When does their language use really take off?

[sunnygir1]

Remind me when toddlers get enough words to start being a little more civilized.

My ds is 16 months and uses some words and signs, but not all that consistently.  He spends plenty of time pulling on my leg and screaming at me -- it's really starting to wear on me.  I keep thinking he seems a little too old for that, but maybe I'm just impatient, or maybe my dd was advanced in the communication area.

I really wish I had been using more signs with him.  I guess it wouldn't hurt to start working on more now.  He doesn't really use the one's I've been using consistently, except "water".

Anyway, he's frustrated and so am I.  I am so sick of the screaming.  I know their are lots of factors:  developmental milestones, eye-teeth, possibly 2yo molars, etc.

Thoughts, ideas, commiseration, encouragement?

TIA

[Skippy918]

My son at 16 months was still at the grunting and pointing stage.  Once he got closer to 2 and now at 2.5, he's much more verbal and tells me what he wants. 

[Spring Lily]

I see you had a girl first and now a boy...their development is often pretty different. If you're comparing him to her, well, don't!

There's a wide range of normal. My oldest was verbal really young, like by her 1st birthday she had a long list of words she was saying. My next two didn't say more than a few words until they hit two, and then it really took off. It certainly had nothing to do with how many/which teeth they had, I've never heard of that before.

I think at this age he'd be frustrated regardless of if he can say the words or not. When he's tantruming, speak to him the same as you would if he were talking to you. Boys can have a harder time calming down from tantrums, they just have a different brain chemistry. Just label his feelings for him and verbalize why he's upset, because it will calm and reassure him to feel understood.

[sunnygir1]

Originally Posted by Spring Lily 

I see you had a girl first and now a boy...their development is often pretty different. If you're comparing him to her, well, don't!

There's a wide range of normal. My oldest was verbal really young, like by her 1st birthday she had a long list of words she was saying. My next two didn't say more than a few words until they hit two, and then it really took off. It certainly had nothing to do with how many/which teeth they had, I've never heard of that before.

I think at this age he'd be frustrated regardless of if he can say the words or not. When he's tantruming, speak to him the same as you would if he were talking to you. Boys can have a harder time calming down from tantrums, they just have a different brain chemistry. Just label his feelings for him and verbalize why he's upset, because it will calm and reassure him to feel understood.

Lol!  I didn't mean that his teeth had to do with his language development, just that teething is probably a factor in the amount of screaming he's doing throughout the day.

You are right, of course.  I need to be more patient and calm with him and keep talking.  It just drives me kind of crazy -- for example, he struggles and screams for 2/3 of his diaper changes and hates the toilet and potty seat, so I'm sort of at my wit's end about that situation.

He really is an amazing, wonderful, fun, happy, healthy child.  I'm just having a hard time with certain behaviors.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

[Llyra]

It varies so much. My DD1 at 16 months said not one single word. DD2 was putting two words together, and had fifty or more words already. DS had about 8 words. For all of them, though, the language thing really came together at around two years old. At this age, I think it's more about their level of emotional control, more than the words. Even DD2, my talker, still acted that way. Their ability to regulate their emotions is just so immature. I think sometimes too that once they're walking, and saying a few words, our expectations increase-- they seem like toddlers, so we start to expect them to be like toddlers, and to be able to wait a second, or calm down and ask, and stuff like that. But before 18 months, they really are still just babies.

Hang in there! It'll come!