...you knew for a FACT that they wouldn't notice?
We have made four out-of-state moves, and DH has boxes that have made the move every time that are never opened again at our new destination. For example, he has a whole box of hiking boots. He has "replaced" these boots many times over.
Other things too. Like, he buys a raincoat to replace a raincoat with a hole in it, and never disposes of the old raincoat. Fast forward a month or two, and he sees the raincoat with a hole in it again and replaces is again. See, he has a really bad memory. Really bad. So now we have two new-ish raincoats and a raincoat with a hole in it. Then a couple months later, he forgets that one of the raincoats he just bought is lined, sees the same old unlined raincoat with a hole in it, and buys yet another raincoat with lining because, you see, he needs a lined one because it's colder now. Seriously. Now we are overrun with raincoats. Now imagine this happening with nearly everything he owns (fountain pens, shoes of all kinds, tshirts, sweatshirts, socks, underwear, movies, books) and you can imagine how this stuff adds up.
We also have a problem with journals and pads of paper. He buys them in massive quantities and never uses them. Ever. We have about 20 large pads of art paper that I would like to donate to the art teacher at DD's school. Same with watercolor paper. Same with unlined journals. Just tons and tons. He doesn't know how many we have, and I'm positive he wouldn't miss them if I donated half of them.
I also feel that once the excessive clutter is gone, he will be able to SEE what he has already, and make use of what he has.
BUT, I can't help but feel that it would be a HUGE violation of him to dispose of his stuff without express permission. However, if I ask him, he'll make an excuse to hang onto this stuff and again, never ever actually use it (we've been married 10 years, so I know how this goes LOL)
Would you make this stuff "disappear"? Or should I try, yet again, to convince DH to do it himself? Is there some other way to deal with it? (like, if you don't wear this coat this winter, it goes to Goodwill? Or, if you don't actually start doing art within the next 3 months, we donate the supplies?) I don't think I have the right to make ultimatums, but seriously, I'm buried here!
ETA: DH's constant re-buying if things he doesn't need and doesn't use also ties up most of our budget. I have been unable to buy DDs raincoats for 2 years. I don't have snow boots or rain boots of my own. I have one light-weight coat because we never have the money to buy a "real" winter coat for me (we live in New England!). I have no winter gloves or mittens. So, I guess this is a compulsive shopping thing too. It sucks.