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Bitter Sushi Ladies: January Edition - Page 9

post #161 of 433
Thread Starter 


Originally Posted by scarletjane View Post

Thanks for your thoughts on "spotting", guys. I would love to think it's implantation, but it's not. I've had it the last couple of months.  And it's the exact same type of spotting i get right before i start bleeding.  LP lengths over the last months have been: 10, 13, 13, 10, 12, 11.  Do you guys remember hearing that the follicular phase can vary, but the LP is the consistent one?  Mine seems to vary a lot. Anyone else?  I don't know.. or maybe that's not a lot.


*ok, i started this post this morning and now here i am finishing it at night.... so i'm not sure what's been posted since, in case i'm missing on commenting on anything.  i'll catch up on the thread a little later after dinner.

Mine has been odd too.... I only started charting a few months ago, so I don't know if my LP was consistent before then...  but since I started I've had 15, 14, 13, 16, 14....  I'm like you though - I don't know if that's a lot...  or in the realm of "normal"....  but maybe it's something I should ask a Dr about.  Ugh.

post #162 of 433


Edited by miriam_bat_avraham - 5/6/13 at 9:27pm
post #163 of 433
Scarletjane - damn. And yes I also thought that a lp was not supposed to change. Mine changes much like yours.

Beloved - I have "just known" so many times it is funny. No bfps for me. I hope if she is pregnant you don't have to be next to her for the next nine months.
post #164 of 433
My LP changes too! I always wondered about that. It seems my cycles follow 28/30 days regardless of when I O (this is based on the years I temped.)

I can't wait to to if she really is preggo, everyone is blooming around me (more FB announcements, and 8 week belly pics)
post #165 of 433

Belovedhug.gif Why is it pregnant women are always surrounding those of us having trouble? So unfair! Though maybe she isn't pregnant. I think people "just know" they're pregnant often b/c they want to be. I think I've "just known" almost every month, and yet here I still am.


scarletjane, if you're consistently spotting at 7DPO, I'd talk to your doctor. Regarding LP length, I think they can vary a bit, but wasn't it just supposed to be a difference of 1-2 days from one cycle to the next? Mine vary from 12-14 days, usually 13. Before I got pregnant with my son, they seemed to be getting longer and longer but with an earlier and earlier O. Not the case nowadays, sadly. Does your spotting start earlier on cycles with a short LP, or are they independent?



As for me, it's almost 5 in the morning here, and I was awoken with (non-tooth) pain again. Argh. Drinking a hot tea and took a painkiller to soothe. It's 4DPO, or will be once the pain goes away and I go back to bed then wake up for my temp. I feel really guilty about taking any painkiller in the 2WW. What if I'm hurting my baby (assuming there is one)? greensad.gif Usually, I don't ever take any painkillers, except when the pain is unbearable, and I've had like 6 pills in the last week.

post #166 of 433

Beloved, *ugh* in regards to the girl who this she is. So frustrating.


Today DH found out one of his coworkers is pregnant..she's 21, and this is her second child out of wedlock, and she can't really handle the first one, financially or emotionally. Poor little guy is totally out of control. Situations like that are so hard for me to swallow lately. Apparently, this girl is really not thrilled about the whole situation, and taking it out on everyone too.


LTB, I am also very curious about this testing for immune problems. That's something I have wondered for many years, my immune system, and whether or not my adrenals are overloaded. Very interesting. I am so sorry you are having such a hard time though! I keep thinking to myself how unfair it is that money is such an issue with all these fertility treatments and/or adoption. The question about whether or not you will still be bitter years from now if that BFP never comes...part of me says to myself that it's only borrowing trouble to think that way, but it has occurred to me (often, actually) that I will be sad and bitter if DS never gets a sibling, and that I may feel very regretful about the way my life has turned out if that is the case, and I wonder if I will be able to let go of those feelings one day. Right now I'm not ready to entertain those thoughts too much, but as time keeps going on, and we are becoming the minority who only has one child..I don't know. It's just so hard. I feel so sad about it. I don't know if we could ever afford to adopt during the time that we would be young enough too as well. I don't know what the "rules" are about that though, as far as an age cutoff for a "normal" adoption.


SweetBee - No, I haven't been sick. And the weather hasn't changed drastically or anything, plus that's never seemed to be an issue with my temps anyway..but of course, now that I wrote I was sure I o'ed the other day, I'm back to the drawing board because for some reason my breasts are no longer sore, but no AF. Usually they do stop being sore the day AF comes but now, no AF. So I guess maybe my body was trying really, really hard to O and it just couldn't? Ugh, so frustrating. I'm on CD49, and no O yet??!?!?!  I really think I might have to do Clomid, but with our whole situation up in the air I just can't do it right now. DH has an interview on Monday in one of the cities we're trying to move to! So, we just might be getting out of here soon! That means we could do acupuncture, or at least Clomid. But I'm also concerned, if they don't offer him enough $ that we may be too broke to really afford good housing. We might have to move into an apt, which would feel like a huge step back, and that would also mean we couldn't afford acupuncture too. But, I'm just too old to not do anything at this point. Blah.


This is late, but welcome back MBA! Hoping the hot tub/vacation was just the thing!

post #167 of 433

oh, kyamo, i'm so sorry about your neg. you could still be too early, but i also don't want to say too much to get your hopes up because i so know how crushing that hope can be. thinking of you. hug2.gif


Beloved, ugh on pregnant women in close proximity.  but, as echoed by others, a hunch doesn't mean anything, as i can attest during many a cycle.


it looks like i might have a progesterone issue, doesn't it?  i wonder what i can do to naturally support that. i'm not sure i'm into trying the progesterone itself just yet, as it's mixed as to whether or not that will do anything.  i have tried b6 and it doesn't seem to do a thing. thanks, sweetbee. i would love to talk to my doc, and though i love her and trust her completely, she's made it clear she won't do a thing until it's been a year.  i asked her about my progesterone of 11.2 and she felt that a healthy fertilized egg will produce enough progesterone, so she is really only using the test to gauge whether a patient is ovulating.  she said that low progesterone would result in repeated pregnancy loss and not in an inability to conceive. my only argument is that what if I am having losses each month because implantation dosn't have a chance to take place before my prog. plummets. i'm tired of this. eyesroll.gif


we all are, eh? 

post #168 of 433

Sacrletjane, I would look into the spotting thing. It does not sound right. I also disagree with your doctor about getting pregnant with low progesterone. Clearly people who, e.g., have a lutel phase defect, don't get pregnant due to low progesterone.


About immune testing. If you google Dr. Beer, you will see all kinds of things. There is also a book out by him:



Basically it is a matter of two blood tests. At least the UK ladies have those sent to Chicago. I am not sure if more places in the USA do those. Also, an endometrial biopsy may be done. That's about it. However.... If one does have some type of an immune problem, there are lots of meds involved when TTC or pregnant. It does not sound like fun. However, they have a good success rate, as they get the women who have been tested for everything else. It also seems that many women who are told to do IVF and the other things and don't end up with a baby that way, actually can get pregnant naturally this way. You know... If your body attacks the embryo, even using donated cells is not going to help. It is very interesting stuff and to me just shows how little we really know. This is rather new stuff... There must be so much out there that we have no idea of, yet.


Oh... and the interesting, sad thing is that those women who have miscarriages are more and more likely to have them if they have immune issues. After each miscarriage the body gets more efficient in miscarrying. :( We really should have this testing available right away for all those with two miscarriages! It is a bit like thyroid stuff: You have to fight and go private to get good care. (I live in a country where healthcare costs basically nothing. Yet, I have had to pay everything out of pocket for my thyroid issues.) Sorry about bringing up the miscarriage stuff, I really don't want to make anyone feel worse!! I believe I read that Dr. beer said 70% of women with 3 miscarriage have immune issues. We are talking women who may have earlier had a healthy baby. I think this is very important to know, as it could help someone.


I need a fairy doctor! (Ha... Dd was given an Elmo dvd by Grandma) You know, a doctor, who would actually know about all these things. I just want to brainstorm with someone who knows more than I do and has ideas and hope for me. My thyroid doctor was amazing! She was just like that: listened and suggested things and it was really like brainstorming with someone wiser than you to come to a solution. She also was always interested in what I had learned online. She even let me start Hydrocortisone based on something I had read online, as it made sense to her, though it was different than what she normally had suggested. Loved her, but she retired.


I really would like to talk to an older woman who has gone through all this. I would like to learn how she coped and whether it gets easier. However, these women would have been infertile before the time of the web. I think that it would be a blessing and a curse. I mean then she would have had a couple of books and a doctor and that's it. I think we can drive ourselves nuts researching everything and wondering if this or that can be my problem. Maybe that makes it harder to accept and move on. You know, like in the Old Testament they talked about a woman whose womb God had closed. If one believed that, instead of that something in the body in not functioning right due to the environment or whatever, the moving on process would maybe be different.


I am going to be interviewed for an artivle and thought of what it looks like to others. If I read about someone who had an almost six-year-old child and said she was always hoping for more, I know I would feel bad for the person but feel like it is not likely to happen. It was a sad and weird experience to think of myself as if I were someone else. I still identify as being the mom to a young child. Those yearf of a little one are fast ending.

post #169 of 433
Thread Starter 


Originally Posted by LessTraveledBy View Post

I am going to be interviewed for an artivle and thought of what it looks like to others. If I read about someone who had an almost six-year-old child and said she was always hoping for more, I know I would feel bad for the person but feel like it is not likely to happen. It was a sad and weird experience to think of myself as if I were someone else. I still identify as being the mom to a young child. Those yearf of a little one are fast ending.


I am so with you.  Mine has just turned 6...  and he's definitely not a "little one" anymore.  It kills me inside that he is so definitely designed to be a big brother, but that this might never happen.  I hate that my body won't cooperate.  I hate myself that we didn't keep trying when we first started.  guilty.gif


Beloved - I SO hear you about pregnant women all around.  Why do we do these things to ourselves?  DS had a playdate yesterday with his best friend from daycare whom he hasn't seen in months...  and DH and I went too, because we get along quite well with the parents.  I completely forgot that the mother was pg again.... she was almost 5mo last time we saw them, so was only just starting to show - now she is 8mo (and is "over" being pg).


She spent the whole time smoking (for her nerves) and drinking bourbon and coke (because it's the "only" way she can handle caffeine...  and she needs caffeine or she gets headaches).




So I spent the afternoon looking at this gorgeous baby bump and wondering how that little baby was feeling.  And THEN - she asks me when we're going to have another one.  Like it's as easy for all of us as it is for her (it's her 3rd).  None of my dismissive jokes this time - I just shrugged (thankfully she changed the subject). gloomy.gif

post #170 of 433

lilmom, I hope your husband gets the job, and you can move. It must be so frustrating to be so far from medical help. And CD49 with no O. hug.gif Now I feel kind of guilty for always complaining about my long (for me) wait to O. redface.gif


scarletjane, my doctor is the same. No testing/help before 1 year. That's apparently typical here, but you're in the US, right? I have a friend there who says they usually say 1 year, but they will test you if there's something clearly weird. Spotting every cycle at 7DPO sounds not quite right. Does your doctor know about that? I'm sorry you have to be so frustrated, especially after all you've been through. hug.gif How long until you are at 1 year TTC? April, was it? It's April for me, or April 11 to be exact. Not that I'm counting down obsessively to when I will be given help or anything. winky.gif


LessTraveledBy, just wanted to send you hug.gif too. Is there any way you can get this immune testing done? If it's just a blood test, could it be sent away to a lab somewhere?



And I definitely agree we need to end this dry spell! Who's testing next?

post #171 of 433

Oh, musichug.gif That's just unfair! I can't believe that woman smoked while pregnant! People who smoke while pregnant or around their children just make me crazy upset. And it's an epidemic around here. Everyone smokes. I can't go anywhere without feeling suffocated. Today at the zoo, two women were smoking right next to us, and we have a 20-month-old. They don't even see it as wrong.


Ok, end rant. winky.gif


Except to add that drinking hard liquor while pregnant is just unbelievable, too. Here we all are not doing any of those things to hurt a baby, and none of us are pregnant. greensad.gif

post #172 of 433
Music, that is horrible that she was smoking and drinking while pregnant, and then she asked you. I am pissed angry.gif Poor little one, I hope everything turns out ok, that is dangerous greensad.gif
post #173 of 433


Edited by miriam_bat_avraham - 5/6/13 at 9:26pm
post #174 of 433

Wow, it's been ages.  It is true that Tear is pregnant with TWINS?!  I looked over the first page list and my eyes bugged.  Wowowowow.


Grats to all you lucky ones, and my thoughts to all who are still trying.  Not sure if anyone remembers me (been a few months probably since I posted :<  ) but I am finally quitting my pos job, destressing, and best of all - my husband picked out a donor, we ordered, and our first IUI is going to be in two weeks! :D


Really truly trying for real, finally.  I'm starting to become frightened lol.  After two and a half years of trying but never really expecting that slim chance to work itself out - this is a big step.

post #175 of 433
Thread Starter 

I feel a little more sane today (well, a little less irate anway....  just sad).  Until tomorrow, that is - when DS has another playdate with W.  Sigh.  Maybe tomorrow is the day I go to get my hair cut.  Then at least I won't have to see it happening.  I took my frustration out on a teriyaki beef nori handroll today... Maybe I shouldn't have (5dpo)...  but I watched it being made, so I'm thinking it was probably fresh enough not to worry about too much.  I hope.


Took DS shopping today to get a breadmaker (okay, so I just made him come with me - the breadmaker's not for him.... lol.gif ).  OMG!! April/May must have been a really boring time of year last year....  there were pg bellies EVERYWHERE!!!!!  The strange thing is...  I know if I ever do have a sticky bean that there will be a woman somewhere who is saddened by seeing my belly.  We never really know the stories, do we?  Now we all in here just need the belly!


MBA:  I'm crossing everything that your destressing hot-tubbing fun BDing vacation did the trick for you!!!!  But I didn't say that out aloud.  Did I?

Welcome back, kparker!!  joy.gifI'm so excited for you!!!  Do you want to update your blurb on the first page so I can move you and update your info?  (And yes, Tear's having twins!!  From what I've learned through stalking Sheepish.gif...  she did her ivf cycle, had 3 embies transferred and 2 stuck!!!!  It's so so exciting!!!!joy.gif)

post #176 of 433

Why yes, that's a good idea.  I'm much so now a "current" ;)


TTC #1 since 9/08 with male factor, IUI #1 with donor sperm Jan 2011.  How does that sound?

post #177 of 433
Thread Starter 

Done.  orngbiggrin.gif

Let me know if you want me to add your chart. upsidedown.gif

post #178 of 433

Certainly - I'll get that when FF is working again ><

post #179 of 433
Hi kparker wave.gif I'm still here lol.gif It's good to see you smile.gif

Yes, we are all so happy for tear joy.gif

I have a bunch of pregnant images and fertile images ready to post in my 365 blog right around O time (like that will help lol.gif) Anything's worth a try on this, my last month of intending.

music, I know I commented before, but I am appalled that a pregnant woman would do that, especially in front of everyone (not that it's okay in private) but that is child abuse, it is so awful greensad.gif

Welcome home MBA, I am hoping that the time off will be fruitful for you and you get that surprise BFP

Everyone else wave.gif

I am obsessing over photographing pregnant images (hard to explain, I'll let you know when they are up on my 365 blog)
post #180 of 433

BOOOOO! Another TWW bites the dust...guess I won't be leaving the club this month :(


(not that I don't love you ladies!)


We have my husband's grandma's viewing today and funeral tomorrow...perfect timing, AF. Way to REALLY smash us while we're down!


Hope you ladies are starting off the new year better than we are!

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