my dd makes "pictures" with her yoni (wtf?)

[downvalleygirl]

i've been trying to figure out exactly what my 3.5 yo dd is doing - it's like she's holding her breath.  she does it when we're driving so she'll be in her car seat and she'll like, stiffen up and hold her breath and her face turns red.  i'm all "what are you doing?" she tells me "i'm making tickle pictures with my hoo-hoo."  

i haven't made a big deal out of it with her.  my response has been, "oh."  but, i'm having the darndest time figuring out exactly what she is doing.  is she squeezing really hard?  why is she so into this?  and she's touching herself with her doll house pieces.  she says she's putting things in her yoni, but i know she's not (she can't put a doll house ladder in her yoni).  

i know there's this exploration phase going on but the hoo-hoo pictures are sorta freakin' me out.

any advise/experience with this?

[meemee]

oh man welcome to the world of VAGINAS!!!! ever heard of a vagina fart? 

we've had acting vaginas. we've had vee vee sleepy days. 

could she have seen a boy pee and wants to emulate that.

at that age my dd wanted a penis sooo bad. she had a ketchup bottle (those typical red plastic ones) that she held during her shower and 'peed' to her hearts content. 

lol its freaking you out and here i am laughing my head off thinking wow what a creative girl. 

[4Marmalade]

Well, my dd1 does a kind of wriggling thing where it looks like she's tightening and releasing over and over again.  She does it rarely now and in private as she's 5 but I know when she could explain it well she said it tickled and felt good.  When she was younger she went through a phase where it felt like she was doing it constantly.     

[downvalleygirl]

lol meemee!  isn't that called a queef?  

the feel-good thing at 3.5 is what's sorta freakin' me out, but maybe she'll be an early bloomer!

[lookatreestar]

i would just keep doing what you are doing. def seems in the range of normal to me 

[Llyra]

All of my kids have done that sort of self-exploring or self-pleasuring thing from early on. Heck, DS never left his penis alone, for the first four months he spent out of diapers. My girls do it less than DS does, but they do it. DD1 went through a long phase of rubbing on the corner of my coffee table when she was small, and DD2 clenches and rubs on a bunched up piece of bedcovers, or just squeezes her legs close together. It's normal and healthy and doesn't mean anything at all except that they're taking innocent joy in what their bodies can do.

Once they get to around 4 or 5, though, it's definitely time to start talking about them not doing stuff like that in public, especially at school or in front of peers. I don't make an issue out of it-- I just let them know that some people would think it was weird, and that while it's okay to do, it's probably better to do privately. That's social information they need to know, and you can do it without turning it into some kind of moral issue.

[downvalleygirl]

thank you everyone!  i feel much better now.  i always knew boys did all kinds of penis play but didn't realize 3yo girls did with their yonis - but makes perfect sense.  

[averlee]

My daughter (3.5) has these certain panties she'll pull up extra hard every time. I'm like, What are you doing? And she goes, "it feels kinda good like that". Anyhow I think your little one is probably pushing against the car seat strap in a similar way.

As an aside, when I was teaching preschool, I noticed that many/most little ones will press, rub, or touch themselves at least sometimes. I came to realize that it isn't an unusual behavior at all.

[Lillitu]

I was a girl that discovered my genitalia pretty early on and had my own word for masturbation. It could be your daughter has the same thing going on. "tickle pictures" = masturbation.

[darcytrue]

My 15 month old touches herself down there constantly while in the bath tub and during diaper changes. She's my third and I'm used to it but she does seem to do it more often and a little earlier than my older two did. :)    Completely normal IMO.

[meemee]

i know its a little freaky but if you think of pleasure = comfort rather than we equate pleasure = sex  you might feel better.

i recall my dd doing it at that age when she was completely relaxed. didnt matter if she had clothes on or not. mostly not. but she'd sit and have one arm over her head and one arm in her underwear, relax on the couch and watch her movies. i guess it didnt freak me out too much coz i barely recall it, and she was never ever inappropriate in public so i did not have to do the 'do it in private' talk. 

but as others have said, its a normal phase that kids do esp. when they are relaxed or falling asleep. i have seen at my dd's dc and my friend's dc - kids rubbing themselves as they were falling asleep. most stopped by 4 but a few went on till they went to K.

lol i didnt know qweef. lol 

[mad4mady]

DD is 8 now but when she was around 4 almost turning 5 I noticed her touching and exploring herself. I did not say anything at the moment she was doing it but, rather waited till a later time and I brought it up that it is okay for her to explore her body, it is totally normal and okay to do but, it is important to do that when she is by herself and not in front of others. By the time she was 5 I didn't notice her doing it anymore, I am sure it is still happening but, she has learned to do it when she is by herself. 
 

I think the most important thing is to not make an issue out of it and just help them learn when it is appropriate to do that.

[downvalleygirl]

LOVE all the insight/experiential advise and info on this - thanks again!