Back to work and my heart hurts. Tips?

[Lyndzies]

Hi mamas.

Today is my first day back to work since 10/6 when I started my leave (DD was born on 10/15).

Any tips on how you muscled through the first days away from your babe are appreciated.  I'm having a rough morning! 

Trying to stay calm, though, and I'm sure being upset will do nothing to help my pumping.  Lol.

Thanks in advance.  :)

[Buzzer Beater]

  

[blue butterfly]

no advice mama, but lots of big ol hugs! 

[PatioGardener]

My heart hurts in sympathy with your post! I don't go back to work for a few more months, but I get pangs just thinking about it. 

Just think of that sweet nursing session you'll have at he end of your work day

[lrgs]

Hope you are having an okay day mama. *hugs*

[Lyndzies]

Thanks so much for the hugs and support.  Not sure what I expect in terms of advice?  Haha... it was wishful thinking that there was some way to make this easier!

I'm coping, but missing her terribly.  We're very lucky to have MIL as our "daycare" so I am trying to be thankful and remind myself that at least Cady is with someone she knows, who loves her very much.

Also, my first pumping session yielded 7oz, so hooray for small victories!

:)

Thanks again, everyone.

[Buzzer Beater]

 Holy cow I would love to get that much pumping.

Hope you are doing  well this afternoon.

[caseykn]

to you mama.  I hope your first day went as well as can be.  You are lucky to have a relative you trust to watch your sweet baby.  Finding child care when DD1 was 5 months old was terribly stressful for me.  There's no easy way to get through those first days at work.  Think of your little one being with someone who loves her and know that she's safe and cared for.  I didn't have a relative to leave DD1 with but found an awesome stay at home mama to watch her and I loved hearing the stories of what they did, even if it was just that the mama, her baby son and my baby daughter all took a nap together in bed.  When that family moved away a year later, I cried like it was my own sister moving away.  Your MIL will probably have some sweet stories about what they did together, even if it's a little rough for your baby in the beginning. 

Also, your baby will most likely be overjoyed to see you at the end of your workday, but my LLL leader friend likes to tell the story of a mom who went back to work and for a couple of weeks the baby would cry and cry for for about 20 minutes when the mom picked him up in the evening.  He just needed to let out all that emotion, I guess and then he'd settle down and nurse and they'd have a normal night together.  This is a big shift in lifestyle for both of you and it'll take some time to adjust. 

Another thing I though of- When I went to work, it was doing a job that I love and feel passionate about and there's no doubt it was the right decision for me personally and for my family's finances but that didn't mean it was easy every day.  I had to remind my husband to be gentle with me about my emotions.  If I had a hard day and missed my baby and felt sad about working, responding with something like "well, we need that money you make to pay our mortgage" was not a helpful response.   I had to remind him (at a time I wasn't feeling overly emotional) that this was an emotional subject for me, logic wasn't going to make it easier and the best thing he could do was to remember to be gentle with me through the transition.  Don't be afraid to ask for what you need from your partner to make this easier for you all. 

[pisces-in-vt]

Hi Mama -

YOU ARE NOT ALONE!  It was my first day back to work today with baby #2, born 10/11!  It nearly broke my heart to leave him (at a great place and with his big sister no doubt).  I would encourage you to plan on taking all the time you need each evening to just BE with your daughter.  Dishes - laundry - even dinner - takes a backseat in my house so we can relax and cuddle and nurse.  I find that I have to try NOT to dwell too much during the day in order to be present at work, pump, bust my ass, pump, then split as soon as possible to pick them up worked with my DD last time, so is my plan now.

Also - I called THREE times today to see how he was doing. Last week I came in a few days while my DH took care of DS and he sent picture texts, which were great.  Maybe your MIL knows how to text or email pictures too?

Good luck - its nice to know that there are other mamas out there feeling the same way I do, and in the end the kids end up just dandy.

[Lyndzies]

Thanks to all; I made it through (surprise, surprise!  What did I think would happen?).  Lol. 

Pisces, I hope your day went okay, and that today is even better.  That's what I'm hoping for.  :-)

The most frustrating part of this whole thing is that by the time DP gets home with the baby, I've only got about an hour and a half with her before it's bedtime.  And, although we are one VERY BLESSED family to have a baby that sleeps through the night 10-11 hours on average, that means I don't get to see her again until the hurried rush of our new morning routine.  (Not that I'm complaining about her awesome sleeping ability, mind you.  I just miss playing and bonding with her as much as I used to!)

Anyway, thanks again for the support, mamas.  You had some especially good suggestions, caseykn.  I think a chat with DP about being gentle with me right now might be in order.  I'm sensing that I'm a bit emotionally out of whack this week.  :P

[Laurski]

Big hugs!  Today is my first day back, too.  Fortunately I'm only working part-time, and we found a great family daycare right near my job, but even now, just thinking about leaving her makes my stomach twist in knots.  She's having an especially clingy day, too (crying almost every time I put her down), which is making it even harder.  I keep watching the clock tick down to 12:30 when we have to leave--it's coming so quickly today!

[memz]

I'm going back to work in a month and I have a hard time thinking about it..even though she's going to be cared for by a friend of mine that she already knows, I still can't imagine spending a whole day without her  And my DD will be 1 yo in two weeks...I can't imagine with a tiny baby

[drobinson]

Sending big hugs your way! I remember the day I had to go back to work this past August. It was very difficult, but my DH brought our DD to work during lunch to visit me. It made the day a little more bearable. Not sure if your MIL can bring the baby for an occasional visit, but if so, it might help you transition into being away from her during the day.

[LittleBirdy]

Just a quick note to say I'm glad you made it through, and I hear you on the bedtime thing, and also I remember you from the TTC boards way back when!