It's so interesting what different people are OK with - this is exactly the reason we used pacifiers. DH's brother regularly sucked his thumb until he was 12 and it apparently creeped DH out (he has clear memories of it though he was a couple years younger) so he was definitely pro-pacifier because you can eventually phase a pacifier out, but you can't really get rid of someone's thumb. That was actually how we gauged the kids' readiness to give up the pacifier, by whether they started sucking on their fingers or not when we kept it from them. When they got to the point where there were no tears and no finger sucking replacing it, they were ready to give it up.
Thoughts on pacifiers - Page 3
So when ds was born a paci never touched his lips I wasnt about to have a replay of the disaster they caused with dd. He slept better than dd thankfully.
If I had it to do over the paci would have disappeared after dd came home from the hospital.
My current 1-month-old is a whole other story. He doesn't want a binkie during times of actual distress. (He was hospitalized for 3 days last week, and every nurse/dr./tech tried to "calm" him with the binkie even though I told them it wouldn't work.) He wants it when he's nearly asleep, right after coming off the breast like a pp mentioned. In fact, as I'm typing this, he's got the bink in his mouth and his forehead on my bare breast. I call it his transition, lol. Otherwise, he'll scream when I attempt to move him.
That's how my 5 month old is:) He has always had a very high suck need! When he was tiny we were desperate and gave him a paci but it interfered with nursing so after a day or two, away it went!! Now I am able to give it to him after he has nursed to sleep, when I need to lay him down and get stuff done!! Other than that, he prefers the real thing;)
Some kids just need a pacifier and some don't! If parenthood has taught me anything it is that every baby is different and what works for one may not for another! To each his/her own!
I sucked my thumb until I was five, and I now have an overbite, TMJ and a gap between my teeth. My parents tried to get me to stop, but I was inconsolable without my thumb, it was so bad I actually had a callus. I did not want that for my child, and I did my best to avoid it.
I think like anything else you will find some bad stories like mine and some good ones where paci use is concerned. After my experiences I will strongly encourage anyone who asks to avoid paci use but I realize that not everyone will have the same experience I did with dd.
I saw that too and it affirmed my thought process of using a pacifier instead of my baby sucking on my finger. I know I don't wash my hands as much as I should. At this stage (she's almost 1 month) it seems like a more hygenic solution, especially for car rides and in her crib when she's napping.
My son used one until age 5, only at nights by then in helping him fall asleep, and it caused no oral damage. Did other parents judge us? Yes. But did our dentist? No, he told us to let our son wean naturally, which he did. He has no issues from this, such as oral problems or persistent sucking tendencies. He does not suck his fingers or thumb. He seems to be emotionally well-adjusted.
I'm not going to judge other parents for the choices they make in parenting, for every kid is different. Completely, utterly different. Something that may work for me may not work for you. So please don't assume that your techniques are the only way to go simply b/c they work for your child.
I have 3 kids, ages 15, 2 and 4months.
My 15 year old got a pacifier (we call them do-dahs here) right away. I had absolutely NO issues with them. She got it whenever she wanted. We got rid of it sometime after her 3rd birthday. That was actually a big year for her, between her 3rd and 4th birthday. She got rid of the bottle, the do-dah, she potty trained AND got a big girl bed, all in that one year. It was a big transition year.
Anyway, I just got sick of buying them, trying to find a lost one, it was a mess. So, one day, I decided I wasn't buying any more. I sat her down, we had a talk about being a big girl (lots of big girl talks that year,) and talked about getting rid of all the do-dahs. I had her gather the few that we still had in the house and she threw them in the trash. It really wasn't a big deal for us, obviously, she was as ready as I was.
My 2 year old (just turned 2 in November) still uses one to sleep. It stays in her room, after she gets up, it gets left on her bed, right next to her stuffed Mickey that she sleeps with also. I don't let them downstairs at all, because otherwise we spend an hour or so at night scrambling to find it. But, because it's upstairs, it's easy to only use it to sleep with.
My 4 month old gets a do-dah occasionally. She doesn't have a super high sucking need, but like dd2, once she's done eating, if there's still milk coming out of the boob, she doesn't want it. Pop in a do-dah and she gets her last bit of sucking need out, then pops it out after like 2 minutes or so. She also uses it to fall asleep, but doesn't need it to stay asleep. She doesn't need it much other than those two times.
I didn't have time to read all of the responses, but here is my experience.
With my first ds, I had to go back to work full time when he was 8 weeks old. Dh took care of him while I was gone and since he had no breasts to soothe him with, he gave him a pacifier. Ds1 was instantly hooked and adored his "puckey" until just after his third birthday. Man was it a PITA having to make sure we always had his puckey, but ds1 had an extremely high sucking need and mama wasn't around to soothe him.
With ds2 I've been extremely priveleged to be able to stay home full time and nurse him on demand. Ds2 also has a very strong sucking need and I know that he would have loved a pacifier, but I just didn't want to have to deal with one this time around. When ds2 is feeling overwhelmed or insecure, he'll often suck on his thumb and I'm totally cool with that. You can never forget a thumb or a boob at home, and they're super easy to find in bed in the middle of the night :)
When our little guy was born, my partner and I were both against it... but we couldn't really explain why. Later we realized that our reason was that we didn't want to parent in a way that if our babe fusses, we "shut him up, with a paci". However, after our babe was born, he indeed had very high sucking needs. If he didn't have my boob in his mouth he would suck on our fingers. This was fine in the first several weeks - after he was done nursing, I would replace my boob with my pinky... and then I would take my pinky out and he would stay asleep. But as the stay at home mama, I was struggling to get anything done as I was laying for two hours with my pinky in my sons mouth while he napped when he wouldn't let me take it out. My partner was still against it until she was home with him one evening while I was out working and she had the same issue. He also screamed in the car too. We still didn't want to buy a paci. Finally a few weeks later (he was 3 or 4 months at this time) I finally bought one, which he quickly spit out. We tried another kind... and then he started taking it... and my life changed!! He is now almost 7 months and he sometimes wants it and sometimes doesn't. He also sucks his thumb too.
whatever decision you.....er... or you're little one makes... know that it's your decision! best of luck.