I would love to print out this states rules on the birth cert/social for UC. May I ask where you found that stuff? You don't live in NY by any chance do you? lol.
Love it OrangeMoon! I don't have anything really, but I am constantly making mental lists. Your list looks really good and sounds like the kind of things we'll have on hand too. In place of the stones/beads I am going to print out some verses/scripture/pictures to put in my birthing space (or at least near the pool where I believe I'll at least labor for a while) for inspiration/protection.
I'm also putting together a one page sheet for hubby to remember in labor in case he gets flustered or in case I'm more comfortable laboring/birthing alone so he'll have productive things to do for me 
I think he'll really appreciate that too, he is a 'list' person. It would also be hints for myself as well, tips like a spoonful of honey helping to bring energy back up, or a cup of salty broth helping after labor to perk mama up if she's lost blood. Little suggestions for support, stuff like that.
I also feel so much better about the whole birth certificate process. For me, I have a "proof" of pregnancy because I had some prenatal care before letting my midwife go. I also made copies of the statues for my state dealing with how to register a birth with no attendant and got the facts. I know exactly what we need now. For example, the vital statistics lady told me the health dept doctor would "have to look the baby over" when we brought him in. NOT TRUE! According to the statutes in my state one of the options is "presenting" the baby with the parents (basically, bringing the babe with you to show there is indeed a baby and no one's running a scam) but no one is authorized to touch, examine, otherwise "look over" the baby. I think having info is important because if I didn't know, I might get scared/flustered. Also, she told me someone other than myself and my husband HAD to WITNESS the actual birth and sign a statement saying so. NOT TRUE. I need two statements of anyone who "knew of the circumstances of my birth" either prior to, or immediately after birth. So, my mom and friend will just do that even if they're not here, easy peasy. Unfortunately, I am going to have to jump through those hoops because the people at vital statistics are absolutely clueless to what to do for planned UC (as evidenced by my conversation with the woman). So, it will take me bringing copies of the actual statutes and so on as to not get any guff. I'm okay with that though, I expect it to go extremely smoothly.
I could avoid all that by having a health department nurse come here to "confirm" the birth but no way, no how am I having anyone in my home from the state. Call me a tin foil hat wearer, I'm just not doing it lol It would make me feel extremely uncomfortable.
I also want to print out a transfer plan just in case, mostly for the baby (no vax, no circ, etc) because if I transfer (God forbid) it will likely be for something pretty serious. Then I'll just put that away and not think of it again :)
PPH is probably my absolute last worry. It's so rare with home births.
perhaps...but why not be prepared for all possible events
I didn't say I'm not prepared, just not worried about it ;-)
I would love to print out this states rules on the birth cert/social for UC. May I ask where you found that stuff? You don't live in NY by any chance do you? lol.
Love it OrangeMoon! I don't have anything really, but I am constantly making mental lists. Your list looks really good and sounds like the kind of things we'll have on hand too. In place of the stones/beads I am going to print out some verses/scripture/pictures to put in my birthing space (or at least near the pool where I believe I'll at least labor for a while) for inspiration/protection.
I'm also putting together a one page sheet for hubby to remember in labor in case he gets flustered or in case I'm more comfortable laboring/birthing alone so he'll have productive things to do for me I think he'll really appreciate that too, he is a 'list' person. It would also be hints for myself as well, tips like a spoonful of honey helping to bring energy back up, or a cup of salty broth helping after labor to perk mama up if she's lost blood. Little suggestions for support, stuff like that.
I also feel so much better about the whole birth certificate process. For me, I have a "proof" of pregnancy because I had some prenatal care before letting my midwife go. I also made copies of the statues for my state dealing with how to register a birth with no attendant and got the facts. I know exactly what we need now. For example, the vital statistics lady told me the health dept doctor would "have to look the baby over" when we brought him in. NOT TRUE! According to the statutes in my state one of the options is "presenting" the baby with the parents (basically, bringing the babe with you to show there is indeed a baby and no one's running a scam) but no one is authorized to touch, examine, otherwise "look over" the baby. I think having info is important because if I didn't know, I might get scared/flustered. Also, she told me someone other than myself and my husband HAD to WITNESS the actual birth and sign a statement saying so. NOT TRUE. I need two statements of anyone who "knew of the circumstances of my birth" either prior to, or immediately after birth. So, my mom and friend will just do that even if they're not here, easy peasy. Unfortunately, I am going to have to jump through those hoops because the people at vital statistics are absolutely clueless to what to do for planned UC (as evidenced by my conversation with the woman). So, it will take me bringing copies of the actual statutes and so on as to not get any guff. I'm okay with that though, I expect it to go extremely smoothly.
I could avoid all that by having a health department nurse come here to "confirm" the birth but no way, no how am I having anyone in my home from the state. Call me a tin foil hat wearer, I'm just not doing it lol It would make me feel extremely uncomfortable.
I also want to print out a transfer plan just in case, mostly for the baby (no vax, no circ, etc) because if I transfer (God forbid) it will likely be for something pretty serious. Then I'll just put that away and not think of it again :)
PPH is probably my absolute last worry. It's so rare with home births.
perhaps...but why not be prepared for all possible events
I didn't say I'm not prepared, just not worried about it ;-)
indeed :)
I was so productive last night!
I prepared a folder that has the statutes for getting the BC along with the "proof" 
we need. In our state (not NY by the way, sorry OrangeMoon) they also want proof of residency in addition to like 5 other things to be able to register in a specific county if babe is born at home. If you have a midwife, they serve as verifying it, but if not you need to provide a utility bill or whatever. The laws in my state are fairly strict it seems compared to what others describe, but if one knows their rights and prepares accordingly one can put together the folder like I'm doing and just be done with it. I'll label that "Birth Certificate" and put it away.
I also created an "in case of Transfer" document. I only plan to transfer if I truly felt something was DIRE but it makes me feel more comfortable to have a plan in place. At the top it has my name, DOB, SS#, allergies, blood type, insurance info etc. Then, instructions. It's pretty assertive 
with a lot of "do not consents" in bold. If hospitals are trying to avoid litigation, they would probably respect my wishes the way it's written (never put 'do not prefer', that's not a consent/refusal). I told dh if we did need to transfer, to postpone filling out admission forms until after it was said and done (they have to treat you in an emergency) because the admission forms likely void out anything in my transfer plan . I'll put that away and not think of it again -- I do not intend on having to use it at all.
Now, I'm working on The List for hubby. I might also print out an APGAR scoring chart and a couple of other potentially useful docs, more for visual reference for dh. Using lists and charts make him feel more comfortable and creating lists and charts (even though I likely won't use them ) helps me feel more secure so anything I can do in advance to keep a mellow vibe is good.
That should be done in fairly short order then most of it can simply be out of sight/out of mind and I can use the last trimester to prepare (the most fun part!) through Scripture, prayer, affirmations, self-care, getting a few fun things for baby, nesting etc.
I was just coming here to say definitely save April, May and June utility bill to prove residency so you won't have to go finding it later, after baby, BTDT. I put it in a folder I have kept all my UC baby stuff, born babies on the left, unborn, current tummy baby info on the right.
I have not ever done urine testing strips. What purpose will they serve? In whatever you decide to do, look at what purpose it will serve for you, will it tell you info you need to know, can you listen to how your body is working to already know w/o a test, will it reassure you, etc?
Thanks for the tip Annabelle about the residency, waiting until closer to babe's 'due'. You're right, they might not accept it if it's over X months old. I'll make a note in my folder
Tracy, thanks so much --I totally realize part of my organization has to do with self-soothing or feeling more secure when things are in order. I'm sure I've got some kind of ADD/perfectionist tendencies going on, which is why physical clutter really affects me mentally/spiritually (in the home, for example). It's the same with things like this. Being the first time I'm embarking on UC, coupled with the negative climate in general toward it, and my residual fears, being organized and doing what is in my control helps me feel secure and thus able to deal with (or let go of) what I can't control, if that makes any sense. Practically speaking, I also want to appear as though this was a totally educated, well-planned decision in the event anyone gives me any hassle. So, while your compliment is wonderful, part of my mad skillz (lol) totally stem from being slightly neurotic ...
As far as the urine strips, I haven't gotten any. I was planning to, but meh. I just write "clear" under the 'urine' section of my prenatals. It's sort of all encompassing -- clear, as in no symptoms of UTI, clear as in almost literally - meaning I'm drinking enough water, clear as in an assumption all is cool since my BP is fine and the occasional glucose I take is fine. So, I agree with Annabelle's comments on that. I might change my mind if i felt it would give me more reassurance or piece of mind though.
I have a Q: Do I need a fetoscope, is that necessary so long as baby is moving all about? I don't know as I would even be able to get a HB since I'm a woman of size and those sound like they're somewhat tricky to get a HB with at times. I don't want to rent a Doppler either, but I'm wondering if it's really imperative to know baby's HB the entire time. This might seem like a really stupid Q, but what would one do if the HB wasn't as it should be (during pregnancy)? Schedule an U/S or...? ...and during labor, part of why I didn't want a midwife is because I didn't want the near constant HB checking they are required to do here. I wouldn't be opposed to checking it like once or twice but I don't know as I will even be in the position (literally or figuratively) to do that with a doppler much less a fetoscope. Help me out here ladies.
I have a Q: Do I need a fetoscope, is that necessary so long as baby is moving all about? I don't know as I would even be able to get a HB since I'm a woman of size and those sound like they're somewhat tricky to get a HB with at times. I don't want to rent a Doppler either, but I'm wondering if it's really imperative to know baby's HB the entire time. This might seem like a really stupid Q, but what would one do if the HB wasn't as it should be (during pregnancy)? Schedule an U/S or...? ...and during labor, part of why I didn't want a midwife is because I didn't want the near constant HB checking they are required to do here. I wouldn't be opposed to checking it like once or twice but I don't know as I will even be in the position (literally or figuratively) to do that with a doppler much less a fetoscope. Help me out here ladies.
Usually they want proof of residency showing that you lived in the state a month prior, the month of the birth and sometimes the month after, but that isn't always applicable if you call very soon after birth.
I have never had a fetescope, we just used the heartbeat thing you can buy at stores to listen to baby. I do now have a doppler, I bought it after I had a miscarriage and became pregnant the next month w/ my 9th. I have never listened to HB in labor, ever. Never felt the need. I have only ever listened to hear a HB, not ever to determine if HB was "right" or not. That seems pointless, in labor I guess not, but I go by my feelings and not numbers. I trust my sense of feeling something wrong wholeheartedly and not a machine spitting out data. I have also personally felt that HB in labor can vary so much, if they screw it up often in hospital sectioning mothers and their babies being born w/ great apgars then I could listen and feel anxiety about a certain number when things were well. My opinion is only one of many, but most UC'er I know have never listened to HB in labor.
Thanks so much for the input Annabelle, as usual I agree! I don't know what I would even do, like you're about to push and baby's hb is not "right" -- can you imagine being shuttled off to an emergency room? Yeah, that wouldn't cause stress to me or the baby at all . I go by instinct/gut too (in life) and I don't believe I've ever been steered wrong that way, no matter what the situation.
Thanks again!
My birth attendant never listened for the heartbeat during labor. I'm not planning on checking, either.
I did get urine strips, though, because I have a chronic bladder condition that can mimic infection. It's good to be able to confirm that I'm just having a flare when I need to.
I'm not sure if I've posted in this thread before, but: I'm planning a UC because I cannot find a midwife who trusts birth anywhere in this state. I'm actually quite looking forward to birthing without any kind of interference. With my first birth, my birth attendant was fantastic and amazingly hands-off, but her presence still threw me off, and I felt like there was more of a rush to get the placenta out than there needed to be. My husband and mother are on board with UC, though they do keep looking for midwives. We're not telling my in-laws, because they have a lot of fear around birth after having experienced multiple miscarriages.
I love being able to read about your experiences, Annabelle, and everyone's mental, spiritual, and physical preparation. It's quite reassuring. Thanks, y'all.
Annabelle and Tracy would you care sharing some of the things you have on your lists for hubby? Annabelle, I know you mentioned 'turning the water heater up'. Do you break your list into early labor/transition/etc or do you just put items as necessary? I asked my hubby if a list like this would be useful to him (I already knew the answer but I thought I'd ask anyway ) and he gave it a big thumb's up. 
I'm a bit stumped while making mine, though. I want it to be fairly short but also to encompass things that may be important for my comfort level. Thanks!
its funny....I'm planning on a hospital birth but the idea of giving my husband a broken down list for a hospital birth had never occured to me. My experience with hospital births here is the couple is largely left to their own devices during labor right up until about 10 minutes before delivery so there are some aspects where things are left up to us.
I mentioned it to him, making him a sort of algorithm, and he was very happy with the idea!
thanks for that :)
No probs, hope it helps you! I think personality has a lot to do with it, as well. My husband is amazing, wonderful, loving, supportive and all that good stuff but he's not incredibly intuitive when it comes to the innerworkings of my emotional and spiritual state during birth (and he's only had one other time to practice)
He is very much a 'what can I do' person who likes a guide of expectations. I don't want to generalize men, but this seems to be a fairly common theme among the women in my life with the men in their lives so I go with it :)
That's awesome about your midwife Tracy! What a nice way to 'end' things. She sounds awesome! I wrote mine an email too (no reply), then called her office and spoke with the office manager. The mw has never called me back 
The office manager is super nice and I'll be picking up my records/us report tomorrow or Tues and I am hoping to speak to the mw in person but who knows. I mean, she seemed very nice and I like her, I hope I'm just being paranoid and I'm not getting the 'cold shoulder'. Oh well whaddya gonna do...
Thanks for the tips about the list for hubby. LOL @ animals getting 'uppity'. I love the advice about turning off phones. We have only cells so I will ask hub to turn the ringers down. Great idea about covering the doorbell too. I was considering putting a small sign on the door too, but I don't know if that's a wonderful idea. I did that last time only because we lived in a very small private apartment community and my nice neighbors were all waiting for me to go in labor It was so we wouldn't get disturbed (we didn't). I also love the idea about getting foods ready for the kids -- dd is old enough that if things are accessible, she can do very simple preparation/snacking on her own so that's good.
Thanks so much!
Annabelle and Tracy would you care sharing some of the things you have on your lists for hubby? Annabelle, I know you mentioned 'turning the water heater up'. Do you break your list into early labor/transition/etc or do you just put items as necessary? I asked my hubby if a list like this would be useful to him (I already knew the answer but I thought I'd ask anyway ) and he gave it a big thumb's up.
I'm a bit stumped while making mine, though. I want it to be fairly short but also to encompass things that may be important for my comfort level. Thanks!
I have to dig out my list, will later today hopefully.
Sigh. I'm kind of down today. It seems like a huge uphill battle, this UC gig. It's how I've seen me birthing since I discovered I was pregnant and believe me, I didn't expect 100% support -- which is why we've told very few people, but I guess it's just sort wearing on me today, the lack of support. Like I have to hide a huge awesome part of this process with everyone, because you know everyone asks "what hospital" you're delivering at and when you say, oh another home birth, it can't just stop there, they have to ask "are you using the same midwife?" or "who's your midwife?" or, "do you like your midwife?" or, "is that legal?" (if they don't know you) or whatever. It's just, ugh. Then I have to side-step things because no way in he!! am I telling random people about uc'ing. They can't handle it At least the few people I've revealed it to in the local natural birthing community/mama's group have heard of it even if they wouldn't choose it. I know I shouldn't have to have anyone's support in order for me to be happy and excited about it, and thank God I have my husband supporting me 100%. My best friend, mom, and sister support me too albeit in a 'it's your body and if you're going to choose this, we'll support you' type way and not in a "UC, awesome!Your body was made for this!" type way lol
One of my fears now is that all this pressure is on me and if anything were to go wrong (even mildly), all the blame and "I told you sos" and whispers about how I decided to do it "alone" and look what happened will all be heaped on me (in addition to the feelings I'll already have if anything did go wrong). That's what people want to do when something they wouldn't choose goes wrong. Chastise you for choosing it and tell you it could have been avoided (even if it couldn't in reality) if you had only done it their way.
Oh well, onward and upward. I have to just create a bubble around myself and not let any of that get to me. Thanks for listening, so glad there are others on this journey along with me 
sounds like you have to identify and shake off some fears to be able to relax and enjoy the process
fwiw I think being able to do the UC thing is great!
I think most mamas have similar worries no matter where they decide to birth, they all want a healthy baby and there's no 100% guarantee of that until babe is safely in your arms, though statistics are stacked in favor of a healthy babe regardless. The thing with UC is that there's this whole climate surrounding it that's largely negative and misunderstood. In some places and with some people it can be downright mean and hostile. It just adds a whole dynamic that is a bit more difficult (in my experience with it thus far) to shake off or get to that ~happy place~ about.
I've said from the beginning, and this is how I conduct other areas of my life as well, that I will not allow fear or external circumstances/opinions to dictate my choices -- and I won't. I am excited and happy about the UC and birth in general but I would be lying to say the internal work and emotional process leading up to it is not without it's 'bumps'.
The blessing to all this is it's advancing my Spiritual growth and faith in God and increasing my discipline in guiding my own emotions rather than allowing circumstances or other opinions to guide them.
I'm feeling a lot better and it does help to have a safe place to hash it all out 
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