I am currently at a loss with my marriage, my husband and I are quite young and we have two amazing little boys together.
Dh see's his contribution to our family as soley financial, he goes to work 12hrs a day to provide for us but comes home and acts like a complete slob. I am so sick of carrying his extra weight, sick of hearing everyone praising him, when in fact they have no idea at all what he is really like to live with. He see's our son's for an hour or less on weeknights yet he has no patience or understanding for them. He is rough with our son, trying to teach him to be tough, but instead our son is scared of him and doesnt trust his dad. He chooses to not be actively involved in parenting the boys on the weekends. He wonders why they don't listen to him, it's because he is never here and chooses to use inconsistent methods of parenting.
He always has an excuse for where these issues stem from he has had depression in the past and has continous weight issues which are now bordering on obesity. His father died when he was 15, his mother was a lesbian for 15yrs while he was growing up. His mother was in and out relationships while he was growing up. I guess he know's no stable home. That would make me strive to be a good solid parent. He is not present emotionally or physically for our son's or me. He is setting such a bad example for our sons.
Because he is never here, i hardly miss him. The boys see him so infrequently If we split up they'd probably see him more. I have tried so many times to help him with so many things, his on and off depression i have tried to motivate him to eat better and exercise. Yet here we are again. His way of dealing with issues is to sweep them under the carpet. and not deal with it.
Where to from here.......................? I am feeling resentful and angry towards him now. I don't want my children to be involved in this kind of behavior.