Parenting while pregnant

[atnightingale]

I am getting increasingly frustrated with dealing with my 4 y.o.'s tantrums when my body is less and less helpful. If she is throwing an absolute fit, I can't really pick her up anymore without hurting myself.  Alternately she will hang on my hand until I am off balance and my hips scream.  If she runs, I can't catch her.  The thing is she knows I am not as strong at this point and at times she uses that.  We use our consequences after the fact but that doesn't help if we are in a physically unsafe situation to begin with.

Now I am not trying to imply that this is an all the time thing.  Of course it happens more when she is tired, and we certainly have other coping skills.  But I have a delightful STRONG willed kiddo, and it does happen.  

How do you deal with these physical aspects?

[windymama]

I'm having the same problems with my 3.5 yo.  It took us about 20 minutes to get from the car to the apt building the other day.  I can't pick him up either, especially since I'm usually carrying my (not-yet-walking) 21 mo.

[JFTB1177]

Yes, pregnancy is a LOT harder when you have other kiddos! I have a 4 1/2 year old and a 23 month old and it is exhausting! I guess the upside is I am much more active than I was when I was PG the first time lol. Hang in there!!

[Stayseeliz]

A 4yo can be reasoned with to a certain extent. DH has been drilling into our 9, 7 and 3 yo's that their job is to go out of their way to help mommy right now and that they have to be a good behavior, etc. When one misbehaves we remind them that they need to be helpful right now. Nipping behavior in the bud before things spiral into a tantrum is a good thing to practice too. I know that's hard when you're pregnant but addressing issues before they get out of hand and being consistent are huge helps.

Parenting during pregnancy is tough. I'm ready for this baby to come so I feel like a human again and not a ball of hormones! Hang in there mamas!

[msmiranda]

I'm going through some of the same issues, except as yet DS1 is not taking advantage of my lack of strength.  I was also very, very sick during my first trimester and pretty much laid out on the couch so it has been a struggle from the very beginning of this pregnancy.  The hardest thing for me has been trying to deal with the skirmishes between the two boys -- pushing, hitting, taking toys, etc. because it is hard to parent while lying on a couch!  In terms of the kind of situation you describe, my "solution" has been not to go out with the two of them by myself if I can help it.  Me being sick and it being winter, I can get away with that for the moment, though I do hope in the spring to start taking them to the playground every day.  But in terms of going to stores or whatever, either my DH will take one of them or we do errands solo. 

Right now I'm only 20 weeks so I can still pick DS1 up and everything.  Which is good because when he needs to be removed from a situation we normally take him to his room to cool down and talk about following the rules -- but his room is up a flight of stairs with a baby gate at the bottom, so it's going to get interesting once I can no longer pick him up.  I'll be watching this thread to see if others have better advice!  Hang in there. :)

[nadia105]

IF this is happening when you are out of the house, it can help to be very specific with her about what you expect.  "DD, we are going to be going to xyz and there are lots of cars around there, so you have to hold my hand".  If she follows your request, I would let her know how helpful that was and how much fun it was to take her to xyz.  If she doesn't, I would probably make a point of doing a few errands when DH is home and letting her know she can't come with me b/c it isn't safe for her to run off, drag you, etc.  She's 4, so she understands you and can be reasoned with.  Heck, in a situation where I really just needed her to cooperate b/c I was tired or sick or whatever, I wouldn't be above bribing (not my go to parenting technique, but it can work if it isn't overused).