In lieu of freaking out at my husband for the 3rd time this week, I figured I'd come here to get some emotions out. My dd is almost 2 yrs old. My full-time job is very fulfilling, challenging, and I work for a company that is very supportive of working mothers.
I guess with the age my daughter is at, though, I'm just finding it so hard to not be her primary caregiver. Just today, for instance, she sat on the toilet for the first time, showed that she knows her colors, and learned a couple new words. And I missed all of that. I still feel like, as her mama, it should be my call when she's ready to sit on the toilet (not my mil's), but then I think, well, I'm not her primary caregiver so what do I know? I'm just so sad to be missing out on all this.
On top of it all, and I guess the hardest part, is that when I am home, I really want to make the most of the 2 hours I have with dd before bedtime...but she completely falls apart as soon as I'm home. She cries, fusses, and whines (or just completely melts down) most of the time between when I walk in the door and bedtime (depsite having my husband take care of dinner, wearing her, nursing, etc...). I know it's a rough time of day for kiddos her age, but it tries my patience so much since I just want to be able to enjoy that time together.
I guess it's just one of those days where I'm feeling at the end of my rope....wondering if it's all worth it for a career. Frankly, I don't think I would necessarily thrive as a SAHM, but I just wish it weren't so dang hard all the time. I'm hoping it's partly her age...I know this is a tough age for babes and mamas, and I'm hopeful that as she gets older, the balance will be easier to come by? Any thoughts/advice/tips from other working parents is greatly appreciated....