Where to begin??
Welcome and congratulations, Sundaya, EonJourney and Cresmoon! Glad to have you here. Cresmoon, I'm glad DHEA worked for you! I've been on 50mg/day for the past several months.
Kristin, I like your stat about our having a 70% chance of being fertile, thanks for sharing that! Thanks also for the info on iodine. How much are you taking?
Saoirse, congrats on being 11 weeks! Sorry you're green! Do you think you might feel better in the second tri? You and Kristin and others lamented earlier about not having a pot to piss in... add me to your roster. I also spent my youth pursuing creativity and experience rather than wealth and working in giving (rather than receiving) professions. I always tell my DD "we are rich in love" (and someday she will roll her eyes at me the same way I did to my mother).
Buzzer, I'm sorry to see you go as threadkeeper, but my heart can relate to your pull toward putting your bf-ing relationship with your DD first. I still cherish the memory of that relationship with my own DD and am so glad I didn't let anything or anyone get in the way of that. I hope you will stick around and keep us posted on wherever your journey takes you!
Stealthee, I hope you had a lovely vacation in my beautiful city! Slanted Door is delish, isn't it? I love your Top Chef dream, ha! Thanks for your thoughts again on how Ask and It Is Given worked for you... I feel like it's working the same way in my life, although I've only just begun. It is pretty miraculous the difference that little heart/mind tweak is making in helping me re-balance. I feel excited to keep playing with this!
Lotus1, welcome! I'm so sorry for your loss. I too had HG with my DD... the misery is hard to describe. In the throes of it, I remember also thinking, "I will never make myself go through this again." Yet here I am, hoping it will be different for me when my time comes for baby #2. I do have a friend who had HG for #1 and no nausea whatsoever for #2.
Karalina, my goodness, your son weaned! How is everyone doing? His comment about nursing being "boring" is so funny and sweet and shocking all at once! What is it like having that region of your body to yourself again? (Well, actually... I recall now that my boobs remained very important to my DD for years after she weaned). How are your adrenals and hormones? Have you got any results yet? Thank you for letting us know about nascent iodine. Are you taking it yet?
Gumblossom, I'm so, so sorry you're going through this. ((( hugs ))) That sounds really hard for you and DH to not be in alignment about something so big. Did you go through these same feelings with other LO's? Or is this a new feeling for him? I really admire your openness and courage. On a different note, I also admire your diet! I gave up sugar for a few months, but have fallen way, way off the wagon lately. I did feel great while off the evil stuff. Regarding nettles... I drank them for a while (with red raspberry leaf and red clover blossoms) and took Susun Weed's suggestion to cover the flavor with peppermint. It works!
BTW, I have heard that "Do you want to be 80% pregnant" quote (with regards to giving up dairy), which, pardon my French... really pisses me off. I believe that comes from a certain prominent TCM fertility specialist here in the SF Bay Area. I find that comment very manipulative. The whole dairy issue is really confusing because there is evidence that it harms fertility, and there is also evidence that it helps fertility (if full-fat), and no consensus. To take one side and then use scare tactics to bully women into jumping on the bandwagon just seems really patriarchal and disrespectful of our own capacities for critical thinking. Okay, rant over!
Anyway, I am thinking of you and sending you wishes for clarity and hoping you and DH find inroads into one another's hearts in this. ((( hugs )))
Boozheemama, I'm thinking of you, too. It sounds like you are still in a really tough place. Have you thought any more about HRT? It does sound encouraging that other women have gotten pg while on it. Is there any way for you to get a second opinion, or could you maybe see a naturopath or homeopath, someone with a different perspective? What is AMH? Is that anti-mullerian hormone? I don't think I have had that measured. Did you ever make your move to another state? How did it go? How is your DS?
Purplefish, I really admire your way of dealing with this loss... echoing what others have said, the idea of your loss being a kind of homebirth that was on your own terms sounds really healing. It's a beautiful idea to plant something living to commemorate your baby's spirit, something that will grow and thrive and blossom. Sending you ((( hugs ))). I like Susun Weed's infusions, too. I was doing one for quite some time and found the brewing and the drinking a nice ritual. I need to get back to that.
Lovetolaugh, happy belated birthday! Oh my, your dietary restrictions do sound daunting! It's no wonder you're still indulging in a little sugar. I wonder if just a wee bit of it isn't good for your soul?
AFM... it wasn't my month, and I'm on CD2 now. I felt remarkably balanced about this (well, I cried a little bit yesterday on CD1, but it was cathartic and quickly healed by a big, warm hug from DH). I think part of the reason is the small changes I've made as a result of reading Ask and It is Given. I'll try to give the nutshell of my experience with this book... when I first began reading it, I had a hard time getting past my skepticism about the supernatural aspect of it... I kept feeling like it was a marketing ploy or even a literary conceit. The language felt overly simplistic and repetitive. I realized I had to take my academic hat off and read it in a different way to be open to receiving whatever it had to offer. So I played with different ways of framing it (i.e., "this is actually pop psychology" in the same way Malcolm Gladwell's books are pop sociology) until I found a broader perspective that felt comfortable to me. Then, I just opened my heart to it and had fun with it. One of the takeaways for me is I found it incredibly liberating (and fun) to be given permission to fully explore and affirm my desires for a baby. I realized I had been denying them in an effort to protect myself from disappointment (big surprise). I then remembered that I'd gone through the same process with my DH... in the early stages of our relationship, I'd been reluctant to imagine a future with him (having just gone through a divorce). When my therapist encouraged me to just let my mind go to those happy places, I began dreaming of a life together. And here we are, living that life. I wonder what would have happened if I'd continued denying my desires? Anyway, I'm loving the permission and enjoying playing with these exercises. It feels like the kind of wish fulfillment we enjoy in our happiest dreams. I think I understand the letting go of fear thing now... once you embrace your desire and let your heart fully inhabit it, it feels very real, like it's just around the corner, and the fear begins to recede and feel less relevant. Does that make sense?
Apparently, another way you can look at LOA (if you aren't inclined to feel comfy with the Abraham-spirit part) is as neuroscience. Here's a non-authoritative but interesting explanation of the brain's reticular activating system: http://www.selfgrowth.com/articles/How_to_Use_a_Vision_Board_to_Activate_the_Law_of_Attraction.html
And about the energy healing session... oy! I have to get some work done tonight still. This was my happy distraction. I'll have to save that installment for tomorrow.
Love to you all!
Edited by LitMama - 4/7/11 at 11:10pm