I'm currently 32 weeks pregnant with my third child. Right before I became pregnant, I had just completed a three-day doula training. After taking the course, I decided that I would absolutely want a doula present for any future births, because I had a c-section with the first (which I'm certain was completely unnecessary), and a prolonged labor with the second which I was able to have VBAC, but still had an epidural. I just instinctively feel that I can avoid unnecessary interventions and protracted labor with the help of a doula.
So, we had a doula lined up for this birth, someone my partner and I have both known for many years, and she just backed out due to health problems. My partner's response was, "Oh no! That's too bad. Well, you'll be fine. You don't need a doula, you've got me. Plus, you ARE a doula!". Which I'm not, of course, I just completed a training. I haven't attended any births. I think my partner was O.K. with the doula we were going to have because she knew her, but feels threatened by the idea of someone we don't know being there for the birth. I'm pretty sure she's hurt that I think I need anyone besides her there. How do I express my desire for a doula-assisted birth that doesn't hurt my partner's feelings or make her feel displaced in any way?