Help!

[Teamusery]

I have never posted on one of these sites before, but my girlfriend and I are just starting our 4th "trying to make a baby" cycle today. I did my 3rd IUI three weeks ago, and after a very disappointing negative on Sunday started my period today. Ugh

Needless to say, I am growing frustrated. We have followed the doctor's orders every month. The first month we did 50mg of Clomid and Ovidrel. For month 2, we did 150mg of Clomid and Ovidrel. After having a "Come to Jesus" meeting with our fertility doctor, we tried Femera and Gonal-F for this last round. All have ended up NEGATIVE!!!!!!!!! We have only done one insemination per cycle as our doctor doesn't feel that more than one would be beneficial. My doctor is starting to frustrate me.

I feel like we are missing it obviously. The timing has been generic for the most part.........................36 hours after our Ovidrel shot. So this month, we have decided to take matters into our own hands. We have enlisted the help of  a midwife friend, and we are now going to try to do this at home. 

I need help ladies! I am clueless................................I am a pro at taking OPK's now thanks to 3 failed IUIs, but apparently, I am still doing something wrong. I have a gay friend who is willing to be our donor, but I don't know where to start with him. I know he needs to get tested, and we need to draw up some paperwork. Anyone have any advice for the testing process? Where could I get the testing done for reasonably cheap (or inexpensive since this is fertility we are talking about)? 

And timing? Does anyone have any advice for how we should time these? 

If fresh doesn't work, then we would like to do at home with frozen, but the sperm bank we have been working with only sends out sperm if doctor signs a release. Guess which doctor won't sign a release? Mine! We asked at the beginning of the process. 

Where can I turn? I am sick of not being taken seriously. The doc keeps saying, "It just takes time." blah blah blah. But I only have so much insurance coverage! I feel like we are just tossing them down the drain. We may have to move on to IVF, but I don't want to go that route yet. 

I am sorry for venting. It's just I live in the Bible belt of the South................SC to be exact. Do you know how much fun it is to talk about lesbian conception there? I am just getting frustrated with the whole process. Every month that I get a negative, my heart breaks, and I cry. I know it's crazy, but I feel like I have suffered a loss each time. 

Well thanks for any input and/or advice! I wish good luck to any of you who are struggling with this as my girlfriend and I are. I won't give up if you won't either! 

[by-the-lake]

nm *

[starling&diesel]

Welcome to MDC! Head on over to the Queer Conceptions thread ... the women there are a wealth of knowledge.  I've never done an IUI, so can't help with your specifics.  But lots of other folks over there have been in versions of your boat. 

[Teamusery]

How do I get there? Sorry I am new to this place. Thanks for the help. :)

[lisedea]

http://www.mothering.com/community/forum/thread/1288387/january-queer-conceptions

Here you are!

[2moms3kids]

We have always done our IUIs 24 hours after Ovidrel or a positive OPK (depending on if the cycle is medicated or not). This has always worked for us. We have never done more than 1 IUI a cycle and 2 of our 3 girls were conceived on the first month and the other was conceived on the first month of clomid (which was 100mg and Ovidrel). GL!

-Sarah