Quote:
Originally Posted by
SWONTrecycler 
I agree, grandparents should have the right to connect with their grandchildren. It is also in the grandchildren's best interest (in most cases) to have contact with their ancestors.
Personally, I have a court order to see my deceased daughter's children. But I have not seen them in over 2- 2.5 yrs. The guardian's have not upheld the court order and there does not seem to be a children's lawyer involved to protect these children.
And I can not afford a lawyer so here I sit!
There are also other children that they do not consider my the grandmother of their children.
I have come to the conclusion that I have to wait for these grandchildren to come to me on their own.
I continue to pray for my children and grandchildren anyway.
Suggestions are always welcome.
My honest suggestion would be to try and mend the relationships that you can. I am sure that will be much harder after you have taken them to court and tried to force their hand in raising their own children, but my best suggestion is that you can still try. You could apologize and try to regain parent's trust over time. Offer to listen to them from a pure place and see why they felt the need to protect their children from you in the first place. It sounds like you have nothing to lose. Who knows what might happen? A letter might be good, if you are not on speaking terms with them.
Just try and think what your part was in the break down of the relationship in the first place, and fix that to the best of your ability, because honestly that is the only part you *can* fix. You can't change other people. Try and see it from their side. Were you an abusive parent? Did you ignore the rules they had in place for their children? Did you badmouth the parents to the children? Not trying to be negative, but the facts are that it is very unlikely that the children you raised yourself simply woke up one day and randomly decided to cut you out of their lives 'just because.' There was most likely a breakdown somewhere in the relationship you made with your children.
I hope this comes across right. I have been on the other side, and I think that is a valuable place to learn from each other. I know what would work in my family's case, and what would not. Court case = No. Honest Change, Open Hearts, Sincere Communication, Mature Boundaries = Yes.
Why do the other children not consider you the grandmother of their children? It would be easier to offer suggestions if we knew more of the circumstances. I do not say this to be hurtful, but just to help you honestly evaluate the situation, but if a lot of them feel that way, maybe you should look at yourself and try to figure out why they all agree. We all have room to grow, and honestly, you should at least consider that there are valid reasons that the other adults do not want you around their children. If you aren't willing to consider it, you won't be able to change it. I know it's hard. But if you really want to fix things at this point, what else can you do?
That's nice that will you pray for them anyway. I would pray for the entire situation and for yourself as well as them. If you are willing to get to the bottom of the issues that caused the separation in the first place, who knows what could happen?
Let us know, okay?
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