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Anyone else trying to stay Green Team this time?

post #1 of 32
Thread Starter 

With both children, DH and I found out what we were having at the 18 week anatomy scan. We have both a boy and a girl now, and this will be our last child, so I am thinking about waiting until birth to find out. A big part of me really wants to do just that, but another huge part of me is so impatient and thinks I will cave during the ultrasound! Any tips or encouragment to keep me staying on the green team? Has anyone done both (find out during one pregnancy, and not the other)? What was more exciting?

post #2 of 32

I found out right away at my u/s with DS, but didn't want to know last time with DD, so we didn't find out at our u/s with her. We did find out she had serious issues though, so we decided we wanted to know after that. So I've found out both times as well, and also have one of each, and this may also be our last baby.

This time I'm not terribly attached to the idea of one sex over the other, since we already have one of each, so we're not planning on finding out. I have a feeling it's a boy, and I'm actually a little afraid I'll be able to tell when we go for our u/s (just because I ended up having SO MANY u/s's with DD that I am really pretty good at telling what's what now). But when we went for the first one with DD and told the tech we didn't want to know, she was really careful and good about not letting us see that area. I say keep it a secret!

post #3 of 32

We did not find out with #1 (DS) but did with #2 (DD)-I REALLY wanted a girl, and was afraid of gender disappointment clouding the birth for me, no matter how selfish that may sound. This time we are not planning to find out.

 

Definitely NOT finding out was more exciting, but I am happy with what we did in each case. Part of me wants to find out with this one, but it's mainly to get more decluttering done, LOL, so I'm going to stand strong. I may be able to tell on the U/S-that was one thing with DS, we were SO adament about not finding out I feel like we missed half the U/S from not looking, but I think I can be a little less paranoid this time. One other thing, SO many people were actually OFFENDED that we didn't find out, which I find amusing and just makes me want to annoy them again, LOL.

 

The other downside-coming up with names for both genders-we debate names until the end of time.

post #4 of 32

We did find out w/DD#1. Our babyshower was ducky themed but after the presents were opened it looked like the "pink snow" part of that Cat in the Hat book. Pink stuff everywhere (we were extremely grateful for the gifts, but blindsided by the pink-ness of it all!). redface.gif

 

With our 2nd pregnancy we did NOT find out. And yes, it earned us alot of green/yellow gifts. I did hold onto DD#1's clothes and luckily so because LO #2 turned out to be a girl. I bought used baby clothes which were boy-ish too and DD ended up wearing those as well.

 

The moment where you get to "discover" what your baby is is irreplacable. I don't think it affected how I bonded w/baby during the pregnancy, I just was very anxious to find out. biggrinbounce.gif

 

I like waiting for the suprise and think it's well worth the wait. I would likely find out the sex if a life-threatening defect was discovered, otherwise we'll be waiting to see what this LO is. This one will be our last as well.

post #5 of 32


And i must also admit we like having ppl wait in suspense. Annoyed suspense.
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Curlyfry7 View Post

We did not find out with #1 (DS) but did with #2 (DD)-I REALLY wanted a girl, and was afraid of gender disappointment clouding the birth for me, no matter how selfish that may sound. This time we are not planning to find out.

 

Definitely NOT finding out was more exciting, but I am happy with what we did in each case. Part of me wants to find out with this one, but it's mainly to get more decluttering done, LOL, so I'm going to stand strong. I may be able to tell on the U/S-that was one thing with DS, we were SO adament about not finding out I feel like we missed half the U/S from not looking, but I think I can be a little less paranoid this time. One other thing, SO many people were actually OFFENDED that we didn't find out, which I find amusing and just makes me want to annoy them again, LOL.

 

The other downside-coming up with names for both genders-we debate names until the end of time.



 

post #6 of 32

It's interesting.  With DD and DS we waited until birth.  This time around I'm not so sure I can wait.

post #7 of 32
Quote:
Originally Posted by Curlyfry7 View Post

We did not find out with #1 (DS) but did with #2 (DD)-I REALLY wanted a girl, and was afraid of gender disappointment clouding the birth for me, no matter how selfish that may sound. This time we are not planning to find out.

 

I think the gender disappointment thing is a great reason to find out, and I don't think it's selfish at all. I wanted DS to be a girl SO badly, when I found out at the u/s that he was a boy, I cried for almost a week. I was really glad to be able to deal with that before my baby was actually born!

post #8 of 32

I know a lot of people who would be disappointed but we didn't find out with DD and this time around, I am in the same boat. I would like to keep it a surprize! Other people just love to buy gender specific clothes. I don't care about it and would put any baby in any colour.

post #9 of 32

we waited with DS and we'll wait with this one also.  I just love the daddy being able to be the first one to see and blurt it out.  Of all the patients I have in a month, I'd say only 1 or 2 don't find out.  It's so much fun in the moment.  It got us a lot of green and yellow last time but that's OK since they grow out of the nb stuff so fast.  I must admit though, my BFF didn't find out either and it was WAY harder being the friend and not being able to buy them gender appropriate stuff than it was being the mama. 

post #10 of 32

We found out with our son and our daughter. Both times, I REALLY wanted exactly what I got and would have been disappointed if the results had been different. So finding out was wonderful. I reeeeally wanted my Boy first. And then I REEEEALLY wanted a girl. I spent those first 18-20 weeks waiting and trying to prepare for disappointment but was so happy to know and be able to prepare. I made tons of Hairbows for my daughter and got her PINK clothes and dresses all ready.

 

We are staying green team this time. I still have plenty of clothes from both kids as well as neutral stuff. I only sort of hope its a girl because I have SO MUCH girl stuff than boy stuff but I like the boy name we picked a little better than the girl name but really honestly don't care either way. I can't wait to go through the work of labor for that ultimate reward of finding out who my baby is. love.gif

I will absolutely LOVE keeping the gender and names secret from everyone. FIREdevil.gif And we can always have the baby shower after the baby is born. We did that with my daughter and they turned out so much more fun being able to pass her around.

post #11 of 32

i am definitly not finding out. partially because i have a lot of transgender freinds and what my child is born with doesn't seem like a concrete proof of gender. i love my child regardless and if one day my son tells me he is really a she that won't change any. but also i have realized i have another reason not to find out. because of my own childhood i think i will have a lot of anxiety having a girl. with my son i was so afraid i would not be able to protect himand keep hims afe once born it hink it delayed labor and this time arround i am realizing that in many ways i would prefer a girl. i am more anxious about having a girl. if i ound out my child was probably a girl then i think it might cause enough anxiety to delay labor for me. it is a really odd realization. regardless of gender my kid will end up in a lot of blue and green because those are colors i like and when my kid is old enough to voice a preference then they can choose any color they want. i have always dressed my son in a lot of orange because he is an october baby and he loves pink as much as any other color and wears every color of the rainbow and and i am lucky enough to live someplace where no one blinks an eye if a boy is dressed in what might be considered a more femenine color and girls wear whatever they want and it is fine. 

 

 

post #12 of 32

I'm so on the fence.  My DH really doesn't want to know and I really do (at least at first).  It seems to me that he gives up so much for me and allows me to make so many decisions that I just feel like I should respect his wish in not wanting to find out.  It is our first and the pressure from family and friends is a little overwhelming.  Everyone wants to buy/make that gender specific stuff.

 

I'm kind of leaning towards not finding out.....DH said we could find out with the first but none of the others and I'm ok with that too.

 

It's definitely harder picking out names for both genders. 

 

My BFF is really bugging me to find out.  She wants to make a bunch of stuff for the LO.  I was thinking that if we didn't find out, the tech could write down the sex and put it in a sealed envelope for her but I think the temptation would be too much for her and she would have to wait until after the babe was born to give us our gifts.


Only time will tell-- I guess.

post #13 of 32

We will not find out.  We waited to find out with the first 2 children.  With the second 2, I needed to know, I really wanted a boy and needed to get my heart right and bond with the baby (either way) early on before the birth.  I actually prefer finding out, I don't feel like it takes anything away from the birth being special and exciting.  However, dh prefers not to find out and I don't feel a strong need to know this time, so we'll wait.

post #14 of 32
Quote:
Originally Posted by noahs.mom06 View Post



Quote:
Originally Posted by Curlyfry7 View Post

We did not find out with #1 (DS) but did with #2 (DD)-I REALLY wanted a girl, and was afraid of gender disappointment clouding the birth for me, no matter how selfish that may sound. This time we are not planning to find out.

 

I think the gender disappointment thing is a great reason to find out, and I don't think it's selfish at all. I wanted DS to be a girl SO badly, when I found out at the u/s that he was a boy, I cried for almost a week. I was really glad to be able to deal with that before my baby was actually born!


This is the reason we have both decided to find out gender next month. I had planned on not finding out, but my husband and I decided I probably need to find out as well due to gender disappointment issues I had last time around. We have three daughters. I'm afraid of having a fourth daughter (think of the teenage years!), but I'm also afraid of having a son. I'm not sure I'd know what to do with a boy and I know all about girls, but it'd sure be nice to have a boy. Health is still our number one priority, though.

post #15 of 32

This is our first baby and we are trying to stay gender neutral and not find out until baby makes his or her way into the world. We are looking forward to the surpise. I day dream about my husband being the first to tell me once baby is born.  We've gotten mixed reactions from friends and family. Some have said "how will I know what to buy you", and "how can you prepair or know how to decorate the nursery".  We are pepairing for a baby, why does it matter if it's a girl or a boy.  I would be overwhelmed to have everything pink or blue. Oh yeah, we're not sharing names either.

post #16 of 32

We didn't find out with our first two and won't this time either. I'm really not a pink or blue person and don't really care about anything being gender specific. Family typically goes nuts after the birth and buys us the gender specific stuff anyway. Nobody gave us a hard time about it, but most of the great aunts and grandparents are of a generation where you didn't find out gender. 

We have funny stories to go along with finding out after the birth as well. With DS, DH got to be the first to look and announced at first that he was a girl. I was holding him and got a look as well and told him to look again lol.gif I strongly felt that he was a boy so there was little surprise. With DD, my midwife came in and I hadn't checked yet. She asked me what we had and I opened her legs to look and literally screamed OH MY GOD I HAVE A DAUGHTER!!! and started crying. This time I'm not sure who will announce but I really do love that one last surprise at the end. 

post #17 of 32
We're planning to find out (because I'm impatient and don't think I can resist) but we've already told friends and family to buy green anyways. It's mine and DH's favorite color so baby gets green whether it's a boy or a girl smile.gif I absolutely loathe pink anything so I'm really hopeful that if I have a girl, she won't be really in to pink redface.gif
post #18 of 32

We aren't going to find out. I didn't want to find out with our first, but my hubby did so I caved. This will be my last pregnancy, so I am stranding strong this time!  I can't wait for the surprise :)

 

Also, we don't favor one gender over the other and have plenty of gender neutral newborn clothes. We don't do the whole nursery thing either so it's not like we need to know gender for any reason. 

post #19 of 32
Thread Starter 

This thread is making me really excited about waiting to find out this time!! joy.gif

post #20 of 32

I'm pregnant with baby #1, and we are not going to find out the baby's sex, for several reasons: 

 

1. It will force us (and everybody else) to buy gender-neutral clothes, crib bedding, diaper bags, etc. that can be re-used for baby #2 if #2 is the opposite sex. 

 

2. We aren't having an ultrasound unless there are symptoms of a problem.

 

3. I think the anticipation of finding out will help me get through labor! (We're planning a natural childbirth, either at home or at a birthing center.)

 

Plus, I just love surprises! And green is my favorite color!

 

But I have a feeling it's a boy. Although I kind of want a girl. But either one is fine. :)

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