she's singing the alphabet backwards...

[majormajor]

and she's reciting, in about 5 seconds, the list of 50 words that the kindergarteners are supposed to learn to sight read by the end of the year. both little tricks are actually pretty funny, but they make my heart sink. all i can picture is DD, so bored at school, that she's memorizing these things in an effort to entertain herself.

that, and she's complained that they do "baby math" at school.

i don't really have a question i think, i just feel like venting and maybe getting some advice or perspectives.

the math thing is easier to address i guess. i have talked to her teacher, and DD is supposed to be getting more difficult math, but she says it mostly isn't happening. and even when she has done math that is more advanced than her classmates (for example, adding when they were comparing numbers), it's still well below the level she's working at on her own at home. i was thinking that i could send a folder of work to school with DD so that she could do her own stuff while the other kids were doing their thing. does that sound reasonable?

as far as reading goes, that started off well... her teacher was really excited about how well DD read at the beginning of the year, but now DD tells me she mostly just reads alone, "because she doesn't need any help with the words."

i'm just starting to feel like, why is she there? to read on her own and do math well below what she likes to do? i don't want to homeschool, but i'm starting to feel like it's unfair to make her go.

her attitude fluctuates... some days she's super excited, some days she wants to stay home. i keep her home a lot, she missed 13 days in the first trimester, with more half-days where i took her home after lunch.

i plan to talk to the first grade teachers this spring and find out which one will offer her more in the classroom... but any ideas on how to get more work at her level right now?

[reezley]

I would not be happy with the situation for your dd either.  I think it's reasonable to have another meeting with the teacher and brainstorm what else can be done.   My ds1 is in K now, at a similar level to your dd.  His teacher seems to mostly be trying to provide extra challenge for him though.  Not quite at the level he works on at home, but enough to keep him from sitting there memorizing a list of 50 words (that is sad, in a way, isn't it!).   I think your dd's teacher might appreciate your providing a folder for her to work on at school.  When I asked ds's teacher if bringing in his math workbook from home would be helpful, she sounded open to it - although for now we're going with her suggestion to do some different math on the computer in the classroom.  (Not sure if that's a great solution, but going with it for now.)

As for the "why is she there" question - are there not other "specials" in the day - art, music, gym?  When ds comes home excited about something he did that day it's usually in whichever of those he had that day.  There should be so much more to the day than just learning to read and doing some math.

  Quote:

Originally Posted by majormajor 

the math thing is easier to address i guess. i have talked to her teacher, and DD is supposed to be getting more difficult math, but she says it mostly isn't happening. and even when she has done math that is more advanced than her classmates (for example, adding when they were comparing numbers), it's still well below the level she's working at on her own at home. i was thinking that i could send a folder of work to school with DD so that she could do her own stuff while the other kids were doing their thing. does that sound reasonable?

as far as reading goes, that started off well... her teacher was really excited about how well DD read at the beginning of the year, but now DD tells me she mostly just reads alone, "because she doesn't need any help with the words."

i'm just starting to feel like, why is she there? to read on her own and do math well below what she likes to do? i don't want to homeschool, but i'm starting to feel like it's unfair to make her go.

[akmbloom]

I have a daughter in K in a similar situation.  She's in advanced reading (they said she reads at a 1st grade level, but according to the online stats I looked at AND her grandma who was a 3rd grade teacher, she's actually reading at a 4th grade level, chapter books etc) but they don't do advanced math... though she can add and subtract.  She often says they don't learn anything at school... we are wondering what to do - homeschooling could be an option but I'm not sure how it would work (and she needs the social stimulation, plus I feel like our families would be pretty disapproving).  So, I don't really have advice for you but share your frustration.

My DD, like the poster above, likes specials best of all and gets really excited for library and art.  It kind of broke my heart the other day when they went on a field trip and she came home and said "we *learned* something on our field trip today!!"

[lindberg99]

This is not on the topic you asked about but I'm just really curious. Does the school say anything about so many absences? Here we can only have 10 per year without a doctor's excuse. The secretary has told us always to ask for a doctor's excuse even if we are under the limit because it makes reporting easier for them or something. If you go over 10 absences without dr excuse, they turn you over to the truancy board (or whatever it's called). Is this a private school?

I hope you figure out something that works for your daughter!

[majormajor]

my DD really only likes art and music of her specials, which each happen once a week. today she came home and told me she had a FANTASTIC day at school and i was so happy! then within an hour she was crying and telling me she didn't want to go back. but she was tired after school, so i'm going to choose to believe she really did have fun. and miss me. but also have fun.

akmbloom, it sounds like we're in similar positions with homeschooling. i'm sure i could make it work, but DD loves seeing her friends. and i am certain our families would give us lots of grief too. plus, i feel like whenever we  play "school" at home, younger DD gets kind of neglected because older DD is very driven and demands a lot of my attention.  i don't think it'd be fair to younger DD to do this for hours a day.

lindenberg99, no one's ever said anything to me about her absences! hm, i dunno. it's a public school. maybe it's a state difference?

[loraxc]

I totally understand your frustration. For us gr. 1 has been better than K, but this is not always the case. FWIW, I would be careful with the absences because it may make the school feel negative towards you. Lots of absences can make a school look unstable, and the numbers actually enter into calculations of "school quality." Teachers also get anxious about kids missing days. I would be worried about alienating the school, even though I get where you are coming from.

[wendy23]

Kindergarten was like this for us too. My son was an OK reader, but was really far ahead in math. He came home lots of days saying he did not learn anything in school, and cried many mornings when it was time to go. It was really sad and I hate that he was not happy. He loves kids as well and is an only child, so homeschool is not a great option, although he thinks he would like it, I know it would be hard. He has lots of great friends at school.

We did a couple things - I did send in a folder of work for him to do when he had time. Our room had stations, and I contributed some upper level puzzles and different toys that would interest him when he did have free time. His gifted teacher has recommended logic puzzles. She feels it is important to make them think and move beyond the memorization of math facts. I think this was good advice for my child.

I also changed my attitude. Once we decided that we were not going to homeschool, I never said another negative thing about school to him or around him. I think I was feeding some of his dissatisfaction.

First grade was better, and second grade is still a little better. Once they were learning things beyond simple reading and arithmetic, it was easier for his teachers to differentiate their lessons. In addition, there was science and music and their gifted pullout. For us, it has gotten easier, but kindergarten was the hard.

[MJB]

We're having some of the same issues with my kindergartner. He sometimes seems really happy with school and other times he cries and tells me it is boring. He loves learning new things but whenever he tells me something new and I ask where he learned it, the answer is almost always a book or TV and only very rarely school. He gets really excited when they learn something at school (he came home and counted by 5s to 200 for me the day they learned that). He is learning Spanish and likes to learn new songs. He gets take home reading at a late 2nd grade level (which is easy for him, but they are supposed to finish the book in 10 minutes and he doesn't mind). He never had to do anything with the sight words or alphabet; that would be totally inappropriate and I can't believe your daughter is suffering through that! 

How old is she? Would a grade skip be possible? My son was early entrance (just turned 5) so we're hoping his current grade will work out but if he was older, we'd definitely skip him. 

I also don't want to homeschool (have done it before with my 8yo) and hope it doesn't come down to that. We might try Montessori next year if I don't feel like his current setting will improve. The head of the school has been very sympathetic and has gifted (adult) children of her own and I think next year might be better. This is the biggest source of worry in my life (I know, first world problems) and I just want my kid to fit in and be happy.