at the school library, they are limited to 2 "just right" and 1 "for fun" books, so they already have some structure there and in the classroom.  I see no reason why they have to be limited in their free time as well.

As time goes on I envision this as a good foil for censorship that inherently exists in the school library system.  For example our elementary school does not have the Twilight series (not that I am complaining about that), but they DO have the Hunger Games trilogy.  Now, I agree that the Collins books are superior in ideas and writing, but come on--there are kids brutally torturing and killing other children, child prostitution, ect. in those books, yet Twilight can't be in there because of romance (however laced with domestic violence it may be) and teen marriage and all that other stuff?  Yeah, right.  The nice thing about the public library (at least in my area) is that they have both.  i would talk with my kids about the disturbing themes in both, but at least they have access to all.

Like Smithie, I am a lightening quick, voracious reader.  if my kids wanted to check out a book I hadn't read before, I'd just read it first.  it would take maybe half a day tops.  If i didn't have that natural inclination though--i have to remind myself that it is logical for other people to be more cautious.

I still don't get why anyone gives a care what other people's kids check out at the library though.  So what if someone limits/redirects their kids (or doesn't)?  You don't know the reason, unless you ask.  If you're not brave enough to ask them personally (because each parent is likely to be different), then as far as I'm concerned you should probably myob. 

[*LoveBugMama*]

This is an interesting topic. 

I`m Norwegian, living in Norway. And it seems like we here don`t have as much of a focus on reading at "the right level" as some other countries, from what I have read in this thread. (and the links provided.) At my sons school they just want them to read.  All the kids are expected to have a book available every day, so they can read when they have a little freetime, when they eat etc. But no one seems to care what they read, as long as they read. Luckily. 

I would not regulate what my son reads, or takes out from the library. He chooses freely, and always has. He had a periode (over a year) when he was around 4 where he was pretty obsessed with pregnancy and birth. He took out a lot of books about birth in that periode. Some with graphic pictures of women giving birth, complete with blood and full frontal nudity. And that was totally ok with me. He learned soo much from that periode! 

Now he is almost 10, and he isn`t very interested in reading, sadly. (But he is a pretty descent reader.) But he still likes picturebooks and books geared towards children younger than him. And I would absolutely never say he couldn`t borrow those books. I always let him take what he wants, and then I find some I think he would like. And we also always pick out some about the ocean, dinosaurs, tornadoes or something else he finds fascinating. 

I believe reading is important. I think it helps build a great vocabulary, it teaches us about the power of the written word, it helps with the imagination etc. And I believe that reading should be fun. 

[loraxc]

if my kids wanted to check out a book I hadn't read before, I'd just read it first.

Gosh, really? Wait, how old are your kids? See, I'm a super-fast reader too--and so is my DD! She routinely checks out 15+ chapter books at a time and is capable of reading several in a day. No way could I vet them all (not and get my own reading done!) I do try to quickly assess them, though I can only recall taking one away (it was a YA book about child abuse/runaways that was in with a bunch of kids' books someone gave us). In that case it was obvious from the back of the book.

After my mom got a load of some of the YA stuff, she turned me loose on adult romance novels, because the only problematic content there is sex between two attractive consenting adults. Which is actually not problematic.

I really see your point here! Interesting.

[Tigerchild]

Yes, really.  I read 2-3 adult (meaning not YA or kids' books, not porn/romancenovels) a day on a regular basis (unless I have a big project or something).  I don't watch TV, and I've cut my online time back significantly, and I often have chunks of the day where I have 30-40 minutes of time available to me.  I don't really understand the snark about this--I did say that I didn't expect most people to have my mad reading skillz.  That is why I don't have to worry much about it.  None of my kids seems to have inherited that ability, and they're all much older than I was when I started setting goals at various bases (military brat here) to read all of the books in the library (that I was allowed to check out--at least when I was growing up there were age restrictions on some titles or they were not allowed to be checked out by civilians) by the time we transferred (usually every 12-18 months).

So yep, golly gee, that would sure work for me.  :)  It's why I have empathy for people who could not do that.  Easy for me to say I'd just read the book first--because I'm capable of doing that without making my child wait for longer than a day.  Other people have more difficult choices to make, and I do not envy them.

Originally Posted by loraxc 

if my kids wanted to check out a book I hadn't read before, I'd just read it first.

Gosh, really? Wait, how old are your kids? See, I'm a super-fast reader too--and so is my DD! She routinely checks out 15+ chapter books at a time and is capable of reading several in a day. No way could I vet them all (not and get my own reading done!) I do try to quickly assess them, though I can only recall taking one away (it was a YA book about child abuse/runaways that was in with a bunch of kids' books someone gave us). In that case it was obvious from the back of the book.


 

[loraxc]

Tigerchild, my tone wasn't meant to be snarky, if you read it that way. I have a precious half hour or so a day for uninterrupted reading, and I couldn't bear to spend it reading some of the dreck DD checks out....I want to read my own stuff! I couldn't possibly sacrifice it to, I dunno, Kaya and the Lone Dog: A Friendship Story, (currently being read by DD) or even Ramona Forever, which I did not pre-vet to my downfall, as it contains a sad pet death.

[Lisa1970]

I might suggest some other books, but otherwise, no. There is an academic benefit to reading books below grade level. But regardless, what is wrong with reading for fun only? I mean, what I read is mostly just about what I want to read, not about what will get me ahead academically. I think it turns a child off to reading to be under constant pressure of only reading books at certain levels.
 

Originally Posted by SuburbanHippie 

So what if your child decided they only wanted to read board books?  You wouldn't try to guide him towards books geared toward his age group?  Really?
 

[CBEmomma]

Nope. ds1 is allowed to take any childrens book that interests him. When he's older and into reading more then we'll expand to other areas of interest.

[Honey693]

DD2 is only 2.5, but I don't see myself limiting books unless she grabs erotica off the shelf.  The only time I do now is when she wants to renew Carl the Dog for the 3rd time.  I can't read that book for 9 weeks straight and they're incredibly popular so I feel bad for other kids who want to check it out.

[trianglekitty]

I typically just lurk here, but this thread hits home with me and I felt the need to share.  

My mother took me to the library twice a week, and never restricted what I picked out.  I read some pretty heavy books when I was a kid and yes, I did have nightmares, but I don't really see nightmares as a bad thing.  It is the mind's way of working through scary concepts.  When I was eight or so I read David Gerrold's War of the Chtorr series.  On the surface the series is about giant alien worms eating people, but there's a lot about taking responsibility for your life and what responsibility really means.  Those books more or less set my moral code for the rest of my life and I'm so glad I read them when I did. 

When I was about 10 I read a book called Ashes to Ashes in which children are killed in various terrible ways.  This book stuck me for life...I had frequent dreams about it into my adulthood.  I could never remember the title or the author, only what the cover looked like.  I spent well over a decade trying to find this sucker again, to the point I went back to the town where I grew up and searched through every single shelf in the library.  I had people tell me the book never existed and I was clearly suffering from repressed memories of abuse. Someone on a book forum finally tracked down the title for me, and she only remembered it because she too had read it as a child and been haunted by it. 

Not sure what the moral of the story is, but even after that book got stuck in my brain and basically tortured me half my life, I'm still glad my mom let me read any book I got my hands on, and I'd do the same with my own kids.  If a book haunts you, it means there was something in that meant something to you. I want my kids to have a book or two that really gets stuck with them, even if that book is a little dark.