checking in - we're still on track to TTC at the end of august!! only one more round of charting YAY!!
is it bad that i have already started looking at baby and maternity clothes? I am so freaking excited!!!!!!!
Hi everyone! I'd like to join the group. Here is my story:
My DH and I married in '08 at the ripe old age of 32. This is our first marriage. We began TTC right away because of the horror stories you hear about TTC when your "older." We conceived on the first try (cycle) but it didn't stick, chemical pregnancy. The following month we were pregnant again 
. We had our son the following year. When he turned a year old we decided to give it a go for number two (again worried about the whole TTC in your thirties issue). We got a BFP on second cycle. We welcomed our beautiful little girl this past February.
When we talked of having kids before we actually had any, my husband wanted four. After we had one...he thought three. During the first couple months with #1 and #2 he thought "I'm good." I've always wanted three. Now that we have settled into having two DH has become more open to three again. Matter of fact we were talking about it last night and he said let's get ahead a little financially and then we can try. I'm so happy! I looove being a Momma and feel deep inside that we are meant to be a family of five. I figure we can get our debt paid down and be ready for next year. I'll be 36 which is when I wanted to be finished and our little ones will have a 2yr spacing which I am enjoying. So...here's to waiting!
Welcome! 
I've listed you under "2012" generically, but if you want to be listed under a specific month, let me know.
How was it having two close together in the beginning? How long until it became easier if it wasn't to begin with?
checking in - we're still on track to TTC at the end of august!! only one more round of charting YAY!!
is it bad that i have already started looking at baby and maternity clothes? I am so freaking excited!!!!!!!
How exciting! I hope your TTC journey is quick.
Well, I don't think it's bad. 
No, no, I haven't done the same. Not me. I don't know what you're talking about. Okay, so it was diapers.
Welcome!
I've listed you under "2012" generically, but if you want to be listed under a specific month, let me know.
How was it having two close together in the beginning? How long until it became easier if it wasn't to begin with?
Initially it was quite the transition going from 1 kid to two. On top of that, having them close in age was a challenge. I think my son being not quite two, taking care of a newborn, and recovering pp was at times overwhelming. It took me about two months to adjust. It took my husband a little longer, he is warming up to it now.
It's definitely busier...but in a good way. I get to watch my little boy, my big baby, grow up and I listen in amazement as his vocabulary expands on a daily basis. I also get to cuddle my little baby girl and enjoy watching her learn to sit up, discover her toes etc. Plus they enjoy each other. The baby loooves watching her big brother and smiles big smiles at him constantly. He enjoys being the "big boy" who gives her her toys and let's Mama know when she is fussing. I'm enjoying the age spacing now and hope that we can have the same spacing with a third.
DS is 12 m. I would like the kids to be 2.5 years apart...but my husband will be in full time nursing school until he is 3.5 years old :-(!!!! That means I am the primary earner, but I only work 20 to 24 hours a week. I stayed home the first 11 months of DS life...which was very important to me especially due to not wanting anything to interfere with BF. (Right now I nurse him before I leave, at lunch, and when I get home). I want another baby before my husband graduates but its important to me to not have to work until new baby is at least 6 months old and preferably longer....which means it would either make my husband have to work and be stressed in school (bad idea...I really want him to succeed), or I would have to save the money for the very long leave, or I would have to go back to work sooner than I wanted and hope the pumping works out good. But since I can support us on a pretty low number of hours...maybe I could save part and work one day a week??? anyways I just dont want the kids to be 3.5 years apart because that sounds way too long but I dont want to compromise my husband's school success and I dont want to compromise the new baby bf relationship. Help please!! My ideal would be around 2 y 8 m btw.
I'm A 
Mother To DD (Ten) And DS (Seven).
For The Past Year I Have Been Wanting To Have More Babies And I'm Not Talking About One Or Two.
Noooo! I Would Like Four To Five More Before I Hit Forty.
This Is Crazy Because I Thought After My Son I Wouldn't Have Anymore.
Yes. I Miss Breastfeeding, Being Pregnant, Nursing Two Kids At Once, All The Baby Things, Carrying A Baby On My Back,
Holding A Baby, Natural Child Birth, A Mid-Wife, Doula.
*Sigh*.
I Could Go On And On.
But........I'm Waiting Until 2013 or 2014.
So Glad There Are Other Women Who Understand.
Initially it was quite the transition going from 1 kid to two. On top of that, having them close in age was a challenge. I think my son being not quite two, taking care of a newborn, and recovering pp was at times overwhelming. It took me about two months to adjust. It took my husband a little longer, he is warming up to it now.
It's definitely busier...but in a good way. I get to watch my little boy, my big baby, grow up and I listen in amazement as his vocabulary expands on a daily basis. I also get to cuddle my little baby girl and enjoy watching her learn to sit up, discover her toes etc. Plus they enjoy each other. The baby loooves watching her big brother and smiles big smiles at him constantly. He enjoys being the "big boy" who gives her her toys and let's Mama know when she is fussing. I'm enjoying the age spacing now and hope that we can have the same spacing with a third.
Thanks for sharing your experience. Your little ones seem sweet. 
DS is 12 m. I would like the kids to be 2.5 years apart...but my husband will be in full time nursing school until he is 3.5 years old :-(!!!! That means I am the primary earner, but I only work 20 to 24 hours a week. I stayed home the first 11 months of DS life...which was very important to me especially due to not wanting anything to interfere with BF. (Right now I nurse him before I leave, at lunch, and when I get home). I want another baby before my husband graduates but its important to me to not have to work until new baby is at least 6 months old and preferably longer....which means it would either make my husband have to work and be stressed in school (bad idea...I really want him to succeed), or I would have to save the money for the very long leave, or I would have to go back to work sooner than I wanted and hope the pumping works out good. But since I can support us on a pretty low number of hours...maybe I could save part and work one day a week??? anyways I just dont want the kids to be 3.5 years apart because that sounds way too long but I dont want to compromise my husband's school success and I dont want to compromise the new baby bf relationship. Help please!! My ideal would be around 2 y 8 m btw.
I'm sorry you're in such a conundrum. Would it be possible to work very PT at your job and then start nannying PT from home? Or, is it possible for you to work from home with your current job? Do you have any family close that could help you out with childcare and if so, would that be a compromise you could live with? Are you in a situation where you could and would want to move in with family to save money from now until when you have the next baby? Any chances of cutting down on your budget now? I'm just throwing out general ideas; I hope something works out for you. 
I'm A Mother To DD (Ten) And DS (Seven).
For The Past Year I Have Been Wanting To Have More Babies And I'm Not Talking About One Or Two.
Noooo! I Would Like Four To Five More Before I Hit Forty.
This Is Crazy Because I Thought After My Son I Wouldn't Have Anymore.
Yes. I Miss Breastfeeding, Being Pregnant, Nursing Two Kids At Once, All The Baby Things, Carrying A Baby On My Back,
Holding A Baby, Natural Child Birth, A Mid-Wife, Doula.
*Sigh*.
I Could Go On And On.
But........I'm Waiting Until 2013 or 2014.
So Glad There Are Other Women Who Understand.
Welcome!
Wow. Any idea what sparked your sudden baby fever? I hope your wait is short and speedy!
How funny to come upon a tribe for my EXACT situation in life right now! DD was conceived 3 mo. in to our marriage and we were super excited! I had breastfeeding infertility for about 8 months postpartum, and we conceived my son on my first cycle! Needless to say it's been a busy couple of years for us, and I love having my kids so close (17 mo) though we've had our tough moments for sure. So I'm going along happily after my son is born, and my fertility returns @ 4 months postpartum!!!! Wham- it just hit me, I was soooo not ready for a return to fertility and I was super bummed, b/c I was hoping for the same if not longer breastfeeding infertility as with my daughter. I think I know why I maybe had such an early return of fertility even while exclusively bf'ing (that's another story!) Ever since he's turned 8 months (which is the same age that my daughter was when I conceived him) I've had the baby bug- big time!!! Whenever I talked to DH about it, I got a blank stare and a million excuses. He just wasn't ready apparently. we didn't "plan" our other kids, and I don't really like "planning" this one, but with all of our circumstances, it just kind of happened that way.I know waiting has been better for us all, but now that DS is 12 mo. and I'm ovulating every month, and all of my friends seem to be getting pregnant, it's just so hard to wait! After talking to DH again, and much prayer, he has come around to thinking about it again wooohoo! So hopefully this fall or winter we can try again for baby #3 :)
Hi! I'm new around here, and I'm excited to find a "wanting but waiting" tribe which describes me exactly! I'm in grad school, and really need to finish my degree and find a job before I start thinking about pregnancy, but suddenly all I can think about is babies...It's good that DH and I are taking time to get our marriage in a good place, and I've been making healthy life changes that should make it easier to be in a healthy place for pregnancy when it's time (exercise, food choices, more natural living). Plus we have two young dogs, and it would be better if they were a little older and a little more trained before introducing a LO. So I'm CTA, learning all about my cycles (I've been on the pill for 9+ years, so I'm finally off it and re-learning my body's signals and learning charting for the first time). And I'm using this time to learn all about parenting and pregnancy and stuff, getting myself ready for long conversations with my mother who disagrees with most of my natural/un-traditional tendencies, and just keep being happy for my friends and cousins having babies till it's my time.
DS is 12 m. I would like the kids to be 2.5 years apart...but my husband will be in full time nursing school until he is 3.5 years old :-(!!!! That means I am the primary earner, but I only work 20 to 24 hours a week. I stayed home the first 11 months of DS life...which was very important to me especially due to not wanting anything to interfere with BF. (Right now I nurse him before I leave, at lunch, and when I get home). I want another baby before my husband graduates but its important to me to not have to work until new baby is at least 6 months old and preferably longer....which means it would either make my husband have to work and be stressed in school (bad idea...I really want him to succeed), or I would have to save the money for the very long leave, or I would have to go back to work sooner than I wanted and hope the pumping works out good. But since I can support us on a pretty low number of hours...maybe I could save part and work one day a week??? anyways I just dont want the kids to be 3.5 years apart because that sounds way too long but I dont want to compromise my husband's school success and I dont want to compromise the new baby bf relationship. Help please!! My ideal would be around 2 y 8 m btw.
Just thought I would say that my kids are all just over 4 years apart and it has been a really nice age difference that we have enjoyed. With my first, I had finished my schooling but my dh was still finishing his degree and I was 6.5 months pregnant with our first when we went to his graduation. That worked out really nicely. Perhaps you could do something like that. Yes, you would still have the 3.5 year age difference but it might be a nice compromise for your family. Although it is further apart than you would like, it really is not a bad age difference. Your older would have some independence and be able to help out a bit when baby arrives and still have had some nice time with you to himself. My sister and I were that age difference and we got along really well growing up. Enjoy planning. I know it can be so hard to wait once you start to get into baby mode. Just trying to show how it is not such a bad thing to have kids spread a bit more. In the end, you have to figure out what is best for your family and go with that.
How funny to come upon a tribe for my EXACT situation in life right now! DD was conceived 3 mo. in to our marriage and we were super excited! I had breastfeeding infertility for about 8 months postpartum, and we conceived my son on my first cycle! Needless to say it's been a busy couple of years for us, and I love having my kids so close (17 mo) though we've had our tough moments for sure. So I'm going along happily after my son is born, and my fertility returns @ 4 months postpartum!!!! Wham- it just hit me, I was soooo not ready for a return to fertility and I was super bummed, b/c I was hoping for the same if not longer breastfeeding infertility as with my daughter. I think I know why I maybe had such an early return of fertility even while exclusively bf'ing (that's another story!) Ever since he's turned 8 months (which is the same age that my daughter was when I conceived him) I've had the baby bug- big time!!! Whenever I talked to DH about it, I got a blank stare and a million excuses. He just wasn't ready apparently. we didn't "plan" our other kids, and I don't really like "planning" this one, but with all of our circumstances, it just kind of happened that way.I know waiting has been better for us all, but now that DS is 12 mo. and I'm ovulating every month, and all of my friends seem to be getting pregnant, it's just so hard to wait! After talking to DH again, and much prayer, he has come around to thinking about it again wooohoo! So hopefully this fall or winter we can try again for baby #3 :)
Welcome!
Isn't it hard when everyone around you seems to be pregnant?
Hi! I'm new around here, and I'm excited to find a "wanting but waiting" tribe which describes me exactly! I'm in grad school, and really need to finish my degree and find a job before I start thinking about pregnancy, but suddenly all I can think about is babies...It's good that DH and I are taking time to get our marriage in a good place, and I've been making healthy life changes that should make it easier to be in a healthy place for pregnancy when it's time (exercise, food choices, more natural living). Plus we have two young dogs, and it would be better if they were a little older and a little more trained before introducing a LO. So I'm CTA, learning all about my cycles (I've been on the pill for 9+ years, so I'm finally off it and re-learning my body's signals and learning charting for the first time). And I'm using this time to learn all about parenting and pregnancy and stuff, getting myself ready for long conversations with my mother who disagrees with most of my natural/un-traditional tendencies, and just keep being happy for my friends and cousins having babies till it's my time.
Welcome!
I listed you under "A Little Bit Longer"; let me know if you want to be listed under a specific month or year. I think it's great you're already charting. I did that with my first and it worked out really well for us because I knew my body really well.
Thank you :) I think thats really the encouragement I need right now, is a positive affirmation from those who have the distance that I will end up having...that enjoyed it. I am trying to tell myself that the reason for having another baby is not to have a playmate as much as the time needs to be right for the WHOLE family for the mental health of the whole family. It will be so much more enjoyable if I wait really. But since no one I know personally has kids that distance I had to get the message from someone else, so thank you.
Hope to start trying in 2013!! I wish it was sooner, but it is not going to be. We have a lot to work out in the meantime. We are hopefully moving into our own apartment (well with a roommate but still a better living situation then what we have currently) in a few months. We are getting married in 2012 (small probably just justice of the peace and maybe a little bit of a larger one in 2013. I am getting a later start then I expected, going to be 30 in February but I confident it will work out (or try to be)!! It helps that I am helping my best friend raise his amazing five year daughter.
Hey All!
I'm still hanging around here. We are suppose to be on next month to start TTC, but DH and I had some issues over the past month. We are doing much better now, but thought maybe we ought to lay off the baby pressure. Either way, I'm still not on BCP's right now. I am thinking we may just stop preventing in a couple months if things are still going smoothly. I'm having a seriously weird month though. I'm on Cycle day 22 and I still haven't gotten cross hairs of O and I usually O by day 18 at the latest. I think next month I will start taking Vitex just to make sure my hormones are acting 'normal'.
Hope to start trying in 2013!! I wish it was sooner, but it is not going to be. We have a lot to work out in the meantime. We are hopefully moving into our own apartment (well with a roommate but still a better living situation then what we have currently) in a few months. We are getting married in 2012 (small probably just justice of the peace and maybe a little bit of a larger one in 2013. I am getting a later start then I expected, going to be 30 in February but I confident it will work out (or try to be)!! It helps that I am helping my best friend raise his amazing five year daughter.
Welcome!
It sounds like you have a lot going on over the next few years. I imagine that will really make the time go by quickly.
Hey All!
I'm still hanging around here. We are suppose to be on next month to start TTC, but DH and I had some issues over the past month. We are doing much better now, but thought maybe we ought to lay off the baby pressure. Either way, I'm still not on BCP's right now. I am thinking we may just stop preventing in a couple months if things are still going smoothly. I'm having a seriously weird month though. I'm on Cycle day 22 and I still haven't gotten cross hairs of O and I usually O by day 18 at the latest. I think next month I will start taking Vitex just to make sure my hormones are acting 'normal'.
I hope everything works itself out on both fronts.
Hello there mamas! I've looked at this thread a few times and now I'd like to join. This past cycle I thought I was pregnant and I'm not. It's seems that this has helped me to fully realize that I do really want to have another baby. Now I'm thinking about it all the time and today I was feeling pretty sad. I just got AF two days ago. DH said a few times "Wow. You really want another baby."
It's funny because we still talk about the possibility of having three kids. We talk about what life would be like, how things would change, how we'd love to see what this next person looks like, etc. We talk about boy names and girl names. Our 5 year old daughter definitely wants another sibling too. She has been talking about it for at least a year. She'll say "You know what I miss? Babies. We need more babies." The other day she saw two of her friends with their little sister and she said "Aw, mom. That makes me want another baby too." So she's right in there with me. She imagines her other sibling taking a bath with them, riding in the car, etc.
Since I got AF, DH and I haven't had a serious conversation about if we're actually going to try or just wait and see what happens. Hopefully we can talk soon. He has been really busy with work and very tired. For him, money is an issue. Also, pregnancy stresses him out and he was slightly traumatized by the births. So we have some things to talk about. :) He also said that he's heard once people have three kids they "don't get to do anything anymore".
So wanting and waiting for now. I don't have a specific time frame. Will let you know once DH and I work some of these things out. In the meantime, looking forward to having a supportive community here.
Hello there mamas! I've looked at this thread a few times and now I'd like to join. This past cycle I thought I was pregnant and I'm not. It's seems that this has helped me to fully realize that I do really want to have another baby. Now I'm thinking about it all the time and today I was feeling pretty sad. I just got AF two days ago. DH said a few times "Wow. You really want another baby."
...So wanting and waiting for now. I don't have a specific time frame. Will let you know once DH and I work some of these things out. In the meantime, looking forward to having a supportive community here.
I definitely understand how getting your period (when you thought you were pregnant) makes you realize you really want to be pregnant. I hope your wait is short.
Well we had the talk about what we are going to do now a couple of nights ago. While DH says he still wants to have another baby, he still doesn't feel ready yet :(. I'm bummed because I've been waiting for at least two years until I felt like I was out of the scary period at school..which I am now. As of this month, if I get pregnant right now, my due date would be AFTER my classes end. DH won't give me a time period..he just says he has to tell me when he feels ready. So that is also sort of a bummer as I have no idea what we are in for. I do agree with him though that we need to make sure that we are both on a good page together though before plunging into this big decision. It just sucks that I'm so baby hungry!. I feel like I've been waiting for years to make sure that a baby wouldn't interfere with school, and as of this month, we are now officially out of the scary period. If I got pg right now, the baby would be due AFTER my classes end. Plus, Ds turned 4 in March and the age gap is getting bigger and bigger all the time. Anyway, I'll keep you all posted....
Oh this is the perfect thread, can I join in?
It's hard to find a place for someone who is "wanting but waiting", I'm so glad I found you all!
My name is Heather and DH and I have been married 3 years next week (how did time fly by so fast??) and 8 years together next May. We live at the beach in Ventura County in Southern California and we are in love with it. We went through some rough financial times before we got here and things are much more stable now so while we have considered having a child before it was never a good time. Although at this point I realize it never will be perfect timing, DH works nights as a bartender an hour away and also is starting school full-time to be a pilot and I work from home a lot but spend many lonely nights by myself while he is working plus we aren't as financially stable as I would like but we have a lot of expenses helping my Mom out and trying but failing miserably at saving money.
I can't believe we are at the age now where people are telling us to get started, I'm 30 this year and DH just turned 31. MIL and even my Mom have said, "Just do it already". But they're right, we wanted to start many times but it was never the "right" time and here we are, 3 years later and it still isn't but we'll have to make it work. We have basically decided to start next April, by then we will hopefully have some money saved and we'll have a better idea of what school will be like for him and he will be able to get most of it out of the way and maybe my Mom won't be so dependent on us. Plus we are looking forward to a road trip we have planned across the US from CA to FL to visit his grandparents and stop for some fun in New Orleans, LA where I have been dying to go for the last 20 years!
But even though we have so much to look forward to it feels so far away sometimes and I wonder if something else will happen that will make us push back our date again. And who knows, we may have trouble conceiving, lord knows I probably should have been pregnant at some point or another in my adolescent days but it never happened, I'm hoping I was just a very lucky girl. In the meantime I will try to enjoy being where I am and just learn everything I can so I can be as prepared as possible when the time comes.
Thanks for reading, I'm so glad I have a place to be now.
Wanted to update here! I'm pregnant! Baby #3 arriving in our home sometime in April 
Welcome MrsJJ! It's true, there's no time that is really the 'right' time. I don't think I would have ever gotten to the part that I PLAN to have kids if I didn't get the surprise that brought me Ds 4 years ago! Now I contribute a lot of my aching womb to the fact that he is getting older and I want to give him a sibling..
Congrats tellmemore!!
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