Loving all this :) I am having my 2nd homebirth in april as well! I am due on my 3rd childs 1st bday! LOL so i JUST had a homebirth last april, waterbirh and it was amazing. I have a different MW this time and really like her alot! I am excited....
Checking in with homebirth mamas - Page 2
DD was born at a free-standing birth center and it was nice.
This time, though, we're having a homebirth. WooHOO! We have a great midwife team and things have been going great with them. Don't know how I'll feel about water (didn't get much out of it last time) but we have a giant jacuzzi tub in our master bath, which we'll have ready to use.
We've told some relatives but not others. We expect my husbands family to have irrelevant objections (they were SO RELIEVED that we had a girl last time because we wouldn't have been able to get a boy circumsized at the birth center- they were shocked and appalled when we said we wouldn't have bothered) and I would rather not tell them until after, but I'm leaving it up to him. If he wants to tell them, he can deal with any objections/questions they raise.
Hey ladies! How is everyone doing? I have a week and a half until I can have a homebirth if I go into labor. I'm confident that'll happen. I was working on my birth plan. I had pretty much nixed it since it's a homebirth, then I realized there would probably be some things that would be helpful to lay out since people's desires vary. I'll paste it below.
We met with our doula today (though we've talked a good bit already and were pretty comfortable with her) so that was fun. I have a lot of my supplies but need to order the birth kit soon. Our home visit with the mws is next week. I greatly desired a photographer because I LOVE good birth photography, but we just couldn't fork out $800 for one that I LOVED. So my doula suggested she could ask around on a list for photographers who want more birth photos in their portfolio who'd come for free just for the exposure. So I hope that might work out.
I'm feeling great when it comes to the SPD that I've been dealing with, my chiro would be so proud of how well I'm moving around haha.
So we haven't been telling people about the homebirth except immediate family and a couple close friends, and a lady from church (my DH is the pastor) asked us today where we were giving birth. I gave a flustered answer of "We're not sure!" then turned to DH and said, what do we say?? She was the ONE we'd fear asking since she's a nurse and worries and we knew she'd scold us. But, we felt we couldn't lie and she asked if we were homebirthing after so we said yes, and she was totally cool with it and said women have been birthing for years and she's seen what can happen in hospitals. So, that was a relief even though we didn't need her approval. So far, we've gotten a lot of support all around. I'm afraid of a question in front of my baby shower group this Saturday though! I may try to avoid the answer if I can. But, we decided we'll just be honest, we're confident in our decision.
My birth plan: (I also have a transfer plan)
We realize a lot of this is probably a given in having a homebirth but though we’d put our desires out there anyway since everybody’s different. Mom is committed to having a homebirth and a VBAC, so if she starts talking about transferring for pain relief, please support her extra and help her cope with the pain and remind her of her desire and that the pain will not last. If she starts asking for a cesarean as a result of not coping with the pain (vs. a medical reason), please encourage her and physically support and give food/drink. She believes, leading up to the birth, that she can succeed at this. Also remind her of the strength that the Lord gives her.
We’d love photos taken of the birth if we’ve been unable to find a photographer
• Mom is open to a water birth or a land birth, whatever ends up happening, and in whatever position
• Mom is open to variety of labor positions and suggestions but otherwise would like quietness during active labor, although she seems not to notice anyway. But music would be good. She doesn’t really want to be asked how she’s doing.
• If it’s sunny, Mom would love the blinds open to let the sunlight in during pushing, but otherwise would probably like it dimmer (maybe, we can play it by ear, she doesn’t recall noticing light/dark during labor last time)
• Mom would like to be discouraged from looking at the clock or knowing what time it is
• Mom would like to push with the urge to push, only with coaching to, say, slow down a rapid pushing stage to minimize or avoid tearing
• Dad would like to catch the baby if possible and declare the gender
• Mom’s preferences for immediately after the birth are
- to have immediate skin-to-skin contact with baby
- to be left undisturbed for 1 hour following birth, newborn procedures performed afterward
- be warmed with a blanket from the dryer to facilitate the uterus clamping down
• Mom would like clamping & cutting of the umbilical cord to be delayed until blood stops pulsing. If resuscitation is necessary, please do so with the cord uncut. Dad would like to cut the cord.
• Mom would like to deliver the placenta spontaneously without cord traction
• Mom consents to prophylactic pitocin if you feel that would prevent a possible PPH
•We will be refusing the eye goop
•We plan on refusing the Vit K unless the birth results in bruising to the baby
•We consent to PKU testing
We're also pretty close to term - 2 weeks I think. I've got all the homebirth supplies ready and am ready to get them used and out of the house!! They're so cluttery because of how temporary they are. They take up way more space than the baby stuff. :lol
I'm having my home visit next week, which should be nice.
My MW wanted me to have cranial sacral therapy, which I'm going to decline. I'm a skeptic and not in the mood...
Once again (I had a planned HB with DC) I'm not all that focused on transfer even though I did transfer with DC. My MW thinks the only way I'll transfer for this baby is as an emergency transfer. I think she's right. In that situation I'd rather defer to the ambulance/hospital staff. I do think I'll pack a bag this time and I'm going to have to prep DC - thanks for the reminder!!
I've been pretty good about staying off the sofa but could really walk more...grrr!
I'm due the 28th, but my midwife is out of town after this weekend until the 29th or 30th. I don't know if I'll end up going into labor while she's gone (and using her backup) or if things will wait until she gets back. All my midwife visits have been home visits, but starting this week we go to weekly visits. I'll see the doula next week and the backup the week after, and then my midwife will be back.
We've got the birth kit and all the supplies except for the tub, which we pick up on Saturday. I'll be 38 weeks on Monday! I'll print out my transfer plan today and stick it into the transfer bag I packed the other day. I know some people think that packing an emergency transfer bag is tempting fate and "giving in" to the idea that you might have to transfer, but in my opinion, if I don't pack one I might need it, so hopefully packing one will be like a charm ensuring I'll never need the bag.
IdentityCrisisMama, I don't like the clutter, either! I've got a big stack of stuff on a side table in our tiny living room (4 room apartment over here) and I can't wait to put it all away again. ;)
CookAMH: I thought I'd be keeping it more on the down-low that we're doing a homebirth, but I've surprised myself by just telling almost anyone who asks. The one person I lied to was my dermatologist (because I didn't want to risk having a whole discussion with her). And I didn't mention it to my family member who is a nurse (we were at a funeral, and, again, maybe he wouldn't have cared, but I didn't want to risk it). Everyone else has been really supportive. One friend said the idea made her nervous, but she was not being all "horror story" about it, so I didn't mind her saying that. And she does know people who've had home births. And one coworker said something like, "I thought that people were moving away from homebirths," which was a sort of odd comment, but she didn't follow it up with any negative details, so I didn't let it bother me. Oh, and my in-laws are nervous about it, perhaps because they're research scientists and have worked in hospitals and are traditional in that sense, but they're trying so hard to be supportive and nonjudgmental that I can't complain.
I want some photos taken at the birth, but my husband thinks that our midwife mentioned she doesn't like having photos being taken at the births she attends. I can't imagine that she actually said that (unless maybe she just doesn't want to be IN any photos, which is fine by me). I have no memory of her saying that, either. I think I'll just tell him to take any photos he likes and I can edit them later. ;)
I'm full term today so we're on for a home birth! I'd really like this baby to stay in until at least March 18 as I'm planning to work till then, but would definitely prefer she wait until April. Given our spending lately in preparation for the baby's arrival, I definitely want those 5 days of salary. I've also got all of our homebirth supplies on hand and I just need to get them organized. I had this huge list of all of the various items we needed, but then decided to order them online from Momma Goddess and they arrived yesterday. It was so much easier (and cheaper!) to be able to get everything I needed from one shop and not to have to spend a couple of days running around the city. Whew!
This weekend, we're going to do a trial run of setting up and emptying the birthing tub. Once that's done, I'm going to feel totally prepared, relaxed and ready for this birth.
• Mom consents to prophylactic pitocin if you feel that would prevent a possible PPH
I really like that line from your birth plan, CookAMH and I think I'm going to borrow it. Like you, I had had a hospital birth plan drawn up just in case of a transfer. However, I realized in finalizing my hospital plan, that I should write down my homebirth plan as well. In the least, it was a good exercise in sharing my labour vision - it turns out that I clearly had one, but hadn't communicated it all that clearly to my DW or doula. I've been going back and forth on the pitocin for PPH. There was some earlier fear in my pregnancy that I may have this clotting disorder, however, I did all of these tests and I don't have it. The tests also revealed that my clotting is 105% of normal (so I'm an overachiever!). The PPH fear still lingers for my midwives, and to a lesser degree myself, so I've been asked to consider pitocin. I'm just not sure how I feel the interaction of all the natural oxytocin and labour endorphins will mix with something synthetic.
Here's my homebirth plan in case you're interested:
Primary Caregivers: Claudia or Amanda
Children: R (15) and B (13)
• We will be setting up the upper level of our house for birthing and I would like to labour wherever I chose notably our bedroom, bathroom and nursery
• I am planning to have a natural birth and will use a combination of movement, counter pressure, hot and cold applications, birthing tub, touch and massage, aromatherapy and meditation for pain management
• I imagine that I will be very introspective and internally focused during the laboring process and would like to do so in a calm, comforting and serene environment
• I would like to be supported by my birth team in labour and delivery in various gravity-enhanced, vertical positions
• While I am bearing down, please encourage me with supportive statements like, “You’re doing great,” “You can do it,” and “Hang in there.”
Immediately After Delivery
• I would like to have to have immediate skin-to-skin contact between the baby and myself after her birth and will encourage immediate breastfeeding
• We would like to have our midwife cut the cord and we would like to wait until the cord has stopped pulsing before it is clamped and cut
• We plan to keep the placenta and have provided a bucket in our birthing kit for this purpose
• We would like to delay the vitamin K injection for our baby until after I have had the chance to nurse her and the midwives may leave the eye medication for us to administer
• I would like to have all procedures, no matter how routine, discussed with me prior to administration
• I have agreed to have oxytocin preventatively administered to reduce any post-partum hemorrhage risks or complications
• I do not want to have a heplock or IV, unless an intervention is imminent and medically necessary in the case of dehydration or the administration of medication
• I understand that there may be circumstances in which it is necessary that I transfer to the hospital. Some of these situations are unambiguous, while others are judgment calls. While it will be a joint decision, I will rely upon the expertise of my birth team to help make this call.
• Our children may be home and may choose to participate, or not, as they are comfortable in the labour and delivery process
• J or Hayley will attend to the children’s needs as they may arise
Food and Drink
• There will be snacks/food and drink on hand for the labour team. This is a self-serve household – eat/drink what you want and please put the dirty dishes in the dish washer.
• We will have some sort of special meal and cake to celebrate our daughter’s arrival
Edited by gumshoegirl007 - 3/10/11 at 8:36am
I made a birth plan for our home birth with DS, but it really wasn't necessary as my midwife had spent so much time with us at each appt that she knew (and had noted in my file) the things I wanted/didn't want/needed. Instead of a birth plan, I'm thinking of making a 3x5 note card for each person who will be there (mw, apprentice, my mom, MIL, DH) with the things I expect/need from them.
I packed a bag in case of transfer last time and will be doing it again this time. I am way too type A to rely on DH to go back to the house and be able to find the things I want/need to be comfortable during an overnight stay. I also would rather he be able to stay with us than have to leave to go get things. Guess I should probably pack something for DS too in case he ends up at Grandma's if we can't get anyone over to our house to watch him.
Last time we were picky about who we told we were planning a home birth, but it ended up coming out to family a week or two before he was born and there was no real fallout. Just a lot of "We're so glad you and baby are okay" after the birth We haven't been shy about telling anyone this time. But, we have an awesome home birth under our belts and we've been interviewed in the newspaper about it, so it's not something we could hide if we wanted at this point since everyone's first question is if we're doing "that" again
I greatly desired a photographer because I LOVE good birth photography, but we just couldn't fork out $800 for one that I LOVED. So my doula suggested she could ask around on a list for photographers who want more birth photos in their portfolio who'd come for free just for the exposure. So I hope that might work out.
Thanks so much to everyone for posting their birth plans! It gives me a lot to keep in mind when I write ours up some time in the next week or so.
I have 6 days till 37w. I'm already having prodromal labor - baby has dropped, the shape of my belly is radically different now and tons of ctx so hoping to keep it in till at least then, but would prefer to keep this one in till April. For one, I just don't feel ready yet and also since this is likely my last pg I want to savor every moment. :) Also a silly/selfish reason is that then I have a March, an April and a May baby. :P I had prodromal lablor and was dilated to 5 for 3 weeks before DD was born so hopefully this one stays put a while (though I COULD stand some easing up on the ctx - some are quite uncomfortable already and sleep would be nice!!). Hoping also to be able to use the tub this time. DD was so fast that I didn't even make it upstairs let alone to the tub. We had our home visit yesterday and it was funny to talk about all the contingency plans (keep a small stack of towels and chux downstairs, too, just in case of another super fast labor, etc.). I tend to think that BECAUSE everyone expect me to go early and super fast I will go past my EDD and have my first ever slow labor!
This is our 2nd HB and people pretty much expected it so no real comments this time. We didn't "tell" last time will I was 36 weeks so we wouldn't have to listen to comments too long though! LOL I still had most of the towels and such from last time so only had to buy the disposible and/or stuff that expired.
One thing I didn't see mentioned in birth kits was DERMOPLAST!!!!! It's a spray on analgesic that totally numbs the area for a few hours at a time. I would never typically use it but DS was a hospital birth and they gave it to every mom PP and HOLY WOWWIE!!! It helped those first few days with the pain and burning. I need to get a new bottle for this one since the one that was tossed in with my birth supplies from last time is expired. Seriously mamas, go and get some. It's cheap (maybe $5 at Walmart/target) and even if you only need to use it once you will not regret it.
We are officially "go" for homebirth as of this coming Saturday (2 days from now, yay!). Our birth pool rental is being delivered next Saturday at 38 wks, though if I should go into labour early I'll be making an emergency call to them and hope they can bring it over asap. LOL We still need to do our home visit with the MW sometime in the next couple of weeks. DH is starting to get anxious and nest-y because he's worried that the baby will show up early. I don't really think so but I don't know how much I can predict it either. So my plan is to just take it easy for a couple of days till we're in the homebirth "safe zone".
I'm going to start shopping for supplies and getting the house ready soon, tomorrow is my last day of work before I go on mat leave (gotta love Canada!). Next week we will pick up our homebirth kit that the MW office sells with chux pads and the like so that will take care of a lot of what we need.
My 36 week home visit is Tuesday. I have a couple of supplies to get/find but nothing major. The birth kit I ordered is here, towels/blankets/clothes are all washed. SO from that perspective I am feeling ready. I was feeling good mentally, but DH and I have been having a hard time lately, he hasn't read any of the hypnobabies materials, so mentally I am not feeling as prepared. I am still working and will work through end of next week. I feel I am more in work mode lately and really need to get out of my head, ya know. I also feel the need toprepare myself that DH will not be prepared in a way that I want him to be.I knew from the beginning he likely wouldn't, but he seemed to be interested and said he do whatever Iwanted but now that we are about there, yeah, not so much.
Oh and most people still think I am going to a birth center, including family. My mom asked where and who would be there besides DH, I told her "where" and said the midwife, assistant, doula would be there. She said she would like to be there but would respect my wishes, but she WILL be coming over once I am home. Guess who will NOT be getting a call any time soon after the birth. Her entitlement just shocks us. I am not close to her, I have no idea what makes her think I would want her at the birth or showing up unannounced when she wants. Besides lying about the location, is it any wonder why I told her a due date of May 1, when I'm actually due the 9th?
We're having a homebirth here too! I need to make it 37 weeks which is just 2 weeks away thank goodness. My baby has dropped, lots of contractions (which I did with DS as well) and tired. I get random spurts of hectic energy and have been a nesting fiend. lol
We have only told my in laws that we're delivering at home. My rents and the rest of the family think hospital lol. It's just much better that way because it would only make them nervous. They tend to be more mainstream in that manner. At the end of the day, it's up to DH and I, but I don't want to deal with the extra stress so it's just better that it's not mentioned. Other people know and are totally cool with it.
My transfer plan, btw, mostly consists of desires surrounding a c/s, to the extent they can be honored. I too don't anticipate transferring for anything but a c/s.
I got the details on the birth kit and will go ahead and order everything. I don't care for the pink and blue hospital striped hats, so I'm not sure if that is the kind that is included or what. Obviously I can throw a different one in the oven packet that I'll need to get ready.
I had to choose between two tubs, La Bassine and a bigger green one with a lid. I opted for the smaller one, no lid. Any reason I might regret that? Both are the soft inflatable kind as compared to the Aqua Doula, and I'm renting from our student midwife.
I figured out something today. I've been feeling great with regard to pelvic soreness and figured out why - I've hardly spent much time in the car in the last several days. Today I had an hour roundtrip errand to do and feel like I am waddling now. Felt limber and really good yesterday!
Dermoplast is a great idea! We had our DS at home, and I had spent so much time planning for the birth, and for the baby, that I was really not prepared for anything regarding post partum recovery for myself. Of course, he was my first baby, so I really didn't know what to expect as much. This time I'm planning on getting the dermoplast, witchhazel, cotton balls, and long pads that I can soak with witch hazel, and maybe freeze them. I also plan to have some pull-up depends to wear for the post partum bleeding and discharge; so much easier to manage postpartum then pads, IMO. We have everything we need for the homebirth, except I want to get some electrolyte drinks, and some honey sticks. All the other stuff, we have. Oh, except for the birthing kit that our MW will bring with her next week for our home visit. I do need to get it all gathered together into a box so that we have easy access to it. And we need to pull out our inflatable birthing tub from DS's birth and get it sanitized from sitting in storage. Hopefully I will have time to do all that, as I am already 36 weeks. I can't believe it's all getting so close already!
Oh, I get it now. I read your birth plan and thought it was your transfer plan. Got it! I'm not doing a plan for my MW but we have been talking about lots of the issues you have in yours. I'm trusting that these things will be in her chart (I see her writing requests and concerns as we're talking).
I do need to revise my pit plan - I've think MW and I left it that I would like pit as a preventive. I want to be sure MW knows that I was speaking about pit after the birth of the placenta. And, I am leaning towards only asking for pit if I have a long pushing stage and/or other signs lead to MW thinking PPH may be an increased likelyhood. I'd really rather not have it but I'd REALLY like to not have another PPH.
What are everyone's plans for a pediatrician? I really like DC's doctor so we'll keep her for this baby. I spoke to her today about a home visit after the birth. Unfortunately she doesn't do that. She seemed a bit extreme at first as far as when she wanted to see the baby (saying w/in 24 hours!) but, fortunately, I had spoken to my MW first and she told me all the things that she does for newborn care. I managed to leave the pediatrician with a more open time frame. It seems like I can get away with bringing the baby after the MW completes her care without getting grief from the doctor. Which, gearing up for the whole vaccine thing all over again, I am not looking forward to. I swear...not a single "non/delayed vax friendly" doctor that we've seen (4 of them!) have been 100% on board. I know it's the party line and I guess I'm lucky that they haven't been too pushy but, MAN, they are coming out with new vaccines every 6 months (Hep A now and a mandatory pox booster) it seems and then you get the big push. All in all the doctor was really cool about it but it's just so exhausting to me.
I'm sorry to hear how many of us don't want to tell people about the birth. I have told everyone and haven't gotten any negative reactions at all. One person I would have hesitated with is the school nurse at DC's school. I get the feeling she would be pretty shocked and a bit opinionated. OTOH, she just told me today that her grandmother had 21 live births!! No way all those kids made it to the hospital. Can you imagine??
If you want some advice - I'd investigate the things your ped would want to do (pku test and etc.) and find out if your MW does that. Either way, I would just be as vague as you can and just play dumb, "Oh, you wanted to see me? My MW was providing postnatal care up until now." Ask your MW to give you her good baby records from those first days/weeks and bring those with you when you go in for the first time.
I'm planning to write up a birth plan with a "homebirth" section as well as one for "hospital" and "c-section". A hospital transfer here means I may either stay with my MW or transfer care to an OB depending on the circumstances, so I'll probably err on the side of caution there. The "homebirth" section will just be more like discussion points for our next few appointments I think (we still have lots to cover IMO) so I will do the two (home and hospital) separately.
I'm kind of there with you, unfortunately. The fact that he hasn't even read the Birth Partner is pretty surprising to me, and I think it's making DH anxious too cause he's starting to act a little stressed. But the book's still sitting on the counter. I'm so glad that I pushed for taking a prenatal class even though he thought it wasn't needed, at least we got some exposure to what happens, what to expect, and for DH lots of "natural birth re-programming" as his ideas were pretty mainstream before. Blah.
The fact that he hasn't even read the Birth Partner is pretty surprising to me, and I think it's making DH anxious too cause he's starting to act a little stressed. But the book's still sitting on the counter. I'm so glad that I pushed for taking a prenatal class even though he thought it wasn't needed, at least we got some exposure to what happens, what to expect, and for DH lots of "natural birth re-programming" as his ideas were pretty mainstream before. Blah.
Maybe you could make him up a few pages of what to expect in more of an easy read/ maybe bullet format and make sure he looks over your birth plan so he knows your desires. I'm kind of doing something like that for my hubby. The worst part about possibly needing to transfer is hubby is not very good at talking to people of authority. He'd likely just let them do whatever they wanted to me and baby as he'd be too afraid to speak up based on my previous experience with him. I'd probably be my only advocate but there's nothing I can do about that. I'm just hoping to stay home.