How to grieve not having a homebirth...(due in two weeks)

[momtoS]

I found out this morning that I can not have a home birth. NOT AT ALL. I had low hemoglobin in December and took iron supplements, ate iron rich foods etc. My count didn't go up AT ALL.....it stayed the exact same number.

Too low for the midwives to deliver at home.

I have cried pretty much all day.

Are there any tips to helping me get through this?????

[birthgreeter]

Sorry 

Are you anemic?  Are you having other signs and symptoms of anemia?

Every midwife is different with what they want a Hgb to be at or if they even check it at all.  Some midwives do not even check this.  Everyone is different.  

Was the test done in the home?  Or sent out to a lab?

 If I am getting a low reading on the device I use in the home, I will often send out a blood sample to a lab to confirm what I am getting.  I will also do a  CBC, Platelet count and (rare-but  if needed have your coagulation factors checked...)

I suggest that you see a physician and have labs done if you midwife can not do them (some midwives do not have access to a lab) If you do have anemia, you might need a B12 injection along with some other medications (sometimes the medical route is needed) 

But for other natural things, there are items out there to help raise your blood count, such as floridex, liquid chlorophyll, lots of greens (as you said you have been doing) also proferrin, (need to have your midwife get this or a doctor) and many other items...check with your local health food store too and see what they carry to help. 

Caffeinated drinks works against your body being able to absorb the iron, so does soy products, also do not take the Iron at the same time as you do dairy products or calcium supplements.  They sort of cancel each other out.    Vit C helps with the absorption of the Iron.  

Herbs that help:  (I make my ladies a herbal tincture if they need it) Yellow dock and Nettles.  Some women find that black strap molasses helps them too.

Hope some of this info helps you out!
 

[First Time Mama]

 I'm sorry. I have planned a home birth for each of my two children, but had to transfer in labor to the hospital both times. The first time I had a cesarean, and this time (just a month ago) I was still able to vbac. I am in the same place, grieving my lost home births. I may never have another child, so I also may be grieving the fact that I may never have a home birth. I am sorry. Birth is never perfect, I hope you can still have a positive experience, even if it isn't your ideal. I've been there.

[CookAMH]

This doesn't answer your actual question and you may not be open to trying anything now, but I was reading recently on here about cell salts, and the cell salt that helps with iron was mentioned in the thread by a woman who almost risked out of homebirth for the same issue but got it turned around. Let me see if I can find the actual thread....

http://www.mothering.com/community/forum/thread/1188755/tell-me-about-cell-salts#post_14999572

here is what she used http://www.1-800homeopathy.com/cell-salts/single-remedy-cell-salts/ferrum-phos.html

but maybe it is too late, I don't know. Use of the cell salts in companion with the essential supplements you are already doing or were mentioned in the previous post could yield results. It seems the cell salts can in essence open pathways for your body to absorb the nutrients you're taking in.

But for grieving, I would think that journaling out all your thoughts and disappointments surrounding this would be very helpful.  Now, near the birth, after the birth, etc.

[newcastlemama]

I found this info a while back that may be helpful to you:

http://drbrewerpregnancydiet.com/id57.html 

 It is ironic that many low-risk hospital birthing rooms and most out-of-hospital birthing centers and home birth practitioners "risk out" mothers whose hematocrits fall below 34! That is, the mothers on good diets whose blood volumes are the most expanded and who present the least chance of any complications at delivery are labeled "high-risk" and denied the birth experience they have worked so hard for.  

There is more info on the link.....

[noahs.mom06]

I'm sorry! I had to give up my homebirth during my last pregnancy at 28 weeks, because we found a birth defect in DD. It was really hard, but obviously necessary... I didn't end up grieving the loss of the birth I had wanted before DD was born, because I threw myself into learning about her birth defect and what to expect and what parts of the labor/birth/afterwards we could still do "normally"... and after she was born I had a lot of days where I found myself dwelling on the "it's not fair" aspects of everything. No one understood though, they couldn't understand how when I knew we did things the way they needed to be done, I could still be sad that we couldn't do things the way I had wanted to. I think journaling is a great idea, as is talking to other people who've been through the same thing, or who can at least acknowledge that there is something to grieve in not having the birth that you wanted...

[djsnjones]

On the subject of blood volume and Hgb/Hct, I agree with the earlier quote from the Brewer website, and I highly recommend this parallel article by Anne Frye that was published in Midwifery Today.  Perhaps your midwife would re-consider her earlier stance if you would show her these sources.....

http://www.naturalchildbirth.org/mambo/index.php?option=articles&task=viewarticle&artid=44&Itemid=3

As the blood volume increases by 60%, as it is supposed to in well-nourished pregnant women, the Hgb/Hct will appear to fall.  If it stays the same or rises, that is a sign of the blood volume falling, which usually triggers the PE process, as well as a rising BP, increasing edema, IUGR, HELLP, premature contractions, and low birth weight.

Joy