We're scheduled for 39+4 on February 7, but I'm trying to coax baby boy out to let him pick his birthday too! My MIL loves to tell the story of how when she was pregnant with DH her water broke when she was in the middle of baking a pie (yes, she finished the pie before heading to the hospital). So, I'm doing lots of baking and wafting fresh pies in front of my belly in hopes that he'll smell it and realize that Earthside is a nice place to be .
The nice thing about Feb. 7 for us is that it's a Monday, which is very convenient with the way our support system is going to work. I know that birth isn't supposed to be convenient (and hopefully he'll decide to arrive before then!), but, heck, if I'm scheduling it for medical reasons, it might as well be at a convenient time, kwim?
What have you written on your calendar? I was going to write "Eliot joins us!" but now his name might not be Eliot ... maybe I'll just put a heart and the time. Silly? Yes. But, I have to look at the calendar all month! I want it to be good!
These all seem like petty things, and I'm sure I'm reinforcing everyone's worst stereotypes of scheduled cesareans, but I'm tired of feeling like I have to defend my decision to have a cesarean birth or put a certain kind of "face" on it. I know that I'm informed, and that I'm making the choice to have the birth that will be safest in my particular circumstance, about which very few people know full details (and the people who do know full details are intimately involved in the decision-making process, i.e., DH. And that's about it.). It really bugs me when people feel qualified to criticize my choice, or assume that I'm uninformed because I'm making a different choice than they are in their personal situation. I'm also bugged by how much VBAC-er's are celebrated for being SO BRAVE, frankly. Don't get me wrong, I think VBAC is an awesome thing, is unquestionably the best choice for lots of women, and if it's the decision you come to, then that's great! You deserve to be supported in your decision. I just don't think that having a VBAC makes anyone braver than anyone else - or that having a repeat cesarean makes us less brave or worthy of support, which is the flip side of that coin. I feel incredibly brave for going through pregnancy at all after my first experience with pregnancy, and I get really tired of people assuming that someone's road to a VBAC has been more difficult than mine has been towards ERCS. Going with a scheduled cesarean has been one of the very hardest decisions I've ever had to make, and it sucks to be judged for it by people who don't know me or my situation. I don't mean to hijack your thread, but it's nice to get this off of my chest.
When I'm feeling annoyed by the judgment/assumptions that are thrown at me sometimes within a community that is usually so supportive, I remember that the people who are judging my choice are actually the ignorant ones, and also think of the Dr. Seuss quote, "Be who you are, and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." The people who matter understand why I'm doing what I'm doing, not least myself - I understand why I'm doing what I'm doing, and so the people who don't understand, well, they don't matter very much to me.