17 mo old at wedding and reception?

[RooRooDog]

My brother-in-law is getting married in a month, and we just received the invites. It is to be at 6 pm- a short ceremony, then small plates, drinks, and dancing. All this will be taking place at a brewery.  When I read DH the invitation, I told him I would line up babysitting for our daughter.  His response was, "We don't need a babysitter. She's coming with us." 

Am I the only one that thinks a 17 mo old is a little out of place at a beer-themed wedding reception that may last late into the night where there are no other children????  He looked at me like I was crazy when I suggested we leave her at home.

[dalia]

I would leave her at home unless it was a day wedding. Definitely!

[Courtney-Ostaff]

17 months is waaaay too young to take to a formal ceremony like a wedding. Or a funeral.  Definitely a babysitter.  You may have to cut your night short, though. ;)

[Skippy918]

We took our then 21 month old to my cousin's wedding.  My cousin actually wanted him there.  Since it was out of town, a babysitter wasn't an option and we were flying home the next day.  My son had a great time dancing the night away, but we didn't get to have much fun cause we along with my parents were chasing him around all over the dance floor.  I really wasn't able to enjoy myself as much as I wanted to. 

If you have the option of getting a sitter, do it.

[ellemenope]

I would first make sure that she is explicitly invited.  I have been to many a weddings where there were no children present because there were not wanted by the bride and groom.  I have left DD home in those cases with a sitter.  Of course, these were formal weddings that did not start until 7 and went into the early hours of the morning.

My sister just got married and she did not invite children and did not want children there save the flower girl and ring bearer.  DD was the flower girl.  At 29 months she was not a problem at all.  She literally danced around in circles the entire time and then crashed at about 11:45.  I think she did add much enjoyment to our evening, although we did then leave early.  (I was also so proud of her for walking down the aisle just perfectly.  She even guided a reluctant ring bearer, too.  And, she did not make a peep during the ceremony except to ask daddy very very loudly, "why is mommy crying up there?")

Hmm, I think it would depend on the temperament of the child.  I think I would have worried less about DD at 17 months than 29 months, but I am sure others might think the opposite.

[crunchy_mommy]

I wouldn't even hesitate & have brought DS to several weddings, he's always had a great time & everyone loved watching him dance etc.! DS stays up late anyway but I get bored after a few hours so use DS as an excuse to leave early lol.

Just ditto to the pp that said to make sure she is invited since many people lately don't want kids at weddings.... also if you really want to just let go & party & not be dealing with DD then that would be another good reason to get a sitter...

[kittykat2481]

If my sister were getting married, she would want my son there. I would take him, knowing that I'd have to either leave early, or have someone take him home by 9 or 10. I think it just depends on the family dynamics. If you want to stay late and party hardy, you might prefer a babysitter though. lol

[lactatinggirl]

We took DD to a wedding and reception that was at night when she was 19 months. We sat in the back row during the ceremony (and I was extra ready to pop a boob in her mouth if she got fussy) and only stayed at the reception long enough to say congrats to my friend and eat a little something. We left right about at her bedtime and she fell asleep on the way home. She hardly ever cried as a baby though so I felt pretty confident that she wouldn't be crying or anything during the whole thing.

[texmati]

My son is 16 mos and in that inbetween stage where he's harder to pacify than a baby, but more diffucult to reason with than a kid. I'd ask the bride-- small kids were more than welcome at my noisy 3 hour Hindu wedding and completely dry reception. But at other wedding's I've been to lately, I would have waited outside for the meat of the wedding ceremony (DS is loud), and been prepared to remove him during speeches for the reception as well.

[JudiAU]

Yep. Get a babysitter.

[mamazee]

Did the invite have your dd's name on it or say "Mr. and Mrs. XX and Family"?  If not, then I'd assume children aren't invited.  If her name was on it or it said "family" then I'd assume she is invited.  I'd personally want a babysitter in that situation if practical anyway because it sounds like it wouldn't be much fun with a toddler.

[Friday13th]

Regardless of whether she's invited or not, a 17 month old at an evening wedding at a brewery sounds like a nightmare.  At that age DS was into EVERYTHING and couldn't sit still to save his life.  He wouldn't have fallen asleep and would have gotten progressively more and more wound up and probably been really disruptive.  And DH and I would have had to take turns walking around with him and trying to keep him from destroying flower arrangements.  So yeah, get a sitter (and I almost never leave my kids, I hate it but I absolutely would in that situation...or not go but that's more because I also hate weddings)

[mbm]

I'd get the sitter.  You will enjoy the wedding much more!

We left DD in the care of a sitter for the ceremony and the late part of the reception at my brother's wedding.  We brought her to the early part of the reception to show her off, but put her to sleep at the hotel with the sitter at the first sign of crankiness.  It was a good compromise.

[batsister]

I took my son to my cousin's wedding when he was 11 months old (and running all over the place).  It never occurred to anyone that he would not attend, and there were other toddlers there.  That said, it was a daytime wedding, and the church had an area at the back with a plexiglass wall and a speaker so that those of us with toddlers/babies could see and hear the ceremony without anyone hearing our kids.  He had fun running around, eating, etc. at the reception.

[marispel]

We took DS to a wedding when he was 21 months and he was fine when there was music and activity, but as soon as everything got quiet for the ceramony he started talking.  We told him to be quiet and that upset him.  Needless to say, we got out of the church very quickly.    I did take new books, toys and snacks, but with all the activity he was not interested.    We sat in the back and were able to escape very quickly.

We took DS to my parents 50th anniversary - renewal of their vows.  DS was then 27 months.    He did the same. exact. thing.    Even at both receptions, it was fun but we didn't get to enjoy ourselves because we were watching him the whole time.  It's not like he can run around free willy - I would HIGHLY recommend getting a babysitter or at least bringing one along to help out.

[goldenwillow]

I personally would take my kiddo.  He loves that kind of atmosphere.

I recently got hitched in October.  DS was 16 months at the time and is very mobile.  Our wedding was at an art gallery-former co op with kegs and wine being served and we had music.  I did not hesitate to have my friends bring their children.  The youngest in attendance was 2 months.  That said, I was wise to have an area for mama's to check in with their babes that was a tad hidden and not a sensory overload.  Is there a spot at the brewery where you could do that?  When it starts getting into the late brewery fun time... take off.  Most breweries allow LO's until 9 or 10.