13 months and no AF...will stopping pumping help?

[Ruby2]

Dd will be 13 months this week and I haven't gotten my period back yet...I am a little anxious about this for a few reasons...

1 - I have NO sex drive. None. Hoping AF will help?!?! Poor dh...

2 - We'd like to begin TTC #2 by May...I'd like to have a few normal cycles first.

I'm wondering dropping my once a day pumping session could help bring it back? Anyone been in a similar situation?

I want to nurse dd for as long as possible, and she is very agreeable to that at the moment... I'm gone for about 6.5 hours every week day and she nurses 2 times when I get home, plus 3 or 4 times in the night (material for a different post...) and in the morning. I have a pretty big freezer stash, but I'm sooooo nervous to stop pumping. She barely drinks 3oz of EBM while I'm gone and likes solids, and I've read all of the threads that reassure me my supply probably won't be affected, but...I'm still hesitating.

Any advice is welcome!

[kismetbaby]

Hi mama. Don't really have any answers, but just wanted to tell you that I logged on to start a thread about having NO libido while Bfing.  So I feel you.  My DS is 15m and I still have not had a return of my cycles or a return of my libido.  I'm starting to get anxious about this.  I too want to start TTC this summer, but I want to keep BFing my babe too.

From what I can tell, every woman is different. There is quite a spectrum from women who get their cycles back at 3 m PP while EBFing to women who have to totally wean to get them back. So for you, dropping the pumping might very well be what you need.  They say a sudden change is more likely to kick-start your cycles again than a gradual one. I'd like to nightwean and see if that does it for me, but I'm not quite ready to take that plunge yet. . .I understand your hesitation, but I do think that your supply will be just fine if you are only dropping one pump/nurse session.

Sorry I don't have more advice for you, but just wanted to chime in to commiserate.

[Quinalla]

AF returned for me just before 13 months and I think because DD slept through the night once then nearly through the next night (at that time she was usually waking 3 times and eating at all 3 times, now she is down to 1-2 times). For me, skipping a session of pumping or even skipping a day of pumping (I did the former many times, the latter 2 times) was not enough to bring AF back, but it could be for you. I would try it if I were you and see what happens, if you feel your supply is being affected too much, you can always start pumping again and your body will start producing more once you signal for it. I finally stopped pumping two weeks ago and no complaints from my DD for her night and morning sessions or on the weekends, I did do it gradually over two weeks, going down from 2 pumping sessions to 1 and moving that session later and later in the day, but that was just for my comfort and to avoid any issues.

[Ruby2]

Thanks for the advice ladies! I started thinking about this seriously on Monday and just pumped for half the length of time that I normally do, but then read your advice, kismetbaby, about how a sudden change can help. I didn't pump at all today or yesterday and it's not as uncomfortable as I thought it would be. If dd suddenly slept through the night I would probably pass out from shock... I think she woke up every 45 minutes last night and nursed every. single. time.

I REALLY hope that my libido recovers soon...it's putting a lot of stress on my marriage. :-(

[dayiscoming2006]

I'd limit it to one (or none)nursing session during the night. My kids at like 6 months old were only eating once at night. I wouldn't nurse on demand at night. That'd certainly change things. 

There are other ways to comfort your baby. It'll be tough at first cuz you got your baby used to nursing back to sleep, but they figure it out. I think it only takes me a couple night to develop a new habit for my babies. 

I got my period back 15 months PP with DS2. I was still nursing him up til 17 and a half months. But, I nursed him 3-4 times a day, then twice for like a week and then he was bored and didn't care about it anymore.

[Ruby2]

Oh wow, I know I could/should cut down on the night nursing...I think it really comes down to doing what's easy in the moment. I have high goals to cut down almost every night, but never follow through. Dd has this horrible not-really-awake wail that she does 3 or 4 times a night and nursing calms her down quickly so she goes back to sleep...more material for a different post! :-)

[dayiscoming2006]

My 2 year old still does that wail I think you are talking about some nights but he calms himself down usually and occasionally he just needs a diaper change. 

I know it's tough cuz you have your go to thing with nursing but if you can give her a pat or cuddle and just make sure she is dry and let her know it's all alright, then possibly exit the room (unless you cosleep?), I think that would be good. It's a good skill for a kiddo to learn - to calm themselves down and sleep without too much help. I've found that the wail you described goes away within a few minutes most times after they get used to not getting their milk maker every time. They just naturally will calm down and go back to sleep most of the time. I only have 2 kids so I'm of course basing it on just my experience, but that's my best recommendation for you. HTH