Moving during pregnancy

[mija y mijo]

There is a possibility that DH will be getting a new job that will require us to move halfway across the country in the next couple of months...  I'm currently 20 weeks pregnant and trying not to freak out, but at the same time prepare myself for what lies ahead.  The options would be to move when I'm 30 weeks pregnant or wait until just after the baby is born.  It seems to make the most sense to move while I'm pregnant.  I can't imagine the stress of moving with a newborn.  But then again, I was planning for a homebirth here and don't know if that will workout in our new city on such short notice (it's not exactly a hb friendly area from what I've read).  And the idea of trying to find another care provider near the end of my pregnancy is a little unnerving.  While I would be sad that the homebirth I've always wanted would be up in the air, I REALLY don't want to move with a newborn...  being sleep deprived and nursing around the clock.  I think I'd seriously lose my mind.

Has anyone been in a similar situation?  How did end up working out?  Any advice or suggestions to ease my anxiety over this would be much appreciated. 

[sonshine_rae]

((((((((((hugs))))))))))

I don't really have any advice.. but some of the same concerns we are possibly going to be moving in the next month or two (I'm 21 weeks right now) and it's kind of scary.  Granted we'll probably still be in the same town, so it won't mess with my home birth (might even help that even, as it could be a better layout in the house for home birth).

But it's hard to decide whether it'll be easier to move while pregnant or wait till after baby comes.. I already have 3 kids to chase.. and my newborn times have always been crazy, so a big 'yeah that' as to when should we move.....

I know some on here.. might consider a UC if they had to move late pregnancy.. away from their midwife, I probably would look into any local midwifes and consider UC if necessary as I'm going to try my hardest to stay outta the hospitals for birth.  But I've had two natural hospital births, and 1 natural home birth.. so I'm fairly confident in my ability to give birth.

[Italiamom]

I moved with a 1.5 month old, and it was a nightmare.  Just.  Awful.

However, if I had to choose between the horrors of packing and moving with a newborn or not having the amazing, lovely, non-hospital birth that I did, well, I would still choose the amazing birth experience+nightmare move over an easier move+nightmare birth experience.  The move was really hard, packing was exhausting, moving day was deeply stressful, and unpacking took SO much longer.  But I'd do it that way again if I knew that's what needed to be done to guarantee the birth that I was fortunate enough to have.

It's a rock and a hard place position mama, I'm very sorry for you!!

[amaayeh]

I might be in a similar situation except for the fact that I won't have a choice when we move.  If it were me, I would start researching right now and find every possible resource for a homebirth at this new location.  You would be surprised at what you can find sometimes and the tribal areas have helped me locate various resources.  I know plenty of women who have changed health care providers after 30 weeks and been fine.  Do the research now, though, and interview if necessary now.  If it were me, there is no way I would take away that special newborn time with the stress of packing and moving.  I recently moved across the country and it was horrible...and my kids are a bit older.  Now I may have to move back with a one month old and needless to say, I'm completely and totally stressed out about it.  I just want that special time to sit in the rocking chair and nurse my babe for hours.  That's me, though.  :)

[mija y mijo]

Quote:

Originally Posted by amaayeh 

I might be in a similar situation except for the fact that I won't have a choice when we move.  If it were me, I would start researching right now and find every possible resource for a homebirth at this new location.  You would be surprised at what you can find sometimes and the tribal areas have helped me locate various resources.  I know plenty of women who have changed health care providers after 30 weeks and been fine.  Do the research now, though, and interview if necessary now.  If it were me, there is no way I would take away that special newborn time with the stress of packing and moving.  I recently moved across the country and it was horrible...and my kids are a bit older.  Now I may have to move back with a one month old and needless to say, I'm completely and totally stressed out about it.  I just want that special time to sit in the rocking chair and nurse my babe for hours.  That's me, though.  :)

This rings so true for me.  The more I think about it, moving while pregnant seems the best way to go.  I've been poking around the tribal area...  It looks like there are a few CNMs that will attend a homebirth, I suppose it would just be a question of whether or not they are available to take me on as a client (CPMs are illegal).  I'm totally not comfortable doing a UC, so that option is out.  My last birth was as nice as a hospital birth with an OB could be, so I know it's possible to have a good experience if we have to go that route (I'd choose a midwife practice this time, possibly hiring a doula).  And it looks like there are some good recommendations if that's our only option in the end. 

Now, we just have to sit here in limbo for the next couple of weeks to find out if this is a sure thing. 

[staryla]

I moved from California to Oklahoma at 33 weeks with my son.  While it wasn't fun it was far preferable to trying to do all that with a newborn.  Just the drive alone would have been unbearable with stopping to feed and change and the baby crying...

My situation was different because I was moving from a HORRIBLE obstetrician (but the only one in a 90 mile radius) to a group of hospital practicing midwives.  So I was very glad to be moving in that respect.

Maybe you could send the CNM's in the area you are moving to an email to explain your situation and that you may be moving, but aren't sure.  Ask them if they accept patients at that stage and then if you get some good responses you could follow up with phone calls and more questions.  Once we knew we were moving I contacted the midwives in the new area and actually flew in to have a meet and greet with them.  It really reassured me and they had no problem jumping into the last few weeks of pregnancy with me. 

[PAgreenmama]

we moved from MN to PA when dd was 5 weeks old and it honestly wasn't bad.  i did as much packing as i could before she was born ( i wouldn't recommend doing much in the first several weeks after the baby arrives... i recovered just find from her birth until 2 weeks after when i moved a box and my pelvic floor gave out or something... the next few weeks were horrible with a hemorrhoid and the feeling that my uterus was falling out... ugh).  we hired a moving company to get our stuff and my mother and mil flew out to help us drive both our cars.  i thought the drive would take forever with a newborn but she magically slept the entire time (she was never a good daytime sleeper so it really was magical).  we stopped when she woke to stretch, nurse and eat and the drive honestly didn't take any longer than it used to take dh and i alone!  

we did move back to my hometown so we had the help of my parents and we actually just moved in with my mom for the first few months so that was much easier than moving to a brand new town and having to set up a new home immediately.  if i were in your shoes, i'd look into birthing options in the new area since it would obviously be easier to move before baby but if it doesn't look as good as the hb you have set up now, i'd stay for the birth you want and move with a nb.  it's doable!  

good luck!

[donutmolly]

Ugh!  I'm also facing a move either very close to my EDD or with a newborn.  I'm very nervous about it especially because we're still in the "waiting to know" phase.

I've moved during pregnancy before, and switching care providers isn't ideal, but if you can find a good homebirth situation, I'd much rather move during pregnancy than with a baby!  FWIW, my mw told me that she sees lots of moves during pregnancy, it often seems to be a time of big changes for some reason. 

[Mamatoabunch]

I loved at 32 weeks w/ my third, 20 weeks w/ my fourth. I prefer to move pregnant than w/ a newborn. We are facing a move, of our choice, and I pray it comes together before I have the baby. All of ours were born at home, I found a midwife easily, but I know that isn't always the case.

[Kristynwy]

I am in a similar situation. My husband is switching jobs and we are moving to a new town on the other side of the mountain range near us, about 100 miles.

I choose to stay in town and give birth, I have a great Doula and know what I have here, going to a new town I would know no one and not be able to have my Doula. I have no family that live in the state either. Plus my 6 year old daughter is Autistic and in a special classroom and I want to make the transition as smooth as possible for her, so we are letting her finish out the school year that ends in May.

Baby is due May 28th and we are planning on moving in July. My husband has 3 friends that want to help him and his parents are going to help as well. So I have 3-4 months to pack everything... Dh has agreed he will take care of all the moving part and I will be exclusively taking care of the baby. My inlaws will help me look after my 6 year old.

While it is ideal to move while pregnant, just not something we can't do in our circumstances. My husbands new company is being really nice and to us and is going to pay our relocation costs.

I think moving with a baby can be done, if the mom and baby are respected and if you have lots of helpers and planning it can work. Just depends on how many are willing to help your husband so you can be with the baby.

The only thing that would change our circumstances is I am supposed to be getting some inheritance funds soon that was left to me, I have no idea what the amount is but if it is sizable. We could rent a place over in the other town, and move the majority of our stuff much earlier and keep just the basics like our bed here have the baby and then when read in July make the move with a lot less of a hassle.  

[baby3in2011]

i've moved twice while pregnant, the first time i was 6 months pg with ds and the 2nd time i was 8 weeks in my current pregnancy. we also moved when my dd was a year old. granted we didn't move across the country, the first 2 moves were across town and the last move was only about 50 miles away for dh's new job. so i haven't moved with a newborn, but i could only imagine how hard that would be. especially if you are moving across states and might not know anyone to help you unpack. our method was, i would watch the kids and a group of the guys would load/unload the truck. as far as packing goes, i packed the majority of our stuff while dh was at work, we bought the cheap grey bins from wal-mart that way everything stacked up easily and didnt get crushed (granted you have to spend the money on them, but we thought they were well worth it and we've used them for all our moves). i would try to pack at least 2 bins a day and i labeled them by room so they can go straight to that room when you move and you dont have to sort them out, just unpack them as you have time/energy to. we moved 6 months ago and we aren't unpacked completely yet

[mija y mijo]

DH was supposed to go next week and work everything out, but now we have to wait until the 2nd week of February!!!  Our lease here ends March 30.  I'm freaking out.  I NEED to know if we're going or staying.  I feel like everything is up in the air right now and I'm trying not to stress out.  I guess I'll have a month to find an apartment and a new midwife if we end up moving.  I have an appointment with an OB today, so that I can have records that will transfer if I end up having to have a hospital birth.  And I'm meeting with my midwife tonight, so I'll let her know what's going on.  I'm wondering if I should just not make anymore appointments with her until we have a definite answer?  I've been looking at apartments online to get an idea of where we may like to live, but it's really overwhelming.  This uncertainty is so stressful!  

[bonjourmama]

So,

Havent gotten the chance to read the other responses yet, but IME moving after baby is here is much harder. Before, while you may be tired and exhausted, it is nice to have something to do while waiting for your little one. The hardest part for me was finding a midwife at 35 weeks pg. No one wanted me and I ended up delivering with my last choice. Everything worked out, but I would have liked it differently. 

Now, we have moved again and I am overwhelmed. SO MUCH STUFF and a baby that doesn't like to be set down (rightfully so).

It was much easier moving before. Plus, it got all of my nesting instincts taken care of!

[bonjourmama]

Oh, so sorry about the stressful uncertainty. It so is. I hope everything works out for you guys.

[mija y mijo]

Originally Posted by bonjourmama 

Oh, so sorry about the stressful uncertainty. It so is. I hope everything works out for you guys.

Thank you!  It helps to know that other mamas have gone through this and it all worked out.

[Mamato3wild ponnie]

I understand 100%, we are 95% sure that we are moving to Europe in the next month. I am 29 weeks pregnant and everything is sooo up in the air. We are in Europe right now and still need to get back home to Mexico in the next few weeks....then get back to europe before my flying time runs out. I havent found a provider in EU yet, and that is nerve racking. I'm really starting to wonder about a UC. Lotus Birth...would be easiest for me if I go unassisted birth. But then to register the babies birth in another country when it's a unassisted birth may be to much!

I really want to start getting everything ready for the baby. But all the baby stuff is is in MX and were here. I have had to let go and take it all one day at a time. I have NOTHING ready for the baby and that is starting to bother me. I know that can be done in a short amount of time. BUT!!!!! I'm ready to do that now!

anywho....you are not alone. hugsssss mama

[Butterfly Ball]

During my last pregnancy we moved twice out of state with my husband's work!! It was not nearly as stressful as I had imagined it to be! We have our house up for sale now and hopefully will be able to move before this little one comes along! (only 5.5 weeks preg. right now!) The thought of moving with my toddler freaks me out a bit though!

Moving while pregnant just takes a lot of planning, but really it's not too hard! You have 2 older kids... are they in school or at home with you? (My kids (13, 10, 7, 13 months) are homeschooled so with me all day!) If they are at school take advantage of that time to try and pack up things that you can live without for the next couple of months. You'd be surprised when you really stop to think about it, how little we actually need or use of our stuff on a daily or weekly basis! So pack up the non-essentials and get those out of the way now while you still have a bit of energy! That will leave a lot less to deal with when the time comes for the actual move! Oh! And be sure to label your boxes well, it makes things much easier to place where they belong and unpack!

Good luck!