When would you feel comfortable with...

[babydanielsmom]

putting two kids in the same bed? Here's the situation ...we have two boys ( ds1 is 3.5 yrs and Ds2 is 7 months) and we are thinking of (further down the road) putting the boys in the same bed in their own room. We have always co-slept and we want to handle this as gently as possible. So, the question is how the heck do we go about it? What age does Sam (Ds2) need to be to safely co sleep with Ds1? What size bed would you buy? Or should we buy two beds in case they don't feel like cosleeping all the time? I have talked to Ds1 about having his own room and was told a flat out NO WAY. But when I suggested that Sam could maybe share his bed one day he was really excited about that. Oh, and one last weird question...we have a 5 bedroom house...do you think it's weird that they'll be in the same room in the same bed...but as I sit here and type this I realize how stupid that sounds b/c all 4 of us are in the room now. 

[Chamomile Girl]

I don't have experience with this personally but I have a good friend who put her kids in the same bed when the younger was around 2. However there is a large age gap between them so the elder was like ten by then.

I love the idea of the children sharing a bed. The night always seems less daunting when someone is there with you. I think a double bed should be fine...but if you have concerns about one of them needing their own sleeping space some day you could always get a bunk bed with a double on the bottom and a twin on top.

[blessedwithboys]

I don't think it's a problem, but make sure that you set up the appearance of separate beds, bc you never know when some nosy person will make trouble for you.  Just to CYA, ya know?  A bunk with twin on top and full on bottom is perfect.

[babydanielsmom]

Thanks ladies, I was thinking of setting up the room with 2 full size beds, 2 dressers...that sort of thing. one of the main things that I was concerned about was the age thing...not that Ds2 is small by any means..he's 21lbs and 28ish inches long at 7 months. Now that I think about it maybe I should worry about him rolling over and squishing Ds1. He's my skinny dude weigh in in at 32lbs  (he's 3.5yrs)

[babydanielsmom]

Anyone else? TIA

[mandalamama]

my youngest step-children (boy and girl) shared a bed until both of them started school. they were just under a year apart. i had separate twin beds for them in the same room but one always crawled in with the other one during the night and they slept so much better that way. sometimes they'd both climb in their big sister's (age 9) full-size bed and i'd find them all lined up in the morning, well slept!

once my step-son started kindergarten he wanted more independence and they all started off the night in their own beds. if they were playing musical beds in their sleep, big sis threw them both out when she was 10 because she couldn't get to sleep. sometimes i'd find the two youngest together again, like on a night with a thunderstorm. i think you just have to listen to them and observe, as long as they're healthy and happy, you know?

[GoBecGo]

I shared with my sister (16 years between us!) on and off until i was 7 or 8, and my brother sometimes too.

If it were me i'd just set up the room for them to have a bed each and let them decide where to sleep themselves.  I'm dreading it actually, because DD1 HATED to co-sleep and slept badly when anyone else was in her space, and DD2 is a little snugglebabe and LOVES to be curled up tight with someone else to sleep....might be looking at bed wars when DD2 is old enough to get into DD1's bed! lol

[chel]

i'm waiting until dd2 can get on and off the bed safely. well and night weans

[Friday13th]

Mine are 2.5 years apart and I'm thinking when DS2 is nightweaned (sometime around 2?) I'd like to move them in together.  I have horrible memories of laying alone in the dark, terrified, as a child so I'm really hesitant to move DS1 into a room alone.  (I'm sure my experience was unusual, I'm not slamming anyone who's kids sleep alone, it's just my hangup) I think they'll be happier in a bed together, they're both really cuddly sleepers.

I'm thinking of a bunk bed with a double on the bottom, that way if they need a grown-up, DH or I could lay in there with them.

[sunnygir1]

My los are 2y7m apart.  Ds is 16 months and not yet night-weaned.  I am planning, as a pp said, to transition him to dds bed when he can climb in and out of bed, when he's better at falling asleep without much parenting, and when he's ready to night wean.  I'm actually thinking that sleeping with her might be part of the night-weaning transition.  Dd night weaned and moved to her own bed around 17-18 months.  I don't know if ds will be ready for that -- I'd probably have to put dds mattress on the floor again.  I have no idea how it will go; will they play or fight?  or will they actually fall asleep well together?  They both love cosleeping, so I have high hopes that they will sleep well together.

We don't have an extra room or space for another bed in dds room, so they are just going to have to share for now.  Dds tiny room is mostly filled with her full sized bed.  We have another small room that is an office/library/toy room at the moment, which may well become a kid room if we are still in this house when we feel they need their own rooms.

[Thandiwe]

My sons are 5.5 yo and 3 yo.  They have shared a bed for nearly 2 years now.  Granted, they don't always *sleep* in it, and only lately have they started going to bed in it, but they share a bed when they are.  It's a full-size.  I would think your kids are fine to start now.

[sunnygir1]

Originally Posted by Thandiwe 

My sons are 5.5 yo and 3 yo.  They have shared a bed for nearly 2 years now.  Granted, they don't always *sleep* in it, and only lately have they started going to bed in it, but they share a bed when they are.  It's a full-size.  I would think your kids are fine to start now.

With a 7 month old baby?!  I would never have put my 7 month old in bed with my 3yo -- totally not safe from my perspective.
 

[Thandiwe]

Oops!!  I read 2y7mos in quick passing.  My bad!  Obviously not.

 

Originally Posted by sunnygir1 

Originally Posted by Thandiwe 

My sons are 5.5 yo and 3 yo.  They have shared a bed for nearly 2 years now.  Granted, they don't always *sleep* in it, and only lately have they started going to bed in it, but they share a bed when they are.  It's a full-size.  I would think your kids are fine to start now.

With a 7 month old baby?!  I would never have put my 7 month old in bed with my 3yo -- totally not safe from my perspective.
 

[Thandiwe]

But on a different note, everyone has to do what works for them, but yes we have always family-bedded, which included a newborn and all people in the same bed.  We have 5 people in our family, and at certain points throughout the night, all have been in bed at the same time.  We have done what works for our family; we have never placed a 7 mos old alone with a 3 year old in a bed, though.  We have always been present to provide a physical barrier. 

[babydanielsmom]

OP here. No, I won't be putting the 7 mo old in the bed with the 3 yr old . Some days I feel like I would like a "grown up" bedroom again though. In our master bedroom we have a side cared crib bed, our King size bed, and then Ds1's twin size bed ALL down the side of one wall. It's literally one entire wall of bed. I mean we still have the rocker recliner and the furniture  stuff in there, but  I have hopes of one day having a NICE bedspread that no one had spit up on, kwim. Then I think the day they move into their own room I'll be  going to go sleep with them b/c I'll miss them so much !!!

[ameliabedelia]

Safety wise...I think by age 1 1/2 it would be fine.  You younger child may not be ready at that age, but I think that is big enough to "hold their own" in the bed with the bigger child.