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If things didn't go perfect at your last HB, did/will you attempt another?

post #1 of 41
Thread Starter 

I'm fertile again, and while we are not trying and are avoiding pregnancy (via charting), I keep thinking about when and if we get pregnant again, if we'll have another HB. We transferred twice in DS's delivery (once in labor for bradycardia) and after for PPH due to retained placenta. All in all, I"m so happy I had my HBAC, DS was perfect, and I'm so happy with the way my MWs handled the situations. So happy, I couldn't have asked for better healthCARE. Love them. 

 

But I wonder if it could happen again and if I should consider the possiblity of a hospital birth again. I don't want that, I'd love another HB, but minus the hemmorage, of course.

 

Has anyone else had a HB with complications/transferred and then went on to plan another HB? If not, why?

post #2 of 41

I am still in early pregnancy, but I am tentatively planning a homebirth again. For my last birth, I had to transfer to the hospital because my waters were broken for more than 24 hours.  I have my first appointment with my midwife on Tuesday and I want to have a long talk with her about everything that happened last time and process it.  I am not 100% that I want to attempt homebirth this time, because the transfer was so rough. I plan to meditate on it and see if the answer becomes clear later in pregnancy.  Good luck to you!

post #3 of 41

We transferred with our last HB for exhaustion after a loooong labor.  DH was never happy about the HB -- we fought about it all the way through our last pregnancy -- and he was particularly nervous about trying it again after our transfer experience.  We're planning a hospital birth with a MW this time, and I think it'll be ok (she comes well-recommended  by our HB MW and the hospital is really good at natural birth). 

 

Part of the reason for choosing a hospital birth is anxiety that my labor will be long and hard like the last one, and that I'll end up needing to transfer again.  I was NOT happy with my transfer experience, in general, though it could have been much worse. 

 

Most of the reason for choosing the hospital this time is really DH, though.  It's nice not having to do battle with him every single time the question of birth comes up.  I don't have energy for that fight a second time around.  The whole experience of this pregnancy has been more gentle and calm as a result.  And I'm feeling a bit relieved, honestly, to avoid some of the hassles of the HB prep that we went through last time.  I still wish I could have my gentle, peaceful HB... but I think it won't happen as long as DH is the father of the baby. 

post #4 of 41

I have  not experienced this, but my good friend had a hb and a hemmorage that resulted in transfer.  With her next baby, she was worried about hemmorage again, so she went to a free standing birth center that was right by a hospital (thinking that at least transfer would be more seamless). She didn't have any problems with that birth and went on to have two more children at home after that. I know in her case, she was initially worried that a hemmorage was inevitable. In her case, it turned out not to be.

 

As far as that's concerned, I will say that I had "excessive bleeding" with my first baby, but not with my subsequent 3.  No rhyme or reason either.  It wasn't so severe that I had to be transferred, but it made me realize that most of the time, each birth is different and you have to go with what brings you the most peace and confidence. Best of luck in figuring out where to birth.

post #5 of 41

My first was a long, excruciating back labor. (transition with my 2nd was what the entire labor felt like with my first.. UGH!) We decided to transfer about 24 hours *after* I was fully dilated. I really, really didn't want to go to the hospital. I ended up with a c-section due to dd's position. 

 

tried again with the 2nd for hbac, and was successful. He had shoulder dystocia and required resuscitation. After being given a little time, he perked up and was fine. No transfer necessary.

 

I will, no question, have future babies at home. I do not see how being in a hospital would be any better in the possible, 10% chance of recurrence, SD. I do, however, see how being in a hospital would make it SO much worse. (caving for an epi in transition, not being able to get on all 4s, episiotomy, cord cutting, etc) 

post #6 of 41
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Comtessa View Post
Most of the reason for choosing the hospital this time is really DH, though.  It's nice not having to do battle with him every single time the question of birth comes up.  I don't have energy for that fight a second time around.  The whole experience of this pregnancy has been more gentle and calm as a result.  And I'm feeling a bit relieved, honestly, to avoid some of the hassles of the HB prep that we went through last time.  I still wish I could have my gentle, peaceful HB... but I think it won't happen as long as DH is the father of the baby. 


We were astounded by how we were treated at the hospital. Now, I'm sure most of that was because we were a HB transfer, but my DH could not get over it, he still talks about it (he's from overseas). I don't think he would ever prefer another hospital birth over a HB, unless it was an emergency case, so I wont have to fight that battle. 

 

I can completely relate with you feeling relieved though, it took a bit of prep for the HB and then there was the worry of paying for the birth and delivering in the hospital in the end...



Quote:
Originally Posted by homemademom View Post

I have  not experienced this, but my good friend had a hb and a hemmorage that resulted in transfer.  With her next baby, she was worried about hemmorage again, so she went to a free standing birth center that was right by a hospital (thinking that at least transfer would be more seamless). She didn't have any problems with that birth and went on to have two more children at home after that. I know in her case, she was initially worried that a hemmorage was inevitable. In her case, it turned out not to be.

 

As far as that's concerned, I will say that I had "excessive bleeding" with my first baby, but not with my subsequent 3.  No rhyme or reason either.  It wasn't so severe that I had to be transferred, but it made me realize that most of the time, each birth is different and you have to go with what brings you the most peace and confidence. Best of luck in figuring out where to birth.



Wow that is so good to hear that PPH wasn't reoccurring with you or your friend. Definitely something I'll be researching in either case. 



Quote:
Originally Posted by LiLStar View Post
I will, no question, have future babies at home. I do not see how being in a hospital would be any better in the possible, 10% chance of recurrence, SD. I do, however, see how being in a hospital would make it SO much worse. (caving for an epi in transition, not being able to get on all 4s, episiotomy, cord cutting, etc) 


And I keep reminding myself of why I wanted to HB last time and they all override my 'what if' feeling. God how I'd hate to be pinned to the bed, monitored constantly, and be told what to do and when to do it! 

 

THanks ladies for giving me considerations...

post #7 of 41

Quick hx...my first was a c-section after 24 hours of labor and 2 hours of pushing...I would have been better off at home without all the interventions!  Second was a repeat c-section (selfish reasons and lack of education), third was a med-free hospital birth thanks to an amazing midwife who waived all the usual monitoring, checks, etc.  My fourth was a homebirth with shoulder dystocia but thankfully NO issues once delivered.  I'm now pregnant with my 5th and of course terrified of another SD after reading what "could" have gone wrong.  But that will in no way deter me from having another homebirth!  I wouldn't want it any other way.

post #8 of 41

Yes -- my 4th child was born at home and then I transported for pph/retained placenta. I was incredibly devastated by the situation. When I got pregnant with #5, I planned another homebirth, even though I was really nervous. My midwife and I talked about it at length, and I encouraged her to be very conservative with my blood loss, to avoid another transport.

 

On Christmas I gave birth to my 5th at home, and it was PERFECT. Honestly, the birth could not have been better. 

 

Here's a link to my birth story.

post #9 of 41

I had a transfer as well and am planning another HB.  All in all I found the process of transfer fine - it felt to me the way things "should" be.  I think I could have stayed at home and been fine but the circumstances under which I transferred were reasonable to me.  I never really looked at it as a "failed" HB, in fact, I looked at it as the way birth in my area should work in most cases - try for home and then if  need be used additional services, yk?  

.  

I did end up with a bit of retained something and, ironically (or not ; -))  , it was my HB MW who acknowledged it.  She helped me expel the placenta right there in the hospital all while the doctor insisted that my uterus was shrinking just fine.  I got a bag of blood from the hospital that, although I didn't need it for survival, helped me recover far quicker so I was happy for that as well.  

 

I am a bit worried about PPH and want to try some things at home to prevent it from happening again.  

 

Anyway, although I didn't consider switching to the hospital this time around, I think I can still relate to some of what you all are feeling.  

post #10 of 41

I transferred for poor fetal heart tones with my first. If I can convince DH to TTC #2 I'll be planning another homebirth. The transfer wasn't awful. My MW's backup took us and she was really wonderful. But I would have given my left arm (the one with the #@$*! IV in it) to be home in my own bed without people poking and prodding me every couple of hours.

post #11 of 41

Everything turned out ok but I wasn't completely satisfied with how things turned out with my midwife.

 

I am not planning another child (not because of birth trauma, though) but DH and I have sometimes discussed "would we do it again?" Frankly, my answer is utterly from the gut and not the head - no matter any points that I might consider in favor of a hospital birth, I just couldn't do it, not as Plan A anyway. I would feel so stressed and like everything was a battle. I went nicely into laborland with DD, and I don't think I could risk that at the hospital (for fear of missing something that a nurse or a doctor said they wanted to do) and that would be just excruciating. Plus I'd be stressed anyway since I have hearing and vision disabilities and would be constantly anxious about what I was missing, some clue that they were going to do something invasive (and would of course never ask me my permission for). I just don't have it in me to deal with all that, not unless it was a transfer.

 

All I can say is that if I did it again, I would be a lot more skilled at interviewing potential midwives. But while I would hope to trust my chosen midwife very much, DH and I now know that we are 110% responsible for our children, and if we're not happy with something, we don't care if it's a midwife or a doctor or the Pope, we will take matters into our own hands. Which is something I can live with, definitely.

 

Short answer is, yes, I'd do another homebirth.

post #12 of 41

I just want to comment that this is why it is so important that women have these healthcare choices.  In my state, homebirth with a care provider is illegal.  There are no birth centers and no midwives delivering in hospitals.  That is why we are fighting.  Anyway, I am currently pregnant with our fourth child.  We had a HBA2C nearly two years ago and i transferred because I was 36.5 weeks and tore like you'd never believe.  I could'n't count the stitches my OB put in me and he mentioned it was nearly the worst he'd ever seen (I pushed with too much force, midwife couldn't stop it).  Anyway, I was bleeding a lot.  It is definitely a personal decision and we are deciding on another homebirth.  Blessings to you in the future.  As someone else stated above, I could not have a hospital delivery as my plan A.  No way.  So many of my friends just don't understand but they have never delivered at home.  But, like I said, it is personal.  I will pray that you will find peace in whatever you choose.

post #13 of 41

Don't know if I'll ever have another baby, but my oldest dd is pregnant and using my last MW. I had a horrible birth experience w/her and it's dredging up some weird feelings.

post #14 of 41

I had a hb for my first and planned a hb with my 2nd and transferred for FTP.  I went on to have the next 5 at home.  #8 was another transfer for PIH.  That hospital experience was SO much better.   I couldn't plan a hospital birth with an OB and most CNMs because I want the prenatal care I get from a hb mw.  Which is basically: I don't want any tests and I don't want to fight about it, treat me with respect and discuss things with me.  I just had a TERRIBLE, like I could not explain how terrible, experience with an OB who actually works with mws.  I just simply can not employ that kind of medical professional.  I don't know what I am gonna do this time. But absolutely would I have a hb again if I could do it myself (if I don't have PIH again) or find a mw to take me.   

post #15 of 41

Yes! I had a hb with both of my DD's. My labor with DD1 was perfect and very textbook but she ended up with shoulder dystocia and she was only 8lbs. Once my MW got her out she was fine and had no problems. So no transfer. I knew that my midwife handled the sd perfectly and it wouldn't have gone any better in a hospital. I was very nervous of having another hb and did go through the what if's of having another shoulder dystocia. But I knew that I wanted another hb. My labor with DD2 was only 2 and 1/2 hours and I pushed her out in 3 contractions. No shoulder dystocia!

1

post #16 of 41

So I met with my midwife today, and we talked a lot about Meadow's birth and the circumstances surrounding the transfer. I feel so much better about planning a HB now! She knows me and my family so well, and she has great intuition. I really believe she has our safety as her highest priority, and that is a huge relief.  And like a PP said, the care of a hb midwife is so amazing, I couldn't imagine going to a doctor. When I went to my GP for a pregnancy test, she tried to argue with me about when my period was due! I was like, I think I know when I'm fertile and which day I'm on, but she couldn't wrap her mind around the fact that not all women have 28 day cycles and ovulate on day 14 eyesroll.gif  I would much rather see a practitioner who knows me and will listen to me.

post #17 of 41

I had a homebirth and almost died of a Strep A infection. They took my uterus to save my life. If I could have more children I would do it at home unassisted. 

post #18 of 41

We transferred for exhaustion and no progression (after 60 hours of labor I was still only 3 centimeters). I will do a homebirth for the second.

post #19 of 41

With my last home birth I was in agonizing pain and after DD was born I started to hemhorrage. It was such a scary feeling, I felt like I started to slip out of reality. Thankfully I didn't have to transfer. I am planning another home birth,I just thought of all the things I did not want and realized I couldn't have a hospital birth

post #20 of 41

 

I would HB again, but I'm not sure DH would. I had severe PPH, ambulance transfer, and transfusion. DH says he thought he was losing me, and can't go through it again. Right now that is looking like no more kids for us, but maybe time will heal his emotional scars.
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