What do you do when the crying escalates?

[mrs.t]

My 9 mo DS has always been high needs. He is very independent and also very sensitive. Lately, if he cries for some reason (which doesn't happen too often) he gets into hysterics rather quickly and it's difficult to snap him out of it. As soon as he starts crying I pick him up, hug him, talk in a soothing voice, rub his back, but nothing seems to comfort him. A good example of this was the other day, when he was nursing and he bit me. I pulled away and said "No!" firmly, and he started to cry. After a few seconds it was all out hysterics and there was little I could do to soothe him. I feel really terrible when something like this happens, and I don't know what to do. I have never left him to CIO, and I try to be a very gentle parent. I know there is a window of a few seconds where if he doesn't calm down he will fall apart. How do I handle this? It's never related to any kind of pain, it will mostly be when he doesn't get his way (like if I have to take something dangerous out of his reach) or if he can't do something. I'm really getting bothered by this because I feel like a terrible mom.

[rachelsmama]

It doesn't sound like you're a bad mom. Sometimes kids scream and get hysterical. DS went through a phase where he would get hysterical about something, and if I tried to hold him and soothe him it would just make him even more hysterical, and through trial and error, the best way I could figure out to deal with it was to just give him some space (he would usually crawl under the table), stay where he could see me, and when he was ready he would come to me and I would nurse him. Fortunately that phase didn't last too long.