You posted this a while ago, but I just joined and saw it. My thoughts are that things could go either way, no matter what you do. Try to help him not to take it personally. If she cries or doesn't reach for him, it isn't because she doesn't like him. I'll share our story briefly. My hubs first deployment was in Oct. 2006. Our son was born Nov. 2006. He is adopted and we had started the process just before hubs deployed. When our adoption was finalized, ds was 8 months old exactly and I had seen him once before at 3 months for a week. R&R got messed up so dh hadn't seen ds except in pictures and after an extension, he came home in Dec. 07. DS was days away from 14 months old. DH and I talked often about what to expect when he redeployed. We skyped when we could and ds carried a picture from our wedding. I talked about "daddy" all the time. But, nothing takes the place of physical proximity! DS took a day or two, but these two are inseparable now and were from about day 2.
Now, I thought it might also relate since I picked ds up at 8 months old. At that age, they're starting to "like" people for more than just meeting their needs, but it's still the most important thing. He cried that first night and somehow I felt that it was a "I miss that mom who took care of me" cry, but he still wanted me. I think a lot of it was just him being unsure if he could trust me to take care of him. Day 2 was a new day and WE are also inseparable!
Breathe and don't get too worked up. It sounds like you're doing the best you can to make his voice and face familiar. Just remember that she's going to be used to you and need some time to learn to trust him. On the opposite side, don't be surprised if she drops you like a bad habit and only wants daddy! That's about what happened to us and *I* was the one saying, "HEY, what about me?!" lol
If you ever want to chat about it, feel free to send me a message!