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I lost my baby girl today (WARNING mentions infant death in some detail)

post #1 of 44
Thread Starter 

She was six weeks old. Her birth was a totally fine surprise breech, she was a great nurser, had already gained a pound and a half past her birth weight, and seemed totally healthy.

On the way home from a walk to the store in the early am, she started fussing because she was hungry. I couldn't get her to latch on and she stopped fussing about halfway home. I assumed she had fallen asleep like she normally would on a walk. When I took her out of the sling to nurse she wasn't breathing. Her dad called 911 immediately and the paramedics showed up within 5-10 mintues. She had a pulse when they left for the hospital but after several rounds of cpr with oxygen and shots of epinephrine and various other treatments, they could not detect and heart movement via ultrasound....

I feel so terrible that she was cuddled up right next to me and I didn't notice that she had stopped breathing.

post #2 of 44

I am so very sorry for your loss. Love and light to you.  

post #3 of 44

I am so sorry, mama. :hug:

post #4 of 44

I'm so, so sorry, mama. I can't even begin to imagine how you must be feeling.

post #5 of 44

I am very sorry for your loss. hug.gif

post #6 of 44

I am so sorry for your tragic loss ... so, so sorry.

post #7 of 44
I am so very sorry. You are in my thoughts.
post #8 of 44

I am so very sorry. I am sending you thoughts of strength.

post #9 of 44

I'm so sorry for your loss.  Wishing you peace and strength.

post #10 of 44

oh this is heartbreaking.  i am so so sorry.  do the doctors have any idea what happened?  my firstborn died just after birth, he never breathed on his own.  the pain is unbearable.  a great website for grief, which i went to all the time, is www.nationalshare.org.  SO much support there, and they have a chat.

 

blessings.

post #11 of 44
Oh mama... I am so sorry for your loss. hug2.gif
post #12 of 44

I'm so sorry.  It just breaks my heart that you are going through this.  greensad.gif

 

The what-ifs will always eat away at you, so try to be gentle with yourself.  After my dd was stillborn years ago, it's like I had to relive in my mind over and over that last day to see if I would have done anything different.  And you know, we all do the best we can as mothers.  I kept thinking of 'this thing' and 'that thing' I would have done differently and in reality, I did the best I could.  Talk to others who are going through/have gone through the loss of a child.  The only comfort I found was knowing I wasn't alone.  hug2.gif

post #13 of 44

I'm so very sorry, mama.

post #14 of 44

I am so so very sorry for your loss. I know there are no words to make any of this easier on you or your family. Lots of love and virtual hugs are coming your way. <3

post #15 of 44

I am so sorry Mama.  

post #16 of 44

I'm so sorry mama. peace and comfort in this difficult time.

post #17 of 44

hug.gif I'm so very sorry for this terrible loss. Be gentle with yourself. 

post #18 of 44

I"m so sorry.

post #19 of 44

candle.gif So very sorry for your loss. Wishing you the space to grieve and healing vibes as you work through all your feelings. goodvibes.gif

post #20 of 44

Oh, mama.  I am so, so sorry.  candle.gif  I will be thinking of your dear, sweet baby tonight and wish you peace.

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