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UC support thread #3 (March 30- April) - Page 2

post #21 of 150
citizenfrog~~ It's nice to see you back with us. So what did you name your little guy? Are you going to post a birth story? Hope you are having an awesome babymoon.:
post #22 of 150
Thread Starter 
Yeah Tracy! Can't wait to hear your birth story! Glad to hear things went so smooth.

post #23 of 150
Citizenfong, CONGRATULATIONS! I am SO happy that it went well for you.
post #24 of 150
Hi everyone,
I haven't posted in weeks but have been in lurker mode and I'm so glad to hear all of the wonderful birth stories. Yay! Mamas having babies!
I have had a fear set-back...my youngest dd swallowed a nickel and had a minor choking incident (lasted about 5 seconds) but I freaked. Really freaked over it. Then decided that I am just not capable of be in charge of the care of little beings.
I have now entered the third trimester which means that the protective optimistic hormonal high of last trimester is just gone. I also signed up with some uc list-serves that seem to love discussing complications, even though birth story after birth story ends up being fine.
And THEN I went to a LLL conference this weekend and ended up at a table next to a mama who had a uc birth go terribly wrong about 6 weeks ago. Unfortunately I was within listening distance and YIKES! How do I get back my confidence? Any ideas, or positive birthing vibes that you can send my way? Affirmations etc?
post #25 of 150
Hi Hathor, I'm by no means experienced as I'm pregnant with my first while planning a uc. But I have MANY affirmations -- one that may work for you: "My baby and I are fully capable and deserving of a blissful, painless, and easy birth. "(Enter whatever words you want.) The "deserving" part has been a big one for me -- I think of what my family would think if they knew I was planning a uc, all their fears and admonishments. And part of me was thinking that maybe I don't "deserve" a healthy, safe birth since I'm keeping it from everyone. But now I know that is ridiculous. We create our own reality. My reasons for not telling anyone is a protective mechanism for my baby and my peace of mind. I also have another one "I choose faith instead of fear."
I repeat my affirmations first thing in the morning, last thing at night, and whenever else I think of it. I'm a big fan of Laura Shanley's and I believe her when she says that we can have any kind of birth experience we desire.
I hope this helps!


P.S. I have another one that always sends warm vibes when I say it: "I am open and receptive to any communication from my baby." I figure this is a good way to open up to any suggestions he/she may have about birth positioning, how to prepare, and how to relax.
post #26 of 150
I’m here! A little update on me... I am almost 34 weeks and feeling great. I’m finding I have energy for nesting and then my body tells me AFTER the fact that I’ve done too much – I wish it would tell me DURING so I could stop and rest THEN before I overdo it. Oh, well. I'm having fun unpacking little tiny clothes and diapers, and finally - FINALLY - beginning to imagine our house with another little baby in it (this was an unexpected pregnancy and unlike my others it's taken me a really long time to get used to the idea).

Thankfully, all three of my children are now sleeping through the night. This is no small thing for me. My boys were still waking in need of reassurance just a few months ago, my oldest weaned in the early months of my pregnancy, and my second son has cut back dramatically to nursing maybe once a week. Much to my surprise, my toddler daughter self-night-weaned at 15 months - like a gift from heaven, she doesn't even need it to go to sleep anymore - I say this because my boys were still night-nursing at age three and my eldest was nursing to sleep still at age four, so I was not expecting her to cut back at this age. I haven't slept through the night in almost six years; I get up to use the bathroom two or three times a night and that is all, and it seems like an amazing thing to me. Fingers crossed that this new baby is not a high-needs one - I'm enjoying my sleep, and especially think it's fun that I'm dreaming again, which I never did when I was chronically sleep-deprived.

ChildoftheMoon – not sure who is due next in this group, but I’m due mid-May.

Mamajaza – My baby JUST turned head-down a few days ago. S/he was very happily transverse and/or head-in-the-ribs until then. This is baby #4 for me and if I remember right #3 was also persistently transverse until about 34-35 weeks. At some point just before this baby turned, I finally realized that I was being uncharacteristically nervous about the baby’s position – unusual especially because I have been SO totally relaxed about every other aspect of this pregnancy/birth. So I had a long talk with the baby and decided to trust him/her to pick the best position when s/he was ready. I think that was about a week ago, and I think my “letting go” was a factor in the baby turning.

How do I know the baby is head-down? I’m feeling some cervical stabbing and also feeling my pubic bones stretching in front. Guessing that is the head starting to make a cozy spot. What used to feel like a little bowling ball under my ribs (the head) now feels pointier and more oblong, with small parts attached to one side, so I’m sure that is that butt pointing up now.

Please keep in mind that head-down is not the whole story for good positioning. Simply having a head-down baby doesn’t mean your baby is in a good position for birth. There is a WONDERFUL booklet that I must highly recommend – it’s called “Optimal Foetal Positioning” and it’s available through the midwiferytoday.com website. It is definitely at the top of my must-read, must-recommend list and I hope everyone reading this will consider reading it because it’s really simple and useful information that can prevent a lot of labor and birth troubles. If nothing else, be sure to avoid reclining positions like slouching in a soft chair or couch. Sit straight or lean forward a bit to prevent baby from engaging in a posterior position. When sleeping on your side, put your top knee forward and down on the bed so your belly hangs forward more than back, to help the baby into a good position. The key is to be in a good position when the baby’s head decides to engage in late pregnancy, so the baby’s back is settled against the front of your belly and not against your spine. If you think your baby is posterior (and the book tells you how to figure this out), get on hands-and-knees or spend time leaning forward over a birth ball or low table or something to help the baby into a better position.

Also, what about the idea of letting the baby pick which position is best for him/her? My midwife (my friend now, attended my 3rd birth) told us that in her 20 years of experience attending births she has found that breech births are NOT as difficult or dangerous as we are led to believe, and also that in many cases there is a good reason why the baby did not turn head down. Sometimes it has to do with the shape of the mother’s uterus (I have a friend whose babies are always breech), sometimes how the cord is wrapped around the baby, sometimes there are anomalies that make breech a sensible choice. I find that interesting and reassuring. Lots of people try to get breech babies to turn head-down only to have the baby turn head-up again. I have to wonder if maybe there is a good reason for that. I don’t mean for this to contradict what I just said about encouraging good positioning – the book I recommended explains how our modern lifestyle results in less-than-optimal positioning and how that can be remedied, but I think if your baby persistently chooses a particular position even if you try your best to help it into an optimal position, then it’s best to leave things alone and assume baby knows something you don’t.

What are all of the rest of you planning on for your birth? Do you have a supportive partner or are you doing it alone or with a good friend? Are you going to labour in water?

We are actually renting a birth tub from my midwife friend – this will be my third water labor, and my second waterbirth. My DH is supportive, he’s wonderful, I love having him as a birth partner, but I am not attached to the idea of him being with me when I am in labor. I think circumstances will dictate whether or not he’s a part of it. I think I would like to have him around, but we will see. I have three other small children that will need caring for. My two sisters and one friend are willing to come help with the kids if we ask them to, but they are all 30 minutes to 2 hours away, two of them have other children, and they all have other commitments that might or might not make it tricky for them to come. I don’t love the idea of having others there, but I do want my children’s needs met by someone else while I am laboring.
post #27 of 150
amyamanda~ I love your kids names! Do you have one picked out for #4? Thanks for the info on positioning. I was reading that it is a big deal in other "less developed" countries. THe midwife will put a scarf under a womans bumm as she is lying down, and lift up the two edges of the fabric and shake the baby into a good position, as they say.

I was also wondering from you ladies, what your philosophy is on diet in pregnancy? I, personally, think I will get what I need, from my diet. I don't take prenatals, but I do take coral calcium, floradix iron occasionally, vitamen c sometimes, other herbs occationally, and clay(the only thing that I REALLY crave). I don't take anything EVERY day. I go by how I feel. Since you mommas are kind of enlightened (don't tell anyone else I said this) about trusting your bodies when giving birth, do you have the same sort of philosophy about your diet during pregnancy?
post #28 of 150
My baby and I are fully capable and deserving of a blissful, painless, and easy birth. ]
Hey Kate, Thanks for that!
post #29 of 150
mamajaza - I am glad you like my kids' names! Every one gets tougher...this time the only ones we've come up with are Asher or Avery...both more common than the others we have chosen, and both more fitting for a boy (we have no idea what we'll do if it's a girl, maybe use Avery, or scramble for other ideas). I love that my kids have unusual names but it's tougher and tougher to come up with names for new siblings! Has anyone else thought of names yet?

Also I find it interesting that you read positioning is more of a big deal in less developed countries. My impression is that it's more of a problem in countries of "leisure" such as our own. As I recall, the theory is that our bodies evolved to expect our babies to engage while we are doing hard standing or kneeling labor. Examples might be hoeing, weeding, leaning over a washtub, grinding grain, that sort of thing. Nowadays so many people sit in car bucket seats too long, sit unergonomically at desks all day, hire other people to do their housework, and then come home and flop back into a soft lazyboy chair or couch and watch TV...anyway, you get the picture. The best kinds of work I can think of in our culture for proper positioning are pushing a loaded shopping cart, sweeping or doing yard work or gardening, and scrubbing floors on hands and knees.

I find it all very interesting and hope you don't mind me sharing! ;-)
post #30 of 150
amyamanda~~When I said that it's a big deal, I meant that it's something that matters, ie. the baby's position should be optimal. I'm not saying that they have *more* problems with positioning, but they care about the babies position, unlike here in the west, where if your baby is posterior, "oh well, I guess you'll have to suffer". Do you see what I meant? It's so hard to express things sometimes over the net.
post #31 of 150
Oh, that totally makes sense, I just misunderstood what you said. I usually think of a "big deal" as a problem. Thanks for clarifying.
post #32 of 150
Thread Starter 
Amanda-thank you very much for all the info. Very enlightening.
post #33 of 150
Well, I finally figured out a way to share some pictures. No birth story yet...that's next!

post #34 of 150
Great pictures!!!
post #35 of 150
awwwww! so cute! nice name too, emerson.
post #36 of 150
He is darling. And yes, what a great name!

Can't wait to hear the story!
post #37 of 150
Thread Starter 
He is so beautiful! I love all the hair
post #38 of 150
To my fellow UCers (and supporters):

A friend of mine has started a yahoogroups list for people interested in seeing some serious research done on planned unassisted birth. We are still in the very early stages of trying to define the parameters of the study and how it will be conducted. If any of you have any ideas for this, please contribute them!

The list is at: http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/UCRSupport/
post #39 of 150
Citizenfong, what a little doll! A sweet chunky doll! Congratulations!

post #40 of 150
CONGRATS Citizenfong!!! What a doll baby!

Question mamas...

Do you plan to use a fetoscope or doppler during your UC and how important/unimportant do you think they are?

Also same question for a cord clamp.

I popped in a while back and introduced myself but have been lurking ever since.My friend who has asked me to help her with her UC is due any day now so all of the sudden I'm having lots of last minute thoughts.What do ya think?
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