Muslim Mamas 2011 - Page 7

[1jooj]

Mabrook,Noorjahan! May she be a light in your eyes!

LOL on the lights. Jumeirah Mosque in Dubai is absolutely draped in them. Of course, isn't this the capital of "imitating unbelievers?!"

We took a drive to Oman last week. It's beautiful, and I look forward to going back. Perfumes and incense everywhere.

I am so proud of my children! Ds and dd both have fasted this month. Dd needed a few days break here and there (she's 7), but has done great! And ds got sick and lost a week when he needed to take antibiotics (Muslim doc insisted he break his fast) for an infection he brought back from Morocco. But they fasted nearly the whole month, and now dd knows she can do it. Major milestone in terms of her self-confidence. They have also taken opportunities to act charitably, and for this I am also pleased.

On that note, please consider helping Somalis in the days ahead. May Allah multiply our generosity.

[umsami]

Mabrook! Masha'Allah!! Enjoy that precious little girl. :)

[1jooj]

Eid Mubarak!

I have to say, this has been one of the most challenging Ramadans I can remember. Not because of the heat of the UAE, but the isolation of having moved to a new place, knowing absolutely no one, during a season when everyone leaves town and it's too hot to be out in the world to meet anyone anyway. But we survived and made it for Eid prayers (at 6 in the morning! wow! and they happen on time here, not half an hour after they say, like back home...).

We will likely celebrate Eid by taking the kids to the beach, water bottles and all, and grilling out in the afternoon.

I hope you all had a blessed month filled with fasting, forgiveness, generosity, kindness and charity.

We took the kids out to a mall (where else in Dubai, right?) last night, and the lines were hours long at the Red Crescent counter. The zakat-al-fitr tent outside the grocery store was absolutely bustling. While we were left cold in terms of socializing with our brothers and sisters this year, we were truly heartened to see the financial generosity. Has been a lot of support and donations to Somalia, millionaires paying off debts for imprisoned debtors (which also put the spotlight on the practice of imprisoning debtors), etc. We don't have the millions but we do what's within our means, and I pray Allah accepts it from all of us, from richest to poorest.

My dh did nearly fall prey to one of the "classic" Ramadan/Eid scams last night, but luckily he was caught without cash at that moment. 

[noorjahan]

Eid mubarak! Wish you all a wonderful Eid!

My baby is really sweet, I only wish she would cry less, okay lot less!

[ZakareyasMama]

MashAllah! Eid Kareem to all!


I have some goals for myself before next Ramadan. I wasn't able to do as much as I wanted to this year and I think if I can improve my Arabic and Quran reading it would help. Does anyone have any recommendations for learning to read Quran? I know a little but I need more help!


InshAllah you all have a blessed Eid.

[Liquesce]

I've heard that the Madina course books and lecture series available freely online are helpful.  You can download the textbooks series, worksheets, etc here: http://www.lqtoronto.com/downloads.html and the video class lectures here: http://www.lqtoronto.com/videodl.html .  Pretty sure you can also find the full video series on YouTube, or you can probably find torrent files so it's not all split up like that, if you're interested.

[Amatullah0]

Can you read arabic? When I was learning to read, I memorized the alphabet, I always had a sheet with the letters(and transliterated sounds) nearby. I still get confused for a second sometimes with letters like jeem and ha and khaa, but alhamdulillah it has improved with practice. Another thing that made it easier to learn was getting a transliterated tajweed qur'an that had the arabic on the opposite page. (this: http://www.easyquranstore.com/Tajweed-Quran-with-Translations-and-Transliterations/) I also took a tajweed class, and became involved in a halaqa that did word to word translation(and broke the word down to the root) based off of farhat hashmi's classes (http://www.alhudainstitute.ca/)

For me, memorizing arabic roots was the easiest way for me to learn. I am certainly not done, and I don't understand the entire qur'an or anything, but I do understand a lot of portions, and I know the meaning of everything that I say in the salah, and of the surahs that I have memorized alhamdulillah, and it's not because I've memorized the translation(I haven't) but because I actually know what the words mean.

[Amatullah0]

This wasn't DS's first eid, but the first time he got to participate in the excitement of it, since he's older now. I made him a felt board(based off of the one here: http://anaashad.blogspot.com/2010/03/craft-time-la-la-la.html) and a doll that I gave him a few days prior to eid, since he had tried to potty his other baby by actually sticking it in the toilet (ewwww!)

I'm wondering, when do you give eid presents? I think I'd like to make a tradition out of WHEN, inshallah.

I was seriously tempted to give him his present at iftar time, when eid had officially started, but thought that it was a bad idea because he would want to stay up all night playing with it! We were in a rush to get to eid salah in the morning(and we usually are), so that time doesn't really work, so I ended up giving it to him when we came home from eid salah, but at that time we usually skype with DH's family before we rush off to visit friends. 

[ZakareyasMama]

Thanks for the advice... Yes I do know the alphabet but I feel kind of stuck there, you know? InshAllah I think I need practice and a set time for myself to study. I will definitely check out that website too!

My in laws give Eid gifts right after maghrib, but there are not little kids, just babies, so I don't know what they would do for kids. I know for me I wish there was more to do, more of a feeling of celebration on Eid. I think it's just the community where my in laws live I don't know anyone and they don't seem to have much going on. Maybe when the babies get older inshAllah we will have more special activities.

[umsami]

I really recommend Bayyinah's DVD course (or ideally their in-person course).  It's expensive--but the only thing that worked for me after years of trying to learn.  It's geared to English-language natives, which helps I think.   I also recommend any of their lectures--many of which you can find on YouTube. :)

bayyinah.com

Originally Posted by ZakareyasMama 



MashAllah! Eid Kareem to all!


I have some goals for myself before next Ramadan. I wasn't able to do as much as I wanted to this year and I think if I can improve my Arabic and Quran reading it would help. Does anyone have any recommendations for learning to read Quran? I know a little but I need more help!


InshAllah you all have a blessed Eid.

[Fitrah]

Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullah,

I have been reading this thread off and on, but am not sure if I every posted. I just wanted to respond to the arabic reading/tajweed questions. I had the same problem of studying the letters but having trouble reading fluently. In our tajweed class we use al qaida norani method of reading and learning tajweed. You can practice the lessons free at this site http://tardeed.com/default.asp?LANG=2&mid= I like the way they break down the lesson, it helps a lot in learning how things go together in reading. May Allah bless you and your families!

[umsami]

Re: Eid gifts, we try and stretch them out for all three days.  First gifts are usually given after Eid prayers when we get home.  DH also give Eidee (money) and he'll do it then.  It's typically $1/each year the kid is old.  Not a lot at this point, but our kids are still very excited.  I have no idea if we'll stick with the $1/year thing or not.  I also like the stretching out bit because they're not overwhelmed.  They play with one new gift each day and can sort of focus.  We also try and do new clothes and shoes, but those are just sort of put on in the morning before the prayer.  We will have gone out shopping together sometime during Ramadan for them and they know that they're for Eid.

We used to do everything right after Eid prayers on the first day, but I really like stretching it out.  Even though DH usually only takes the first day off for work (and when they had school, we only took off the first day), it still helps reiterate that it's a multi-day holiday.  We'll also try and do different fun things each day... so go out for ice cream, go to Chuck E. Cheeses, etc.

On a totally different note, I bought myself Zaid Shakir's translation of "Treatise for the Seekers of Guidance" as my Eid gift ;)  and it's really great.  I highly highly recommend it.

[frugalmama]

Asalaam Alaikum everyone, 

1st post here in this thread since I started studying Islam a few months back. Is anyone else or has anyone else taken the ICNA / Gainpeace Islam 101 classes online? There is a session starting tomorrow and I'm looking for a study and discussion buddy. Registration is still open if anyone is interested. 

[ZakareyasMama]

Wa alaikum salaam and welcome

Sorry I don't know anything about those classes, but I hope they are helpful to you.

Inshallah Eid will be here in just about a month. It will be my little family's first Eid together at home since my son was born. (last Eid we were at the in law's) I really want to do something nice... Anyone planning anything?

Also I think someone posted something about this before... Do y'all do like little gifts for co workers, neighbors or doctor's office staff at Eid? I wanted to bring some food or something and put a little card with it explaining what Eid is and why we celebrate. I guess I didn't know what to write exactly. I don't want to be superficial but I also don't want to write something too long they won't read it!

InshAllah everyone is doing well!

[Amatullah0]

Check out http://medynachocolates.com/index.html someone I know through an email list runs it. The chocolates come in packs great for gift giving, and come with a note about what eid is, and not a terrible price, either. I think they only have the ones for eid ul fitr up, but I'm pretty sure they'll have eid ul adha ones out closer to eid inshallah. 

If they don't have exactly what you're looking for, you could ask them to do a custom order, inshallah. I do believe that they do custom orders, but I'm not 100% certain. 

[1jooj]

I brought baklava in at my office last year, and sent out a quick email to let people know it was in the kitchen, and why. It opened conversations about our celebrations, and that was nice.

Mamas, I am not loving life in Dubai. It has been a very hard (almost) 5 months. Ramadan was just the worst, so incredibly isolating. Eid was...anonymous. It was so hard. Summer, of course, was painfully hot, and only now is it cooling enough that I can be outside for a few hours a day (early AM) to get some exercise. There are mom meetups, coffee mornings, that kind of thing, but I don't always have a car and it just seems an awfully big production to dress up and take a cab to a mall to order a cup of coffee and take a gamble on who I'll meet there. No one chats at the mosques here, and people don't chat each other up much in public. I've chatted with people at school events, but it goes nowhere. I've met a couple other women, but everyone is also very busy with life, running kids for school and stuff, that it's just really difficult to connect. Dh has been out of the country the past two weeks, kids are in school, and I have been seriously flirting with depression. After living in a Muslim country on the other end of the Islamic world, I don't know what to make of this culture. 

We did make one new friend this week (kids and I): their new tutor. She seems lovely, and inshallah we'll see her twice a week, so that's a help.

Also, I was offered a job yesterday. I think I am going to take it, for all the reasons--earn a little money, keep myself occupied, meet people.

That said, I am thinking about returning home with the kids permanently, after the school year ends. I unequivocally do not like this place. We're planning a winter break trip, maybe we'll do a spring break, too, and my parents are planning to come in January. I'm trying hard to help the kids get as much as they can out of this year, because there's a good chance it could be the only year we take. We'll see, though. Maybe with a normal summer break back home with family, we can survive here together for a couple more years. Please pray for my persistence and patience.

[Liquesce]

1jooj, .  I wish I had some helpful advice.

ZakareyasMama~ I might be inclined to give out cookies or something just with a mention that it's for Eid, and elaborate if someone asks.  I don't know.  I'm bad at finding the line between explaining and appearing to be giving out unwanted proselytism, so I usually just err on the side of quiet.

And frugalmama, I hope the classes are helpful to you.  :)  I'm not really familiar with them either.

[ZakareyasMama]

1jooj I'm so sorry to hear this is your experience. I know a family who was there for about two years and the sister had a very similar and isolating time.. She actually ended up getting into some pretty big trouble with all of her free time and they are now divorced inshAllah such a thing would not happen to you and your family, but just be cautious and guard yourself from it. Make istikhara and follow your intuition. InshAllah your family will end up closer because of this experience!

[kangamitroo]

1jooj, i'm so sorry that things have been so very hard for you. InshaAllah this job will help, and the tutor's company, too. may Allah swt make things easier for you. i hope inshaAllah there are some small blessings to brighten your days and make your load easier, anything that will help you find the good and offer praise. i hope there is some very pleasant surprise in store, to make your time abroad more joyful.

noorjahan, i don't think i ever posted to say congratulations to you on your daughter's birth. i hope the days with your baby are going well inshaAllah.

if any of you know a lovely khutbah or essay related to eid al adha, i'd love to listen/read. the idea of being willing to sacrifice a child, even when Allah swt in mercy prevented the sacrifice, is very, very hard for me. i've been looking for ages for a way to help me view this in a joyful/prayerful way. i tried to talk with one usually-reliable sister about my lack of submission on this, but our conversation did not give me any breakthrough. JAK

[kangamitroo]

Originally Posted by kangamitroo 
if any of you know a lovely khutbah or essay related to eid al adha, i'd love to listen/read. the idea of being willing to sacrifice a child, even when Allah swt in mercy prevented the sacrifice, is very, very hard for me. i've been looking for ages for a way to help me view this in a joyful/prayerful way. i tried to talk with one usually-reliable sister about my lack of submission on this, but our conversation did not give me any breakthrough. JAK

i still am looking for ideas, but wanted to share some helpful things i heard in Zaid Shakir's eid al adha sermon from 2010. (1) he mentioned the need to reflect on Ibrahim's life [as opposed to the one act on which i feel stuck], since Ibrahim lay down a path for us. Ibrahim smashed the idols, and today "the idols of the nafs is what we have to smash....smash that idol with the worship of Allah swt." (2) Zaid Shakir pointed out Ismail's response: "Father, I am here to make it easy for you to submit." He asked, when do we make things easy for others?

i think overall i am left with a need to pray and reflect on submission. thanks for listening, ladies.