Flying with a baby? Does he need his own seat? Does he need to be in his car seat and strapped in?

[MamitaM]

I'm thinking of visiting friends this Summer with my little man, but money is tight. So do I need to pay for an extra seat for him? I thought I'd just wear him and have him sit on my lap during the flight. 

[Knitting Mama]

We flew with Cecilia at 5-ish months and did not buy an extra seat. We gate checked her carseat and got it when we landed. During the flight I nursed her during takeoff and landing, and she slept for much of the flight and happily played for the rest. She loves people, so people-watching on the plane was fascinating for her, as was looking out the window.

[mimi_mommy]

In Canada babes can fly for free up to 2 years of age, and most airlines are so accomondating! Westjet allows you to bring as much liquid as you need through security, when flying with a baby! They also allow you to bring both your carseat and stroller through to the gate, at which point then load it below and have ready when you disembark from the plane. Most Canadian airlines will also give your partner a buddy pass to help you through security if you request it, at no extra cost, which can be such a huge help since motherhood requires that you have six hands. I have flown with Westjet six times with my babe and when I go through the baggage check the attendants have been good for blocking off the middle seat you there isn't three people plus a babe jammed together. And finally, while most airlines wont say it, you can nurse for landing and take off, even though when you board they will tell you you have to hold baby on your lap for landing and take-off!!

If baby is young then get a window seat so you can nurse more comfortable and don't have to worry about heads getting bump by the snack cart.

The white noise and constant vibration of the plane is normally pretty good for putting babies to sleep, try and book your flight to depart at the same time that nap-time starts!!!

[Knitting Mama]

You can fly free in the States too, same rules. And gate check is the same thing as what you describe with the carseat and stroller. However, many people buy an extra seat for their children for safety reasons.

[bananabee]

Originally Posted by Cecilia's Mama 

We flew with Cecilia at 5-ish months and did not buy an extra seat. We gate checked her carseat and got it when we landed. During the flight I nursed her during takeoff and landing, and she slept for much of the flight and happily played for the rest. She loves people, so people-watching on the plane was fascinating for her, as was looking out the window.

The above was exactly my experience with my 6 1/2 DD a couple weeks ago when we flew. Kids under 2 yrs old fly free and sit in your lap. We only had a few seconds of tears once or twice. The flight attendants bantered over who got to hold her when I was in the bathroom, and we got extra juice. Everyone along the way was very helpful, and we even made a couple friends. I didn't bother to bring a car seat as my folks had borrowed one for us to use. I did see something that some people were boarding the plane with that looked like a car seat and fit the shape of the plane seats that must have been for toddlers.

[Momsteader]

You don't need to buy a seat. If you have a stroller/infant seat combo, bring it along and gate check it. That way, you can see if there is an empty seat next to you and you might be able to use it for the seat if you wish.

[dex_millie]

No you do not need to pay for an extra carseat. I have two children and have flown too much to count from the time they was 2 months to Caribbean Islands (7-9 hour flights) and I do not buy an extra seat, once they are under 2 it is free.

[tzs]

to add to all this, i've found that at check-in, attendants will make an extra effort to block a (free) seat for babe and carseat if the flight is not full. you'll even get a boarding pass for that seat. so bring a seat with plans to check at the gate and if you get lucky you'll be able to use it in the plane.

(i've heard it's worth it to buy a carseat travel bag. baggage handlers are notorious for manhandling them and they can come back to you way worse for the wear.)

and yeah, the white noise is amazing!

[Terrilein]

I had a mixed experience the one time I flew from Europe to the US with my then 1 year old baby. The Germany->US flight was a nightmare. My dd cried the whole time and the flight attendants avoided me/us like the plague although I was flying alone with my dd. They doted on another child on the plane that was sitting "properly" between the parents in a car seat and doped up on I don't know what. I overheard how they had booked the wrong meal for their child and guess what? They got my child's meal, and they tried passing off an adult meal as a toddler meal. I was furious. Good thing I was still nursing her and brought my own snacks just in case. I had booked a seat for her thinking we'd need the extra space - we did - but I didn't bring her car seat because I couldn't handle all that luggage. The flight back on the same airline was completely different which is why I'm not mentioning the carrier's name. We had a flight atttendant who catered to dd's every whim which wasn't hard since she slept most of the way home. On both flights I was very happy to have the extra space to "lounge" while nursing and have a little play space for dd.

So, I'd say if you're on a short flight, do the lap thing, but keep the risk of bad turbulance in mind. On a long flight, I'd book an extra seat because you will want to spread out more and make you and your child more comfortable with or without a carseat.

[Peony]

We buy seats for our babies. While a carseat isn't always going to help if the plane falls out of the sky, runway/taxing accidents happen as well as turbulence. We had one trip last summer with severe turbulence on two different flights. I am talking about things crashing, people screaming, plane dropping rapidly multiple times, it was bad. I've been on some rough flights over the mountains and this one took the cake. The flight previously that had been rough was due to severe thunderstorms and sudden tornados. Thank goodness I had a seat for baby DS because there was no way I could of held onto him. My oldest child smacked her head against the window hard  as it was 

[MamitaM]

That sounds scary! I'm hoping nothing like that happens when I fly.

Terrilien did you complain to the company about that flight? I think I would have. They should have treated you the same as the other family and maybe offered you a little more help since you were on your own.

[hakeber]

The one time I bothered to book a seat for my baby (US Air, 2005) the attendant decided my FAA approved car seat wasn't appropriate for that plane and took it away with the promise of bringing it back after take off since I explained it was the only position my little boy could sleep in.  She was really rude about my nursing him, too.

Coincidentally I was also travelling alone with him.  I know this sounds paranoid, but I think there is a HUGE stigmatism against single (or even apparently single) moms travelling with their kids.  I have found attendants to be super helpful and accomodating when I travel with my husband, And in Latin America they will do everythig they can to make you and baby comfortable including giving bulkhead seats for free (from the US they now charge 90$ for a bulkhead seat!) and bringing you extra water, snacks, blankets from first class, etc to make you and baby comfortable.  They also sneak you on without making any boarding announcements, before the first class or business even get to board. 

In the states, especially on domestic flights they seem to all but spit on you if you dare to travel alone with your kids.

I don't buy seats for my kids, but I do nurse them to sleep while the plane is boarding, then strap them into my front carrier and wear my seat belt.  During the flight I usually let them play at my feet or am walking the aisles.

[Terrilein]

I didn't have time to make any complaints, and in the end I figured it was just one bad batch of attendants since the flight back was fine. In hindsight I should have considering how accomodating the airline was for this couple while I was straining under the weight of all our luggage and toddler in sling. I saw a someone from the airline actually helping them carry their stuff to the gate while she carried the baby and he carried the car seat. I was doing the work of three adults. At the moment I was peeved, but thought it must have been my fault for not asking for help when we checked in. I wonder now why I wasn't asked if I could handle everything (2 carry ons and a toddler + our suitcase at our layover point) alone. But I did manage to do some fine sling advertisement. Lots of people were really impressed.

Originally Posted by MamitaM 

That sounds scary! I'm hoping nothing like that happens when I fly.

Terrilien did you complain to the company about that flight? I think I would have. They should have treated you the same as the other family and maybe offered you a little more help since you were on your own.

OT: And yeah I totally think single parents or seemingly single parents often get inferior treatment. I don't quite understand why though (and yes, I've done the single mom thing and am solo-parenting at the moment since DP is almost always away on business). I think a lot of people, especially our government in Germany, think single parents are at fault for their situation, and deserve an extra kick in the side because they are just trying to leech wherever they can. Also, I think there are plenty of people out there who think single parents are husband/wife snatchers, which is quite ridiculous. I think the last thing a single parent needs are more complications. And more often than not, it's not a case of the single parent snatching someone's partner, but rather that partner trying to have some fun at the single parent's expense thinking that single parent may be desparate for some attention. Kind of icky, but I've really seen it.

Edited by Terrilein - 1/11/11 at 12:03am

[sapphire_chan]

Originally Posted by Terrilein 

I didn't have time to make any complaints, and in the end I figured it was just one bad batch of attendants since the flight back was fine. In hindsight I should have considering how accomodating the airline was for this couple while I was straining under the weight of all our luggage and toddler in sling. I saw a someone from the airline actually helping them carry their stuff to the gate while she carried the baby and he carried the car seat. I was doing the work of three adults. At the moment I was peeved, but thought it must have been my fault for not asking for help when we checked in. I wonder now why I wasn't asked if I could handle everything (2 carry ons and a toddler + our suitcase at our layover point) alone. But I did manage to do some fine sling advertisement. Lots of people were really impressed.

Originally Posted by MamitaM 

That sounds scary! I'm hoping nothing like that happens when I fly.

Terrilien did you complain to the company about that flight? I think I would have. They should have treated you the same as the other family and maybe offered you a little more help since you were on your own.

OT: And yeah I totally think single parents or seemingly single parents often get inferior treatment. I don't quite understand why though (and yes, I've done the single mom thing and am solo-parenting at the moment since DP is almost always away on business). I think a lot of people, especially our government in Germany, think single parents are at fault for their situation, and deserve an extra kick in the side because they are just trying to leech wherever they can. Also, I think there are plenty of people out there who think single parents are husband/wife snatchers, which is quite ridiculous. I think the last thing a single parent needs are more complications. And more often than not, it's not a case of the single parent snatching someone's partner, but rather that partner trying to have some fun at the single parent's expense thinking that single parent may be desparate for some attention. Kind of icky, but I've really seen it.

Even if someone has that sort of idiotic attitude about single parents, why on earth would they assume a woman traveling alone with a baby is a single parent?

Terrilen, was the father in the spoiled family good looking? Maybe the attendants were just sexist? The story reminds me of a comic strip I read from the 80's where the man and woman take a flight and the attendent takes the man's HUGE garment bag and stows it in a closet, and then tells the woman she'll need to check her purse.
 

[TCMoulton]

Why would you assume that because a child was sitting quietly that they were all doped up by the parents - my girls both seemed to love planes and flying from a very young age (we started flying I believe when they were each 6 months old) and never cried or fussed during flights (I was very very grateful for this, believe me!)
 

OP - we never purchased a seat for our kids until they were 2 and it worked out well for us - our flights were only 3 hours at the most but it wasn't hard to keep them amused with a few new toys, favorite snacks, and when all else was considered boring the in-flight magazine! Have a wonderful trip!
 

Originally Posted by Terrilein 

 My dd cried the whole time and the flight attendants avoided me/us like the plague although I was flying alone with my dd. They doted on another child on the plane that was sitting "properly" between the parents in a car seat and doped up on I don't know what.  

[frisbar]

If you can possibly afford it, buying a seat for your child is really the safest/best option.  While I don't exactly look to the AAP as an authority on most things, I do think they have a opint about child restraints on planes.  But if you can't afford the extra seat and would otherwise drive, you should definitely fly and hold the baby - that's safer every day of the week.

Hope you have a great trip!

http://aappolicy.aappublications.org/cgi/content/full/pediatrics;108/5/1218

[Terrilein]

I know it seems like an assumption, but I did see them giving measuring out a red liquid substance to their child before the flight started. Could have been cough syrup for all I know. But that child didn't make a single peep during the entire flight. I assumed he was given a sedative.
 

Originally Posted by TCMoulton 

Why would you assume that because a child was sitting quietly that they were all doped up by the parents - my girls both seemed to love planes and flying from a very young age (we started flying I believe when they were each 6 months old) and never cried or fussed during flights (I was very very grateful for this, believe me!)

Not sure why people assume that mothers travelling with children but without a man by their side must be single. It's probably just a quick and easy conclusion most people draw. As for the other couple with the baby, I can't remember at all what the father looked like. I really just think they got help because they asked for it, and then were doted on in the plane because they had the "good" baby and I had the "cry baby".

Originally Posted by sapphire_chan 

Even if someone has that sort of idiotic attitude about single parents, why on earth would they assume a woman traveling alone with a baby is a single parent?

Terrilen, was the father in the spoiled family good looking? Maybe the attendants were just sexist? The story reminds me of a comic strip I read from the 80's where the man and woman take a flight and the attendent takes the man's HUGE garment bag and stows it in a closet, and then tells the woman she'll need to check her purse.
 

Edited by Terrilein - 1/11/11 at 1:06pm