School, childcare, and younger sibling...how exactly does this work?

[nina_yyc]

DD is in kindy next September and DS will be 20 months.  Currently I work Fri/Sat/Sun/Mon and DH works weekdays.  They are in a fantastic day home on my way to work on Mon & Fri.  To be honest this school thing sounds like a logistical nightmare...would like some input on some options.  WWYD?

1. Put DD in school close to home and keep DS in day home.  Switch hours to Mon-Fri, and try to get full time at work (they said I could have f/t whenever I want as long as there is enough work, and that seems likely.)  The shift is 7a.m. to 3:30p.m., so I would drop DS off at 6:30 a.m. and pick him up at 4:00, then retrieve DD from after-school care at 4:30 or so.  DH walks her to school in a.m.  My extra hours cover the extra childcare, and we get family weekends.  However DS goes from 2 days a week in the day home to 5 days a week :(.
2. Put DD in school close to home, keep DS in day home, but keep part time hours.  See DD only after school and work, never get a day at home with her :(, hope my marriage can weather another year of limited couple time, but keep DS out of full time care.  Also will probably waste money on paying for before and after care for DD when she only requires it twice a week.  (I don't think they do part time.)
3. Put DD in school close to day home (if possible...the school will only take out of district kids if there's room.)  Work full time, but only have one stop each way.  ETA: Day home provider does not provide transport, though the school is within walking distance.  Try to work with DD's classmates to arrange transport.

Couple of things are out:  non-public school (can't afford it,) nanny (can't afford it,) homeschooling (super extraverted child,) and child care for both kids close to home (unavailable.)

Edited by nina_yyc - 1/14/11 at 4:00pm

[laurabfig]

After reading your post, I think maybe you could try option #3- seems like it would give you the most time with your kids, if that is what you are wanting.  Or maybe full time during the weekdays.  I do think it would be hard to never have a day at home with your daughter.  I tried to imagine this myself and it was hard to do....

[laurabfig]

just thought of something else- will your son's day home provider take your daughter for some after school hours if the school is near her house?  that might be better than after care at the school...

[MelW]

I would lean towards #2, mostly because it's similar to what we do. My oldest is in full-day kindergarten right now, and youngest in daycare 3x/week. We use our in-home daycare provider for after school care, too, so have the advantage of just one pick-up. Plus we only pay for the days that we use, because that's the way it works around here.

Honestly, if your kindergarten is anything like ours, you'll have *lots* of pro-d days, other random non-instructional days that will be days at home with the oldest. And if you feel like it, you could pull the oldest out occasionally for a day at home with you- plus all of the cool stuff (museums, etc.) are less busy on school days :)  My daughter has a few classmates who do this quite often.

We're taking it one year at a time with childcare and work plans, too. I've had a pretty flexible schedule since my daughter started kindy, but am going back to four evenings a week. I've done it before, and it was good with a toddler/preschooler to be at home in the mornings, but is really going to suck on the days where I basically won't see my oldest from school drop-off until the next morning :(

[nina_yyc]

Originally Posted by laurabfig 

After reading your post, I think maybe you could try option #3- seems like it would give you the most time with your kids, if that is what you are wanting.  Or maybe full time during the weekdays.  I do think it would be hard to never have a day at home with your daughter.  I tried to imagine this myself and it was hard to do....

Originally Posted by laurabfig 

just thought of something else- will your son's day home provider take your daughter for some after school hours if the school is near her house?  that might be better than after care at the school...

Yes - our day home mama has said she can take them full time if required.  I did forget to mention when I originally posted though that there is a transportation hiccup with this option - DCP does not transport so DD would need to be picked up each day.  (I think she can probably walk to school with DCP's kids who are in elementary.)

For some reason I am really reluctant to coordinate transport...guess I don't like the thought of asking for favors   Maybe I need to get past that.  This year I was going to coordinate preschool transport with another mom at the day home but then came up with my Fri-Mon schedule so I could take her to preschool one block from home Tue & Thur.

Actually #1 and #3 would be pretty much the same for time with kids.  #2 would give me more time with DS and less with DD.

Arghhhhhh.

Originally Posted by MelW 
We're taking it one year at a time with childcare and work plans, too.

Yeah.  I don't know how to plan so far in advance when it is so hard to know what will work for your family.  Although it is for this reason that I am kinda stuck now...had I put my kids on a waiting list at birth or before, I would have them well set up for Kindergarten care right close to home!

We might go with an option that is most convenient/least costly for kindergarten, then re-evaluate in grade one.  The before/after care costs come way down when you take out that half day.

We've been looking at alternative public school programs that provide bussing.  The programs are in more suburban areas so day homes might be more available.

I am so overwhelmed right now.  Educational philosophy? Convenience? Cost? Providing the kids with fewest possible transitions in childcare?  I am beginning to make snap judgments about schools based on whether their before/after care programs actually pick up the phone and/or return calls :lol  To complicate things further our designated public school does not find out if they're funded for full-day kindy until April and does not hold the open house until May.  If I apply to an out-of-bounds public school it needs to be done probably by February to stand a chance of getting into the lottery.  Alternative programs need to be applied to by March 15.

End rant.

[liberal_chick]

For me, option 3 would be the right choice.  I would be sad if I was only able to see my ds1 for such limited times (and our kindy has only had 1 PD day this year so far, and no early releases, so aside from the normal breaks for Thanksgiving/Christmas/Labor Day/etc, they've been in school).  And my marriage thrives on putting in the time on it, so hardly seeing my dh would be a deal breaker for me as well.