Fabulous 40++TTC. New Year and New Hopes - Page 21

[Kristin0105]

Oh Saorise, I am so in the same category as you, not a pot around. No misspent youth either just tried to save the world and help others not caring if I was getting paid or not. Don't know what I was thinking.

Interesting about the full fat dairy. I am in the other boat and trying no cow's milk but just got an order of sheep's milk yogurt that I am enjoying. Maybe that will be the trick. Just looked at my FF chart and if I got pregnant this cycle my dd would be one day before my last due date for the miscarriage I had two years ago. Maybe it's a good omen. Like this time it will work. Or maybe I am always grasping at straws.

[WaturMama]

We also did not spend our earlier decades amassing wealth. And I did enjoy my life then, which means when people try to tell me I should leave my child alone and go out more I don't connect to that at all. I did plenty of that before and imagine I'll have plenty of time for that later--I'm enjoying mothering now.

Kristin, I'm sending good thoughts and am optimistic that that is indeed a good omen for you.

My temperature shifted this morning on CD14. I know it could be an anomaly but it was quite pronounced. Along with it I have intense menstrual-type cramps. Sometimes I have cramps at O time, though usually not this intense. I looked back in my charts (over 10 years worth!) and I have never had a temp shift on CD14--a few times CD15, but typically CD17 or later. I don't know what it all means, but we did have very good timing if that was the real thing. I am hoping it is a good omen.

[sundaya]

Hello all,

I'm a long-time lurker. I'm 43, DD is 27 months and still nursing, although we have cut back to 3-4 time times a day and not at night. We ttc'd for 16 cycles before getting a bfp. I'm now 22 weeks, due in July, and the anatomy scan showed a healthy baby.

 I just wanted to share another happy story. I know how hard I was looking for stories of women in our age group who had conceived while nursing.

Wishes to all of you who are waiting  for strong healthy uneventful pregnancies SOON.

[gumblossom]

It's so good to hear of all these pregnancies.Congratulations.

I've not been around much, trying to not to focus on ttc too much. I'm 11 dpo and know I'm not pregnant this month.I've had bfn and temp drop and no symptoms.

I used a fertility monitor this month, which was good as it showed I ovulated earlier than I expected. I gave up sugar too. Have completely cut it out of my diet and feel so good without it. It also means I'm eating more full fat dairy, which I hope will help get me the take home baby I desire!

Do you think baby and pregnancy dreams are significant, or just an extension of desires? I had the most beautiful, clear dream that I birthed a little baby boy in the bath! It was so clear, and as I pulled him up to me I could see his face, looking deep into my eyes. It was very special.I want to think it's significant.

[WaturMama]

Thank you sundaya, that is great to hear. Congratulations on your good news! Lots of good wishes for the rest of your pregnancy and beyond!

What a beautiful dream, gumblossom. So sorry about the bfn. How does the fertility monitor measure ovulation? How much earlier than expected was it? Does that mean there is a bigger gap between ovulation and the temp shift than you expected?

[Kristin0105]

Waturmama from your fingers to the higher powers ears (leaving myself open) Maybe this will be it for you an earlier o on CD14 can't hurt. mine goes too early without help from my TCM provider. 

Sundaya congratulations and thanks for stopping by to tell us your good news.

Gumblossom 11dpo is kind of early maybe your testing too early.

Waturmama I have heard that fertility monitors are not accurate for many women our age range. for m that was true it could never pick up my ovulation it would just register weeks of the same thing but never indicate ovulation. It was a pain I eventually sold it. I use cheap Ovulation strips from baby wishes dot org and they work well for me.

edit to add, found this on another board from 2008 "Yes, I had negative urine tests, went to the doctor at 9 weeks and had a negative blood test.  She refused to do an ultrasound because she said it was just menopause since I was 50 years old.  I had never missed a period in my life until October 14.  I kept having symptoms of pregnancy and went back to the doctor at 16 weeks.  She gave me an ultrasound and there he was!  I just took the HPT yesterday for fun to see if it would show positive. It was still negative and I'm 24 weeks. My oldest child is 28 and I have a 24 year old daughter that is pregnant with me! "

If anyone is interested in some success stories you may like this other thread I found. Hard to read due to the format and the length but some stories of pregnancies. Mostly, oops, I guess the link would be helpful.  

http://www.medhelp.org/posts/Pregnancy-35/Odds-of-Pregnancy-at-Age-47/show/391353

Edited by Kristin0105 - 3/23/11 at 6:10am

[Kristin0105]

and this

http://www.statcan.gc.ca/pub/84f0210x/2007000/t003-eng.htm

Edited by Kristin0105 - 3/23/11 at 8:39am

[purplefish]

Thanks for all the good wishes ladies. Not really sure what's happening at the minute. I took another few tests which were negative and then turned positive overnight. Not sure if this is evaporation lines or not. Also took one which was just positive, so felt a bit uncertain but hopeful.

Went to visit my sister and as expected it was stressful and I didn't really succeed in using the golden shield. The stress really got to me and on the last day I had a bit of brown spotting a bit like start af but only a tiny little bit more last night. So I'm hopeful and fearful all at the same time. Not sure what's happening. Not sure whether to make my midwife appointment or not. I will probably leave it for a few days.

I started full fat dairy and yogurt while ttc a few years ago after reading an article all about its fertility benefits.

I'm also torn about the significance of dreams. My heart leans towards some sort of at least symbolic meaning.

Just googled brown spotting and I'm still hopeful.

Edited by purplefish - 3/23/11 at 4:30am

[purplefish]

Also really intrigued by the whole lunar fertility thing. I actually worked out when my lunar fertile times and it actually coincided to within a few days of when I would supposedly ovulate.

[Kristin0105]

purplefish I had brown spotting around 6 weeks with my first pregnancy, the result is singing in my ear right now.

[contactmaya]

Kristen, the 2nd link didnt work.

Loving those stories  about older women and pregnancy from the first link.

Sundaya, congratulations!!!! Thanks for sharing such good news with us.

Gumblossom, what a beautiful dream.  I cant answer your question. I believe that the person who had the dream knows best what is means.  I believe some dreams tell the future, others are an extension of desires,  and or hidden emotions/thoughts. ( i had a dream last night about a puppet that i had meant to buy as a gift a few weeks ago but had forgotten about. Not my unconscious apparently) 

[lotus1]

I would like to join you all! I'm 40, almost 41. DH is 43. We have one child, he's 4.

We've been officially trying for 2 months now. Had a loss at 8 wks in the fall, unplanned pg, severe HG. Waited 6 mos b/f trying again.

Last week I had a BFP (beta HCG of 32 at 3 wks, 5 d) and felt very positive/hopeful. Nausea started quickly. But sadly this week started cramping/bleeding. Had beta HCG checked Monday, down to 7. :(

To complicate matters, I have had HG (hyperemesis gravidarum) with each pregnancy!

So, I'm nervous about both my age and HG. The nausea/vomiting is severe-- after having my son I said never again could I go thru that.

How long do I have to wait now? Perinatologist says ideally 6 mos, but b/c of my age, waiting 1 cycle should suffice.

I'm thinking what if we don't wait at all?

Any advice as to how long to wait following m/c?

[Kristin0105]

Link above should work now.

Lotus I think that if you feel ready to try again then there is no real reason to wait. I remember when I had my m/c 2 years ago I read that the reason for waiting 3 months is that it is easier for the doctors to date the next pregnancy. I can't imagine why they would say wait 6 months especially knowing that most think women over 40 are ancient.

I just found this: "In Great Britain, according to a new set of statistics released May 24, 2010, despite a dip in overall birth rates, births to women aged 40 and over have almost tripled in the past 20 years—rising from rising 9,336 live births in 1989 to 26, 976 in 2009. Likewise, births to women in the next older age bracket (35 to 39), rose 41 percent from 1989 to 2009. An April 2010 report from the Centers for Disease Control showed similar birth rates in the US, with the birth rate for women in their early 40s rising a surprising 4 percent from 2007 to 2008."

Also same article said women in their 20's are likely to have a 7 percent chance of infertility and women in their 40's the rate goes up to 30%. Do you know what that means we have a 70% chance of being fertile!!!!!! I love that statistic.

I started having weirdo breast feelings last night and today. Too early for implantation but already weird symptoms that I don't usually have. Maybe it's my new TCM herbs. I think the EDD for this cycle is messing with my head. Now ff says my EDD is a day after my last EDD but I think it is actually the same. How weird would that be that the only 2 times I get pregnant in 2 years I would have the same EDD. Getting excited to see how this cycle plays out. Not really sure why. I never get excited during my 2ww. If I start waking up at night worrying about the effect of another child on dd I will KNOW I am pregnant LOL

[purplefish]

Originally Posted by Kristin0105 

purplefish I had brown spotting around 6 weeks with my first pregnancy, the result is singing in my ear right now.

  Just what I need to hear. Finally booked doctors appointment to get the ball rolling.

[Karalina]

lotus1- welcome- and wanted to say I'm sorry-

After tons of research after my m/c in Dec-- and wanting to try again- there were lots of differnet suggestions- basically- I followed my heart and started trying right away- I sis not wait a for a cycle- I still haven't gottn pregnant after trying every month since then- but for me- i felt like I JUST HAD to TTC right away as an affirmation of life and everything i was feeling.

here are some things I saved on favorites when i was trying to decide if I should wait or not:

http://www.medhelp.org/posts/Pregnancy-35/How-soon-can-you-get-pregnant-after-miscarriage/show/366371

http://miscarriage.about.com/od/faqs/f/tryingagain.htm

http://www.medhelp.org/posts/Maternal--Child/Pregnant-after-Miscarriage/show/166426

This is from one of the above links:

Question: When Can I Try to Get Pregnant Again After a Miscarriage?

Many couples want to try again as soon as possible following a miscarriage, especially if the pregnancy loss occurred when they were actively trying to conceive. If you ask three different doctors, however, you may get three different answers!

Answer:

Wait Three Months

For many years, doctors advised women to wait three months before conceiving again. The rationale was that this would allow for better dating of the next pregnancy, by re-establishing the menstrual cycle, and it would give the couple time to deal with grief and emotions over the pregnancy loss. In addition, some practitioners feel that waiting three months allows the body more time to heal and replenish nutrient stores.

Waiting three months takes a cautious approach to subsequent conception. Waiting longer will definitely not hurt you in any way, and if you miscarry again, you will not be left wondering if waiting would have prevented the next miscarriage. But unless your loss happened late in pregnancy, your body may recover fairly quickly from the loss, and evidence suggests that waiting three months does not decrease the odds of another miscarriage.

Wait Until Your Next Menstrual Period

Some doctors advise waiting for one menstrual period, again for the purposes of dating the next pregnancy if conception happens immediately. Waiting for one cycle also establishes that hCG levels have returned to zero and that the body’s hormone levels have normalized.

Try As Soon As You Feel Ready

Despite the traditional advice to wait for dating purposes, many doctors feel that ultrasound is an accurate enough way to date early pregnancies and they advise women that they can try again as soon as they feel ready. Evidence suggests that waiting to conceive again does not alter the risk of miscarriage, and some women cope with pregnancy loss better by trying again right away.

Anyway- I think if you really tune in to yourself- you will know what to do. Lots of love and luck to you.

AFM

I am trying to figure out my low energy levels- my thyroid came back fine, I am tetsing my adrenals and my hormones this month- so i will know more next month and how to proceed with ttc. I am not thinking of it too much right now and I must say it is a big relief.  Sometimes I think it is just right and perfect- the family I have now-- then it will HIT me that I MUST have naother bbay- but that is happening less and less. hmmmmm....

Sending you all LOVE---

[gumblossom]

Hi everyone.There's a lot of action going on here today!

Purplefish, I hope everything is alright.I know how worrying it can be, but if it is brown (rather than red) spotting, it will probably be fine.Hopefully you can have some blood tests or an ultrasound to help ease your mind.

Waturmama, the fertility monitor measures estrogen and the LH surge. What I like about it is you test first thing in the morning, which suits me because with OPK's I sometimes miss the surge.Often the opk shows positive in the mornings, despite the instructions saying to do it after 2 pm. So the monitor shows when estrogen is building up, and will read as "high", but when the LH surge shows it will say "peak". This last time, I had a peak reading on day 13, and ovulated on day 14 (had +opk on day 13 but wouldn't have checked if it weren't for the monitor because I have been ovulating later than that in previous cycles, day 15,16 or 17.) I have wondered if going sugar free helped me to O earlier. I also had great ewcm for the first time in ages. But alas, no baby this month.Hopefully it means things are okay though, and it is just a matter of waiting for the good egg.

My temperature dropped further today at 12 dpo.I usually get AF on 13 dpo, so it will be interesting if my LP is the same or lengthens since giving up sugar. I've heard sugar plays havok with hormones, so I hope that along with all the other benefits, I'll also have better fertility.

That dream I had was so vivid. I did a little "dream reading" exercise, from Julia Indichova's book "The Fertile Female". It helped me to see that the dream is a way of helping me to let go of fear. In the dream I am worried the baby won't breath when I take him out of the water, but I lift him to my breast and he is fine.Then I feel happy, calm and joyful and I think the dream is reassuring me that I can feel those things again if I let go of the fear.

But reality isn't as simple as in the dream! I'll keep trying to let go of fear, I really want to open up to a baby.

[purplefish]

Karalina not sure if you are interested in herbs but nettle infusions are meant to be super good for nourishing the adrenals and brillant for energy levels. I feel so much vital since I started drinking the infusion.

Still spotting but lightly so scary....... But reassuring that its brown.  Not feeling good about this though :(  seems to be getting heavier. .

Think its over back cramping and clots now.  Canceled doctors. So sad.

Edited by purplefish - 3/24/11 at 6:55am

[Karalina]

Thanks Purple fish- i have Nettle for the pregnancy that m/c. So i shall do the nettles tea.

I am so sorry if it is actually over for you- I always like to hold out hope. Hugs to you

[gumblossom]

Oh Purplefish, I am so sorry to hear this. ((HUGS)) I know how sad you are feeling and I wish you didn't have to go through this.

This last couple of days I have been thinking about my miscarriage. I thought I was doing okay, but when AF approaches it just seems like a kick in the gut!

When I told my DH how I was feeling he told me he was sad for me, but glad I am not pregnant. It really hurts to hear this. I knew he didn't really want to to ttc, but he's been "actively" involved  iykwim. I had the idea of giving him an early Christmas card and saying,"thankyou for the early Christmas gift, I'm due December 3rd!" And I imagined he would actually be happy. I know now I'm fooling myself, and that makes me feel lousy.

I don't know where to go from here. The yearning for a babe is so real and I don't think I can brush it off, but I don't want to ttc on my own either.

It's hard enough being over 40 ttc without the pain and sadness of a loss and a DH who isn't on board.

So sorry this post is all about me. I hope everyone else is doing okay.

[WaturMama]

I finally put the smileys back in my signature and changed my avatar. Here I am with my new look!

Oh dear, Purplefish. My heart is going out to you. Let us know what happens.

gumblossom, thank you for explaining about the fertility monitor. The morning does sound like an easier time. Very sorry about your dh's comment. Mine also wouldn't be ttc if it weren't for me. He does make negative comments sometimes and they hurt. But he also actively tries, and works with me on the timing. I struggled with wishing his desires about it were different for a long time. My own calling for this babe is clear enough that I've wanted us to continue ttc. Now I see and appreciate what an amazing gift it is that he does contribute as much as he does to this effort. Any babe truly would be conceived with love and I think that is a mighty good beginning. Sometimes I do wonder how much his not being fully in contributes to our difficulties.

Welcome lotus1!! I am so sorry for both your losses. Does the recommendation to wait such a long time have to do with HG? If not, my understanding is if you ttc the first month after a m/c you are both more likely to get pg and more likely to m/c--though there are plenty of babies born in this situation. Other than that, it is really when you feel ready emotionally.

Kristin, what is too early for an O date? I hope it is both of our month!! Wouldn't that be wonderful.

So I am 3 dpo now on CD16. I have always had long cycles. It seems like I was just in the tww. A lot more opportunities to try this way and I like that! I did have a lot of ewcf this cycle, which seems really good, but the odd thing is that it kept coming until yesterday morning. Tomorrow I will try to talk to my TCM person about this cycle.

Some babydust to all of us! (That is the sticky kind of dust.)