Need advice for adults getting along in HS support group

[LaurenS]

This may seem strange, but I am finding myself having trouble getting along with a mom in our local HS support group. We meet at a park and the kids play while the moms chat. I have loved this group for so long. This particular family has been part of the group for many months, but I am finding myself at the end of my rope. She is a very nice person. It is a personality conflict. She pretty much just talks about herself and goes on and on and on while everyone just sits and listens. If anyone starts to talk about something, she always cuts them off and starts off telling how whatever was brought up relates to her life. I find this annoying. I try to start a side conversation with someone else, but everyone seems the need to be polite to her and listen. I feel like a child, but don't know what to do. I don't want to gossip behind her back, so I haven't asked anyone else if this bothers them. DH has taken the kids to the park and says that it annoys him as well and he offered to write her an anonymous letter. I think that would not be good. I feel like people would know it was from my family and feel like I was being mean. Does anyone have any advice? Has this ever happened to anyone else? I feel so helpless.

[Lakeeffectsnow]

How about sitting 10 or 15 feet away with another mom and just have a separate conversation?  Or wait until she takes a breath and very pointedly say, "As I was saying...."  and continue with conversation.  Some people, like myself, tend to ramble and don't always notice conversation cues.  I'd respond much better to someone gently or not so gently telling me I'm dominating the conversation, then to an anonymous note. Anonymous notes always seem passive aggressive to me.  Or as a coworker told me, "It's not always about you, Lakeeffectsnow."  I was very hurt when she said it, but I try to keep that in the back of my mind when      

My DH would just talk over her in a louder voice, each and every time she interrupted him.  He's like bulldozer, probably why we are still married.  I'm surprised our kids ever get a word in.

[AAK]

We have people like this in my family.  I think I was probably like it too for a while.  Now, I am very aware. . . anyways, what I do at family events on my side (since this does not happen on dhs side) is, I TRY to wait for a pause (which sometimes doesn't come) and then say, somewhat loudly "MY turn now".  Even if she doesn't stop talking, the others will pay attention to you.  If she keeps talking, say "whoops, I wasn't finished yet."  Or, "let me finish please".  

If I notice that someone else wants to talk (usually my kids), I will break the conversation of the "talk alot" with, "Just a moment, Anna has been waiting patiently for a pause in the conversation, but it doesn't seem to be coming.  Anna, what did you have to say?"

People don't interrupt for fear of being rude.  But, it is just as rude to monopolize the conversation.  If this doesn't work, do you know the entire family?  Instead of your dh writing a letter, perhaps he could mention it in conversation with her dh.  He would most likely mention it to her at a time without an audience.  To be honest, I am fairly sure my dh mentioned it to me.  I was embarrassed, upset at first, but he did it in private.  I thought about what he said and realized he was right.  That is why I am very aware now.  That and trying to teach my kids to really wait at one gpa's house and to be a little more aggressive/assertive at the other gpa's.

Amy

[PGTlatte]

I would just wait it out.  Eventually people will tire of the focus on her, or she will feel she has satisfied her need to put herself out there.  If she is somewhat new to the group, she may not know another way to join in, and this is the only way she knows to not feel left out.